Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck were at the same place at the same time yesterday, but they were not photographed together, nor did they arrive together. They both attended Samuel Affleck’s elementary school graduation on Wednesday and both of them got dressed up for it too. Is that a thing? Elementary-school graduations are now events to which parents need to wear suits and dresses? Jennifer Garner was obviously there as well, as was Ben’s mother Chris Anne Boldt, who has seemingly been in town this week specifically for Samuel’s graduation. Ben drove himself, and J.Lo was driven to the graduation separately.

In the past month or so, Ben and J.Lo have been showing up pretty consistently for their stepchildren’s events. J.Lo went to Violet’s graduation stuff too, and she reportedly took Violet out for a special lunch. Ben turned out for some of Emme’s end-of-school events too, I think. So, no matter what’s going on with Ben and J.Lo’s marriage, they’re really prioritizing the kids and making sure they still show up for the kids’ big events. I keep thinking about J.Lo’s now canceled tour, and wondering if she would have had the time to do all of these family events if her tour was still on.

Reportedly, the Garner-Afflecks had a big lunch at Baltaire in Brentwood after the graduation. I don’t know if J.Lo was included, but she was seen entering Ben’s rented Brentwood home after the graduation ceremony, and after she did a costume change. Yeah… no one is saying divorce, and I hope Ben and J.Lo just spend the summer with their kids and with each other.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

Bad Boys: Ride or Die had a great opening weekend & now there are tons of thinkpieces about how the audience is still cool with Will Smith after he slapped Chris Rock. [Pajiba]
Bradley Cooper’s current facial hair is so unfortunate. I just got the ick. [Socialite Life]
The Morning Show cast updates: Julianna Margulies is out & Marion Cotillard is in. The Marguilies stuff is unsurprising, iykyk. [LaineyGossip]
A Pride Month announcement: Maren Morris is bisexual! [Jezebel]
Unexpected ways to die. [Buzzfeed]
Kerry Washington stepped out to support her husband. [JustJared]
Kim Porter’s father speaks out about Sean Combs. [Hollywood Life]
I can’t believe it’s taken this long for Ice-T to promote ice tea. [Seriously OMG]
Ayo Edebiri looked gorgeous at the Inside Out 2 premiere. [RCFA]
Azealia Banks hates Lorde too, damn. [OMG Blog]

Natasha Archer has worked for the Princess of Wales for years, mostly as some kind of personal assistant/stylist. I don’t think Archer has ever done much with Kate’s “work” in the sense that Archer is not writing or reading briefing memos or setting up busywork photo-ops. Archer carries Kate’s bags when they’re traveling and… God knows. Wiglet-wrangler, perhaps? Still, Archer is one of the few employees to stick around for longer than a year or two. Now, after years of service, Archer has been promoted to “senior private executive assistant” to both Kate and William. Hm.

The Princess of Wales has promoted her ‘Girl Friday’ Natasha Archer to a key position at Kensington Palace, I can reveal. In a move that has been interpreted in Royal circles as a reward for her loyalty, Ms Archer has been appointed to the new role of senior private executive assistant to Kate and William.

Ms Archer, 36, updated her profile on the LinkedIn career website last week to reflect her upgraded status. Previously she was a PA and stylist, and was pictured carrying Kate’s bags on and off planes for Royal tours.

Ms Archer’s promotion follows reports that she personally collected The Princess of Wales from the London Clinic after her abdominal operation earlier this year. After that, the mother of two was brought into the innermost circle of select friends and family members who have been supporting the Princess through her private cancer battle.

Sources say Ms Archer, who is married to Royal photographer Chris Jackson, has been dedicated to her employer. She has been inseparable from Kate in recent months, often assisting her as she travels to and from hospital appointments. Now she will have a title and salary that reflects her trusted status.

