Every single preview of the Prince and Princess of Wales’s Boston trip has the air of barely concealed panic. William and Kate will arrive in Boston on Wednesday, the 30th, and stay in and around Boston for three days. Apparently, they’re not adding on any other cities or events to their trip, although Kate is taking her buttons and pie charts to Harvard. My sense is that William and Kate are trying desperately to manage expectations, to bring down the temperature on this trip, all while the royal rota is screaming, crying and throwing up about how this American tour is the most important and significant trip that the Waleses have done in a decade. Page Six had another preview this weekend and you can just tell that William and Kate were “thrown off their game” by the simple fact of the Sussexes receiving the Ripple of Hope Award in New York. Like, that’s thrown the Keens into chaos. Some highlights:

William & Kate are coming to claim the crown of the royal family’s No. 1 couple. Although palace sources are keen to stress that the Waleses’ US visit is not an official tour, there’s a lot riding on the three-day trip — particularly as Harry and Meghan will jet to NYC on December 6, just four days after Kate and William leave the States, to pick up the Robert F. Kennedy Ripple of Hope award. One well-placed royal insider told Page Six that the brothers’ opposite missions underscore a big point: “It’s not bad to receive an award, but it shows the fundamental difference between [William and Kate] — who have constitutional roles, who are working on behalf of others — versus being a celebrity. They were always famous, but now they’re reached a different stage in their public lives — they’re different types of figures.”

Kate is going to cosplay Diana the whole time, I guess: It’s a “real opportunity for a big wow moment,” said Bethan Holt, Fashion Director of the Telegraph and author of several books on royal fashion. “If anyone can combine talking about something very seriously with delivering this huge boost of glamour and royalty it’s William and Kate,” Holt told Page Six. “This is a big chance for the British segment of the royal family to make a big splash and remind everyone why they are loved and to re-establish that connection.”

The Waleses want to recreate Diana-esque moments: Kate, and William, 40, will also be following in his mother’s footsteps by reaching out to underrepresented communities, just as Diana did on her 1989 NYC trip when she visited young AIDS patients in Harlem. “The Prince and Princess didn’t want to come in for the awards show and then leave, they wanted to spend time getting to know communities in Boston,” said a source close to the couple. “The Earthshot Prize is the Prince of Wales’ Super Bowl moment — and he wants to use the platform in a positive, optimistic way to shine a way on climate change and the environment,” said the source close to the Waleses.

No distractions: The Earthshot awards ceremony will air on PBS on December 5. Days later, the Sussexes’ Netflix docu-series is set to launch, swiftly followed by Harry’s tell-all memoir, “Spare,” which promises “raw, unflinching honesty” when it is published on January 10. Meanwhile, the close Wales source said, “The Prince and Princess of Wales will be focused on getting on with the job at hand. They are not going to be distracted.”

The Sussexes need to get on with it! Added the well-placed royal source, “Look, everyone wants Harry and Meghan to be happy and focus on the future — you have a beautiful family, it’s time to get on with it. For the Prince and Princess of Wales, their belief is ‘Life’s too short and there’s too much to do’. You get on with your lives and your work without having to worry about any games from anyone else.”

[From Page Six]

Hahahahahahaha. Nothing says “we’re moving on with our lives” than multiple palace-sourced preview articles arguing that William and Kate are here to “steal the Sussexes’ crown in America.” This is also amazing: “It’s not bad to receive an award, but it shows the fundamental difference between [William and Kate] — who have constitutional roles, who are working on behalf of others — versus being a celebrity.” William and Kate aren’t going to Boston through their “constitutional roles” though – they’re going because William’s staff made up a keen environmental award scheme and William has already blown through millions of donor money to embiggen and promote himself. There’s no constitutional mandate that says the Prince of Wales must turn up in Boston and try to keen it up with the Kennedys. Meanwhile, the Sussexes are simply being given an award for being iconic.

A few more things – it’s sad to me that after more than eleven years of marriage, with this incredible platform, Kate has set the bar so low for herself that all anyone can say is “she better wear something interesting” and “we can expect her to superficially cosplay Diana.” Even with the bar that low, she’ll still f–k it up too.

Photos courtesy of Instar.