Anya Taylor Joy kicks ass in the new trailer for Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga. [Seriously OMG]
Emily Ratajkowski repurposed her engagement ring into a divorce ring. [Just Jared]
Taylor Russell looked great in The Row. [RCFA]
Another woman accuses Johnny D*pp of being abusive, shocking. [Socialite Life]
Review of The Girls on the Bus. [Pajiba]
Jodie Foster’s awards-season wardrobe was kind of blah. [Go Fug Yourself]
This artist turns cloud formations into cartoons. [OMG Blog]
Amy Duggar sobs as she explains “blanket training.” [Starcasm]
Ariana Grande & Dalton Gomez are officially divorced. [Hollywood Life]
So many celebrities have falsified their backstories completely. [Buzzfeed]

For the past year, Heritage Foundation has been engaged in a truly disturbing attack on Prince Harry’s American residency. The Heritage wingnuts have latched onto Harry’s admissions in Spare that he tried cocaine and he’s used other drugs, including hallucinogens. Heritage claims that Harry’s Spare confessions somehow mean that he lied on his visa application and the only way they can prove that is if DHS releases Harry’s visa application publicly. This is also about Heritage trying to make the Biden administration look “bad,” because the wingnuts have all apparently forgotten that Harry moved to the US in 2020, when Donald Trump was president and presumably the Trump-era DHS originally approved Harry’s visa application. Speaking of, the judge in the case has basically asked to see Harry’s visa application so he can double-check it, only DHS has asked for a delay:

The Department of Homeland Security says it needs an extra two weeks to hunt down Prince Harry’s immigration records as a federal judge weighs whether or not they should be made public. The department made its request in a court filing Sunday, saying it needed more time to respond to Judge Carl Nichols’ order to provide more information about why his immigration details should be kept secret.

The conservative Heritage Foundation is seeking the release of the documents amid questions about whether Harry lied about his drug use in his visa application.

‘Defendant has begun the search but searching for and reviewing the records has taken longer than anticipated,’ wrote D.H.S. lawyers in the filing. They also said other government agencies may need to review the documents before they can be handed over to the judge.

‘Thus, having established good cause, defendant respectfully requests an additional fourteen days, up to and including April 4, 2024, to comply with the court’s order,’ they wrote.

[From The Daily Mail]

Yeah, this sounds like a typical bureaucratic mess, especially given (once again) that the visa application was probably approved during the previous administration. I genuinely hope nothing comes of this case, but just wait – the Heritage wingnuts are keeping Trump informed and they’re feeding him talking points about Harry too:

Donald Trump has once again hinted that, under a second Trump administration, Prince Harry could be kicked out of the United States if he is found to have lied on paperwork about his drug use. Trump told Nigel Farage in a GB News interview to be broadcast Tuesday, when asked what he would do if allegations that Harry may have lied on his visa forms proved accurate: “We’ll have to see if they know something about the drugs, and if he lied they’ll have to take appropriate action.”

Farage asked if “appropriate action” could mean “not staying in America,” to which Trump replied, according to a report on the outlet’s website, “Oh I don’t know. You’ll have to tell me. You just have to tell me. You would have thought they would have known this a long time ago.”

The interview is the latest twist in a legal case that increasingly looks like it could become a real problem for Harry. An immigration lawyer recently told The Daily Beast that Harry could be vulnerable to a politically motivated attack on his residential status, saying: “Department of State decisions are discretionary and very susceptible to political influence. His visa could be canceled. He could be denied entry upon return to the U.S. from foreign travel for inadmissibility due to prior drug usage, despite an unexpired visa in his passport. There are many scenarios where political influence could impact Harry’s ability to re-enter the U.S.”

[From The Daily Beast]

As I’ve said before, if Trump “wins,” there are much bigger issues than “will he deport Prince Harry.” The end of the American republic will be upon us and an army of white supremacists will take to the streets. Which makes it even more notable that our British allies, drunk with white nationalist/royalist fervor, are excitedly pitching Harry’s deportation as a selling point for a second Trump term.

Photos courtesy of Netflix and Cover Images.

Adam West. Michael Keaton. Christian Bale. Ben Affleck. These are all actors who have famously played the Caped Crusader himself, Batman. (I left out Clooney on purpose, *but* I think his cameo in The Flash movie was perfection.) Batman is such a well worn-in property at this point that the chance to play him comes along like six times per generation. Jake Gyllenhaal has long-wanted to play the Dark Knight. And since James Gunn is (infamously) rebooting the DC Extended Universe (DCEU) since taking over in November 2022, he’s looking for a new Batman. In an interview with Screen Rant, Jake commented on fan rumblings about him playing Bruce Wayne’s alter ego, calling it an “honor.”

Screen Rant: Jake, watching you in these action scenes was absolutely incredible. Like I said, it was deliciously visceral. But a while back, I know that you auditioned for the role of Batman, and I got some Batman vibes in this film when you were beating the crap out of people. Is that a role you’d still be interested in, especially after doing a movie like this?