A source said: ‘Natasha deserves this boost – she’s unfailingly discreet and loyal to Kate. The salary boost will be welcome too. This appointment means we can expect to see Natasha by Kate’s side for years to come. It seems to be Kate’s way of thanking her for her loyalty.’

[From The Daily Mail]

Shady shady shady!!! “Reports that she personally collected The Princess of Wales from the London Clinic after her abdominal operation earlier this year.” There was a photo of Archer leaving the clinic with a plant riding shotgun. The plant was not Kate. And I’m pretty sure we were told that William picked up his wife, weren’t we?? I mean, that’s if you believe that Kate was ever being treated at the London Clinic. “She has been inseparable from Kate in recent months, often assisting her as she travels to and from hospital appointments.” Has Kate been disguised as a plant this whole time, because you would think if Natasha is chauffeuring Kate around London and Windsor, someone would have gotten photos??

Anyway, I’m sure there are like ten different conspiracies happening right now. Y’all can even bring Natasha’s husband Chris Jackson into the mix. Ten bucks says that Jackson was the photographer who took some of those original photos “taken by Kate or William” released this year, including the Mother’s Day frankenphoto.

Embed from Getty Images

Embed from Getty Images

Photos courtesy of Kensington Palace, Getty.

Following the 80th anniversary of D-Day commemorations in Normandy, Prince William has been telling everyone that he’s an “emerging statesman,” a world-class diplomat and a very important future king on the global stage. It’s true that William was the biggest British name at the Omaha Beach event on D-Day. King Charles visited the British Normandy Memorial and then left before the Omaha Beach event. But what was weird is that Charles and Camilla weren’t the only ones who left before the big world-leader event on Omaha Beach. Prime Minister Rishi Sunak also left early – apparently, he rushed back to the UK to give some interviews as part of the upcoming general election. That’s the only reason why William was seated in the front row of the Omaha Beach ceremony – it should have been Sunak, but he wasn’t there. From the Mail’s Ephraim Hardcastle column:

Could Rishi blame the King for his D-Day muddle? Buckingham Palace provided Downing Street with advance notice that Charles would be missing the international ceremony, principally on medical advice.

It was this announcement which seems to have made Sunak and his acolytes think it was all right to head home early as well.

If the King had stayed, Sunak couldn’t have sneaked off. What no one in Sunak’s team noticed was that the King had appointed Prince William as his official representative for the international ceremony. That backfired. William, as the senior Briton present and representing the head of state, should have been photographed with Biden et al instead of David Cameron. The heir was sidelined.

[From The Daily Mail]

It’s interesting that the Mail is saying that “the heir was sidelined” while the heir has been briefing every rota reporter that he’s a big-boy statesman because of the D-Day events. While William did shake hands with several world leaders (Emmanuel Macron, Justin Trudeau, President Biden), it’s not like anyone takes him seriously. It also feels like the Mail is indicating that it was pretty insulting to Britain’s allies that neither King Charles nor PM Sunak bothered to go to the Omaha Beach event and they were fine sending the angry egg. I know the Mail is pointing out Sunak’s fumble – and it is insulting that he rushed home to do an interview – but make no mistake, they’re poking William too.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

As we discussed yesterday, the Mirror ran a weird story about King Charles’s newfound commitment to being in Prince Archie and Princess Lili’s lives. A source claimed that Charles “would never be content with just seeing his grandchildren on the odd video call.” Which says, to me, that Charles barely even makes time for videocalls with his grandkids – he reportedly saw Archie and Lili via video call on his birthday last year, and I bet that was the last time. Ingrid C-Word was also tasked with trying to make Charles sound like a doting grandfather, and she said: “He does not want a FaceTime relationship with his son’s children. He wants to know them and be involved with their lives while they are still young enough to be able to learn from his wisdom.” What’s interesting about all of this is… no one seems to be buying any part of it. Charles’s actions for two years have shown that he doesn’t give a f–k about the Sussex family whatsoever. Even the Daily Beast’s Royalist called him out: “The King Says He Wants to See Prince Harry’s Kids. So, Er, Why Kick Them Out?”

