Tracy Anderson covers the new issue of Health magazine. The interview is made of lies. Too harsh? Perhaps. It just feels like Tracy has a sketchy relationship with the truth and what she really does (and has done in the past) to keep herself “in shape.” She’s also a close-minded fraud and a shade-throwing, name-dropping starf—ker. How’s that for harsh? Anyway, Tracy talks to Health Mag about the “disease” of vanity (ARE YOU JOKING), name-dropping more celebrity clients, and how she used to love to dip cookies in icing before Gwyneth Paltrow told her that only peasants eat cookies.

The fad that’s hurting women: “One hundred percent: It’s called celebrity. We should love their work. But to blow up their importance to the level of obsession takes away from our own beauty and our own gifts. There’s a disease here—the disease is vanity, insecurity and the lengths of unhealthy behaviors people go to to achieve what they think is beautiful. The disease of ‘I’m not worth anything unless I look like that person over there.’”

The change in women’s bodies: “I think it’s changing, and that excites me. You take a Kim Kardashian, who is a curvaceous, voluptuous, petite woman—and she’s on the cover of Vogue! I like that. I think that’s progress. Lena Dunham, who is a buddy of mine, is on the cover selling magazines with her beauty and her light.”

She’s not all about giving women the same body: “I want to get away from ‘Tracy Anderson is going to make you teeny-tiny.’ I’m not trying to make everyone the same. To me, ‘hot’ is not defined by a height or weight or measurement; hot is going to the root of who you are.”

Cookies with icing: “It involves Gwyneth. I was so good at designing bodies, including my own, that I could eat a pizza and a tub of ice cream every day and you wouldn’t see it; it was like a free card to eat whatever I wanted. And I was in London, dunking cookies in frosting. And she looked at me and was like, ‘What are you doing?’ And I was like, ‘What do you mean? It’s so good!’ And she’s like, ‘Do you know how toxic that is?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ And she’s like, ‘And you’re still eating it.’ I was like, ‘You know what? She’s so right.’ That was almost nine years ago. That was the last cookie dunked in frosting I ever had.”

Creating her method: “… It was very apparent to me that being a ballerina wasn’t going to happen. But I’ve always been, like, ‘Welp, there’s a different purpose for me. There is something else I’m supposed to be doing.’ Then at 21, I gained 60 pounds while pregnant with my son, and that’s when I started creating my method.”

She really hates juice cleanses: “Anybody is going to lose weight if they drink liquid all day long. That’s like lunchtime liposuction or freezing the fat cells off. You don’t own that change. The weight is coming back.”

[From Health]

The only consistency here is that she’s always hated juice cleanses. Seriously, she’s always said that juice cleanses are stupid if your aim is weight loss (and I tend to agree with her on that and that alone). Her talk about needing more diversity in the body types represented in the media is not really consistent though. She’s been talking about that, on and off, for a few years (like when she took Kim Kardashian on as a client), but she always shoots herself in the foot by publicly criticizing the “problem areas” or “disaster bodies” of various women who dare to not fulfill their size-2 glory. As for her comments about “the disease of vanity” – bitch, you’re the one taking on beautiful celebrity clients and telling them that they need to lose weight to look more like [fill in the blank].

CB also pointed out that Tracy’s cookie-and-icing story has changed over the years – Tracy told the story back in 2009, back when she was partnered up with Madonna (before Madonna had a falling out with both Tracy and Gwyneth). In Tracy’s original story, Madonna witnessed Tracy eating cookies dipped in icing and Madonna called Gwyneth. This is the quote from Tracy’s Hello interview in 2009: “Madonna called Gwyneth and said, ‘I am sitting here with Tracy and she is dipping Oreos into Pillsbury icing,’ and Gwyneth was like, ‘Please, Tracy, nothing processed.’ So I have cut out processed but I will not deny my sweet tooth.’” So why didn’t Tracy mention Madonna this time around? Perhaps because of Tracy’s old relationship with the guy who defrauded Madonna’s Malawi charity?

Photos courtesy of WENN, Health Magazine.