Jake Gyllenhaal: Oh, man. That’s a classic. It’s an honor. Speaking of playing roles that other incredible actors have played in the past, to me actually roles that other incredible actors have played in the past, which, to me, actually, when I think about it, I’m going to play Iago in Othello with Denzel Washington, and I think about like the history of actors that have played that role throughout time, and I’m intimidated by that. So that’s the first level. That’s what I’m working on right now. But of course. It would be an honor always. Those types of things and those roles are classics.

[From Screen Rant]

Alright, I know there’s a good amount of y’all on here who are into this stuff like I am. What are your thoughts at a potential Gyllenhaal Batman? I’m a very hard no on this one. He was fine as Mysterio in Spider-Man: Far From Home but…Batman? Bruce Wayne needs to be played by a certain type of actor and that is not Jake. “But Rosie,” you may say, “What about Robert Pattinson?” I did like the RPattz Batman movie a lot more than I expected to. I think it was because The Batman was an artsy, noir, whodunit version of the character set in an entirely different universe.

At the end of the day, let’s just stick with Maggie as the Gyllenhaal sibling who’s involved in a Batman movie. I suppose, however, if Jake wanted to, there’s always a villain or someone else he could play. There’s also that small matter of Jake’s personal hygiene. Will he commit to daily showers if he plays Batman? It gets hot in that suit, even without all of the ass-kicking. You know Bruce Wayne probably takes two to three showers a day. Anyway, if Aaron Taylor Johson really is going to be the next James Bond, then I put Idris Elba up for consideration for the role. Idris would make a fine Batman.

photos credit: IMAGO/RW/MediaPunch/Avalon, Robin Platzer/Twin Images/Avalon, JW/Bang Showbiz/Avalon

As someone who does not have a strong belief in one particular Princess of Wales conspiracy, I’m just sort of hedging my bets on what’s really going on in The Sun/TMZ video. Allegedly, Prince William and Kate were seen by a random guy on Saturday, at the Windsor Farm Store, and the guy took a blurry video of W&K practically sprinting out of the store. Kate wore leggings, walked briskly and without aid, and she carried a heavy-looking bag. My initial thought was “that’s Kate but she’s had a hell of a lot of plastic surgery since Christmas.” After several viewings, I’m now questioning that – the gait was off, the woman in the video seems too tall and her proportions didn’t seem like Kate’s proportions. I could apparently never say any of this is I worked for any British media outlet, where a strict code of royal-sycophancy must be maintained at all time. Pity this poor BBC sports reporter, who questioned the royal-party line:

A BBC sports reporter appeared to promote conspiracy theories about the Princess of Wales by suggesting it was a “lookalike’ who was photographed over the weekend. The Princess, whose absence from public life while she has been recovering from surgery has sparked a flurry of bizarre conspiracy theories, was pictured visiting the Windsor Farm Shop on Saturday.

Sonja McLaughlan, the BBC’s rugby specialist, echoed this theory online, suggesting the individual seen shopping alongside Prince William was not his wife, but a double. She also suggested Prince William could have been replaced by an actor.

Commenting on a video which compares the individual in the latest footage against past pictures of the Princess, Ms McLaughlan wrote: “It’s so obviously not Kate. Some newspapers are reporting it as fact. But it’s not her. No conspiracy theorist but all very odd.”

She added to her post on Twitter: “Disturbing that newspapers like The Times are reporting this as fact. Headline ‘Kate seen in public for the first time’ when it’s clearly not her. As someone has said. Could be a couple of lookalikes making mischief.”

[From The Telegraph & MSN]

Not only is the video extremely odd, but the reaction to the video is odd and the reaction to people questioning the authenticity of the video is just bonkers. Like, the Windsors have zero credibility now. The Mother’s Day frankenphoto changed everything. William’s refusal to explain why he skipped his godfather’s memorial changed everything. The weirdness around which candid photos and videos are “allowed” to be published has added an extra layer of bullsh-t too – what is palace-approved or not, what is a set-up, why did the Sun run a story with no photos or video about the Windsor Farm Store visit for 24 hours? And on and on. I applaud this woman for at least having legitimate doubts and questioning the wisdom of every British outlet putting THEIR credibility on the line for what could conceivably be another Kensington Palace manipulation.

Speaking of, TMZ executive producer Charles Latibeaudiere has already started walking back the authenticity of the video:

pic.twitter.com/o0EOt1nyH3

— Tina V (@tinavan33) March 19, 2024

I watched several videos of Kate in heels and flats walking and then the clip of Windsor Farm Kate walking. Whoever paid for that video got played.

— Christopher Bouzy (spoutible.com/cbouzy) (@cbouzy) March 19, 2024

Photos courtesy of Cover Images, covers courtesy of the Mail & The Sun.

Previously, I’ve used royal stories in which “royal expert” Nick Bullen is quoted. Bullen is the editor-in-chief of True Royalty TV. I’ve never really gotten a strong vibe either way, that he has a particular agenda or that he has genuinely palace sources or royal sources. But Bullen has given exclusive comments to Us Weekly and this man just ruined his credibility on everything. Bullen says, with his whole chest, that not only did Prince William never fool around with Rose Hanbury, but William is not a cheater whatsoever. Come on, people. Be real. Interestingly enough, Bullen also claims that Rose is “very upset” that the alleged affair rumors are circulating once again. Girl, if I banged an angry Huevo, I wouldn’t want people to know either.