Cynics might argue that if the king really wanted to see more of the Sussexes he wouldn’t have stripped them of their U.K. home. Many believe that Charles has made it as difficult as possible for Harry to visit the U.K. to avoid him setting up a rival court.

Prince Harry’s camp have long argued that he has made it more difficult for Harry to visit the U.K. safely with his family by evicting him from his home on the royal estate, Frogmore Cottage, where Harry’s children’s security would have been assured by being within the royal protection envelope. Indeed, Omid Scobie in his book Endgame said none other than Harry made this exact point to his father, responding, when told to pack his bags and clear out of Frogmore, “Don’t you want to see your grandchildren again?”

Scobie called the decision from Charles to evict Harry “a cheap shot from a wounded father bound by an institutional system that is often intolerant of human emotion.”

Frogmore, Scobie says, was regarded by the Sussexes as the “only true safe option when visiting the United Kingdom,” due to the royal estate being guarded round the clock by armed guards.

Charles is understood to have seen Archie only a handful of times and has only met Lilibet, who was born in America, once. Charles reportedly turned down an invitation to Lilibet’s christening in California.

[From The Daily Beast]

It feels notable that there’s any pushback on Charles’s attempts to go back to briefings-as-usual about how he obviously wants to see Harry and Harry’s children (but not Meghan). Tom Sykes is right – the Frogmore eviction was absolutely the turning point, as was Harry’s most recent visit to the UK. When Harry released the statement on May 7th about how there were no plans to meet with Charles during his visit because of “the king’s full program,” it really was a game-changer. Harry isn’t playing Charles’s stupid games anymore and Charles showed his panic about that in the days and weeks that followed.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Cover Images.

Maybe I’m the biggest delusional B, but I’m honestly not getting “imminent divorce” from any of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez’s moves. It absolutely feels like they’re having marriage problems and it absolutely feels like there’s a lot happening behind the scenes, but I think they’re actually trying to work out their sh-t. It’s messy and complicated, but I would be shocked if one of them files for divorce this week or this month. It genuinely feels like Ben has laid down the law with J.Lo: we’re selling the money pit house, you’re not going to tour this summer, and we’re going to actually work on this marriage and spend time with our kids.

Page Six got photos of Ben visiting the money-pit mansion over the weekend. Jennifer is still living there, although she’s reportedly looking for rentals or other, smaller homes too (considering they’ve already put the house on the market). Ben reportedly stayed with Jen for four hours at the Beverly Hills home, from 5 pm to 9 pm. A date night? Negotiations? Packing up his sh-t? He didn’t leave with boxes, so I don’t know. But they continue to spend time together. Now, Entertainment Tonight’s sources sweat that Ben and Jen are living separate lives:

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have not fully thrown in the towel on their marriage yet. Just one day after ET reported that Lopez, 54, and Affleck, 51, had put their marital home on the market, a source is sharing where the couple stands as rumors continue to swirl around the state of their relationship.

A source tells ET, “Jen and Ben have been living separate lives but have not officially separated yet. At this point, they are just doing their own thing. They went into their relationship very optimistic and thought things could change, but they haven’t.”

When it comes to their living situation amid the listing of their $60.8 million Los Angeles compound — which they purchased just a year ago — the source shared that Lopez is looking for places to set up shop as they attempt to take some space and figure things out.

The source continued, “Jen is touring houses and shopping around for her own home. She has been leaning on her mom, sisters, and kids during this transitional period.” Lopez has two sisters, Lynda and Leslie Ann.

Affleck — who was previously married to actress Jennifer Garner and shares three children with her — has similarly been leaning on his close friends, including Good Will Hunting co-writer Matt Damon, and family members during this time.

“Ben is sad about it all but focused on his work, being a great dad, and co-parenting well with Jennifer Garner,” the source says. “He has been leaning on Matt Damon and his close circle of guy friends. Matt is always in Ben’s corner and is supportive of him.”

[From ET]

I would pay $50 to hear what Matty D thinks of this whole situation. Damon is an old-school J.Lo hater, and during the first Bennifer Era, Matt was one of the “friends” telling Ben to escape. The “Bennifer Revival” was great because it felt like they were older and wiser and less likely to get peer-pressured into ruining their relationship. But I don’t know. I think Matty D is still capable of peer-pressuring Ben. Anyway, yeah – as I said, I would be shocked if Ben or Jen actually file for divorce any time soon.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

Ordinarily, I don’t find English footballer Harry Kane all that “hot,” but standing next to Prince William, Kane really does look quite sexy. Such is the fate of every guy named Harry – compared to William, you’re always going to come out ahead. These are photos from Monday, where William visited Team England’s training camp at the national football center. The visit was timed because the UEFA European Football Championship (aka The Euros) starts on Friday in Germany. William is the Football Association president, so he was wishing the team well, plus visiting with some of the kids doing various programs at the training center. He gave Team England some advice, straight from Prince Louis, who William absolutely saw on Monday morning.

The Prince of Wales had some very important advice from his youngest son Prince Louis to deliver to the England football team on Monday morning. The Prince of Wales, who is the president of the FA, visited the England men’s football team to wish them good luck ahead of the UEFA European Football Championship, sharing advice from Prince Louis to “eat twice the amount” during the tournament.

Travelling to St George’s Park, the national football centre in Burton upon Trent, Prince William met the squad and spoke with coach Gareth Southgate ahead of their first match against Serbia on Sunday.

“I was on the school run this morning with the children and I said, ‘What shall I say to the England team today?’” he said. “The best bit of advice I got to ask you was to eat twice the amount you normally would eat. So I then had visions of all of you running around with massive great tummies and loads of stitches on the pitch so I think maybe take my youngest’s advice with a pinch of salt.”

He presented shirts to each of the 26 players selected for the Euro 2024 team and heard from their coach about their preparations for the tournament. England, who were beaten 1-0 by Iceland in their final warm-up friendly on Friday, will first face Serbia in Germany on Sunday night.

[From Hello]

Who is William if he’s not reminding everyone that he does the fakakta school run as often as possible? I’m shocked that he managed to do the school run AND visit the training center on the same day. Just a reminder – Louis hasn’t been seen in public since Christmas. Neither has Charlotte. In all of the talk about whether or not the Princess of Wales will make it to Trooping the Colour, I have my doubts that all three of the Wales kids will be on the balcony this coming Saturday.

Also: I wonder if William is planning to go to Germany for any of England’s matches? My guess is that if the team makes it far into the tournament – maybe quarterfinals or semis? – he’ll try to go. Which brings up the issue of how he failed to show up for the Lionesses when they made the World Cup final last year.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

Over the past month or so, there’s been a conspiracy bubbling around social media about the Princess of Wales. The general conspiracy is that Kate is no longer in England or the UK, that she’s receiving treatment at an undisclosed location in Europe or North America or somewhere else. While I think “Kate is not IN England at the moment” might explain the lack of credible sightings of Kate in Windsor, London and Norfolk, I have my doubts that Kate could be in a whole other country where the Windsors don’t have control over the press. Like, if Kate was in France, the Windsors don’t have the capability of shutting down French rumors. You could argue that Switzerland is the land of “everyone minds their business and no one gossips,” but still, we’re talking about arguably the most famous missing woman in the world right now.

So, one of the latest “Kate is not in the UK” rumors came via a Reddit and TikTok, with various people claiming that they heard a rumor that Kate was seeking treatment in Houston and staying at the city’s St. Regis hotel. The rumor was apparently shut down pretty quickly by Kensington Palace.

A rumor that Kate Middleton is being treated at the MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston is false, according to a Kensington Palace representative.

Speculation about the princess’ location has grown since she announced her cancer diagnosis in March. She began preventative chemotherapy in February, according to Kensington Palace, with no estimated date of when she might return to public duties. Middleton stepped away from public duties and a palace insider told Us Weekly in June that she “may never come back in the role that people saw her in before.”

Amanda Matta shared a video Monday morning on her Royal Family-focused TikTok account “Matta_of_fact” discussing a Reddit post that claims Middleton recently stayed at The St. Regis Houston.

“Was visiting friends at the St. Regis this weekend and they had spoken of her being at the hotel. Has anyone else heard this? Assuming she would be here for treatment. Hoping for the best outcome for the family,” the post reads. Matta’s TikTok had nearly 500,000 views and more than 1,000 comments by early afternoon Monday.

MD Anderson Cancer Center representatives said the hospital is unable to comment on whether or not an individual is a patient due to patient privacy laws. The Cancer Center — known for its groundbreaking cancer treatment and research — has treated celebrities including Eddie Van Halen and Chris Evert.

[From Houston Chronicle]

Okay, here’s the interesting thing – that one TikTok had only been up for about twelve hours when the Houston Chronicle got Kensington Palace to shut down the speculation on the record. KP did not do the same thing when it came to ANY of Concha Calleja’s reporting. To this day, KP has never shut down the “Kate was in an induced coma” story on the record. It was only “royal sources” saying “that’s not true” one week after Calleja’s reporting. KP still hasn’t pushed back on some of Calleja’s more recent reporting, that Kate’s condition is still quite dire and that Kate will likely need at least one more surgery.

So… no, I don’t believe Kate is being treated in Houston. If Kate has left the UK for treatment – which I do think is a possibility – it’s far more likely that she would go to European doctors or specialists, and she would go to a country where her privacy would be all but guaranteed. She’s not wandering around Houston!

Photos courtesy of Cover Images.

The photos in this post are from April of this year – Prince Andrew out riding a horse in Windsor on 4/13 and driving around Windsor on 4/29. They’re some of the most recent photos of Andrew we have, although the Mail has published some more recent pics, especially these horse-riding pics from one week ago, right after Buckingham Palace leaked a bunch of sh-t about how King Charles is going to cut off Andrew’s funding if he doesn’t move out of Royal Lodge. It’s pretty clear that King Charles is still attacking Andrew in the press and drawing attention to the Andrew situation, likely as a deflection from some of the bigger issues facing the monarchy. Well, things have devolved to the point where the British media is now writing pieces about how Andrew has gained a lot of weight and he’s “comfort eating” because of the Royal Lodge issue.

Prince Andrew has piled on weight amidst his brother King Charles’ attempts to kick him out of his home, after giving up a diet which was making him miserable and grumpy, it was reported Monday.

A report in British tabloid the Sun said that Andrew’s weight is now approaching 15 stone. The paper says he has been “comfort eating” to cope with his ongoing argument with his brother, who wants him to vacate his home, the palatial Royal Lodge. The Sun says Andrew’s weight gain has been shown during recent horse riding trips.

Royal author, biographer and historian Andrew Lownie, who is writing a new book about Andrew, whose favorite food is said to be steamed syrup pudding, told the paper: “He often diets, a bit like Fergie, who has been a regular dieter. He can go up and down between 13 and 15 stone.”

Royal biographer Margaret Holder said: “He was quite chubby as a child but then so were Charles and Anne at times if you look back at the pictures… I think he is a comfort eater basically.”

[From The Daily Beast]

Is this another shot from Buckingham Palace? Their threats to defund Andrew fell flat, so now they’re telling people that Andrew’s ass is chunky. This is why I made a point of using the most recent photos we have of Andrew – while I think he’s gained some weight in recent years, he honestly doesn’t seem to have drastically piled on the pounds in the past few months. He’s been “portly” for a few decades though. This feels like some palace scheme to humiliate Andrew, right? Why the hell would it matter if he’s gained some weight? If we’re talking about weight, Camilla also looks like she’s been comfort-eating (and comfort-boozing).

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

Bear with me for a moment (that turn of phrase is going to be hilarious in a minute) while I set the scene for John Oliver’s latest shenanigan. Last week on Last Week Tonight, Oliver ended the show by announcing — and displaying on set — that he had bought at auction the entire furnishings of a recently-closed Red Lobster in upstate New York. This week on Last Week Tonight, Oliver had an unexpected follow up. Turns out a bakery neighbor of the dearly departed Red Lobster had been hoping to snag their equipment, and had lamented to local news about Oliver swooping in to purchase all the wares. So Oliver issued a counteroffer: put my face on your bear-shaped cakes, and you can have your ovens. Guess whose face is now on several dozen bear cakes?!

The bakery had asked for the ovens via a handwritten note taped to Red Lobster’s door: On his show Sunday, Oliver joked about how Deising’s Bakery and Restaurant owner Eric Deising had asked the restaurant for a 36-inch flat grill/oven and a commercial kitchen convection oven. “OK, first, with all due respect, if you wanted equipment from that Red Lobster, leaving a note on the door is a weird way to get it,” Oliver said, per the Hollywood Reporter. “The restaurant just closed down. It’s like going to a cemetery and leaving a note on a tombstone that says, ‘Hey, can I have your socks?’”

‘I want to be a cake bear’: [Oliver] said the show had already donated the Red Lobster equipment — but he would provide replacements if there was a “baked good with my face on it on sale in your bakery, specifically a cake bear with my face on it. … As long as it fits the general description of ‘John Oliver Cake Bear,’ I’ll be more than happy,” he said. “So that is my offer. And because I know that the normal way of asking for things isn’t really your style, I’ve written this offer on a piece of paper like this that is currently taped to the door of your bakery.” “Please do say yes because we’ve already bought the equipment. It is right here waiting to be delivered to you,” Oliver said, revealing the equipment, with red bows tied around it. “The bear is in your court, Deising’s Bakery,” he said. “Make me a cake bear. I want to be a cake bear.”

The cakes sold out the first day, will be available all week: The bakery accepted the challenge, creating an Oliver cake, along with Oliver cupcakes that sold out on Monday, the Daily Freeman reports. “I was so pleasantly surprised to come in this morning with this lovely note on the door,” said Peter Deising, the owner’s son. In a Facebook post, the bakery said mini Oliver cake bears will be sold all week, with the proceeds going to a local food pantry.

[From Newser]

This man (and his show) giveth and giveth and giveth to global mirth-by-way-of-mischief, and I am so here for it! Just to underscore the point, Last Week Tonight had already donated all their Red Lobster equipment — and Oliver said the two ovens the bakery wanted weren’t part of the inventory, anyway — so they went out and bought two shiny, brand new ovens to give away. In exchange for John Oliver-visaged bear cakes. It’s a win for the bakery, and a win for the world! And good on the bakery for donating the Oliver Bear proceeds to a local food pantry. (Sidenote: I know Oliver has a tense relationship with the HBO lawyers, but what do the accountants say?! Can you imagine the meetings going over all the line items?)

It took Deising’s Bakery less than a day from the episode airing to the creation of those chocolate, decadent, rubenesque bear cakes, and there are so many artistic choices they made that impressed me. I have to admit, when Oliver first threw down the challenge, in my head I started imagining a caricature of his features rendered in frosting. I wasn’t expecting they’d go the route of an actual (and edible, I presume!) photo of his face. But then, the nose. The frosting button nose they dolloped on his mug, I mean come ON! Diesing’s is proudly showing off their superb confections online, including a snap of a baker holding the handwritten note Oliver’s team left for them. I implore you all to zoom in on that image to read the email address listed. IYKYK.

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Photos credit: Instagram/Deisings Bakery and somethingness_ and Getty