Rose Hanbury is royally frustrated with resurfaced rumors that she had an affair with Prince William.

“I know people who know the Marchioness of Cholmondeley very, very well, and she absolutely was not having an affair with the Prince of Wales,” royal expert and Editor-in-Chief of True Royalty TV Nick Bullen exclusively told Us Weekly on Tuesday, March 19. “Even when those rumors broke a few years ago, she was very upset by them then. She’s still very upset by them now.”

Kensington Palace never commented on the affair speculation, and the rumors died down. That is, until recently, when conspiracy theories about Kate’s whereabouts breathed new life into the alleged scandal. Stephen Colbert even repeated the theory that Kate’s recent months-long hiatus from public life — which Kensington Palace announced in January, citing a “planned” abdominal procedure — is due to trouble in her marriage. “I think we all know who the alleged other woman is, say it with me, The Marchioness of Cholmondeley,” Colbert, 59, said during an episode of The Late Show With Stephen Colbert earlier this month.

Bullen told Us that the lack of information the palace has provided about Kate’s surgery has fueled the rumor mill. “Something the royal family could possibly learn from [this] is that [with] these vacuums that are created, other people can be collateral damage,” he said. “Perhaps they need to think about that collateral damage.”

Bullen called the affair rumors “rubbish,” pointing out that infidelity “goes against everything” that William stands for given his experience watching his father and mother, King Charles III and the late Princess Diana, conduct talked-about affairs during their marriage.

“He saw the damage that affairs can cause,” Bullen said. “What I’m told [is], it’s just not in his psyche.”

[From Us Weekly]

“Something the royal family could possibly learn from [this] is that [with] these vacuums that are created, other people can be collateral damage.” But that’s the whole royal communications model – to create collateral damage to save the reputations of the monarch and the heir. Everyone else is collateral damage fodder, including the heir’s wife and the heir’s sidepieces. As for William never having affairs… lmao. Please. He cheated on Kate constantly throughout their courtship and there’s plenty of circumstantial evidence that he’s screwed around on Kate throughout their marriage too. Now, do I believe that these “entanglements” have been passionate love affairs or that Huevo is emotionally involved enough to toss over his wife and his family-man image? No. But before Kate’s medical issues this year, I could have sworn that William was launching himself as a hot single father.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Instar.

So my quiet little conspiracy about the Princess of Wales is that she, along with Kensington Palace staffers, always intended to do certain things to show her “recovery.” I believe that there was always a plan to release a “new photo of Kate” for Mother’s Day, just as I believe the original plan was for Kate’s first public appearance to be at church in Windsor on Easter Sunday. The thing is, the palace wanted those things to be a surprise – they didn’t want anyone to EXPECT Kate to be seen or to do anything until May/June. They were caught off-guard by the past month of speculation, conspiracies and rumormongering, and they’ve been trying to react in real time, only everyone involved – from senior staff to junior staff to the Waleses themselves – is an incompetent dumbass. It’s given the impression that Will and Kate are staggering from one self-created crisis to another. Mid-stagger, they’re trying to go back to the original plan, only they’ve made everything into such a four-alarm crisis that if Kate doesn’t show up to church on Easter, it will be international news and the conspiracies will get even worse. Speaking of, now “friends of King Charles” are basically letting Kate know (through the press) that she better put on an Easter wig and hustle her ass to church OR ELSE.

Kate Middleton’s return to public life will be marked with a “big bang” return to the limelight on Easter Sunday, March 31, friends of the royals have told The Daily Beast. Expectations are building that the Princess of Wales will walk to church with other members of the royal family on Easter Sunday and greet well-wishers in a show-stopping set piece, heralding her return to public life.

While her officials have been busily reminding journalists that they initially briefed that her return to public duties would come “after Easter,” with some suggestions that could actually mean “after the kids Easter holidays have finished,” a friend of Kate’s and a friend of King Charles told The Daily Beast that they expected and hoped respectively that Kate would attend church on Easter Sunday morning, in just under two weeks.

While Kensington Palace declined to comment on whether Kate would be walking to church on Easter Sunday, or indeed if she would be seen out and about privately before then after she visited a farm shop with husband Prince William this weekend, one friend said, “She is doing well. Everything is on track. Easter will be the big bang moment.”

A friend of the king’s, meanwhile, told The Daily Beast that Charles “of course” hoped Kate would attend church at Easter. However they were also careful to point out that there was no suggestion of any pressure being put on Kate to do so, and that it would be ultimately up to her. (As for Charles himself, while there has been no specific guidance on whether the king will attend church on Easter Sunday, his attendance would be unlikely as the palace has said he is avoiding crowds while he receives cancer treatment. Queen Camilla will likely represent him instead.)

Another source, a former Buckingham Palace staffer, told The Daily Beast that Easter was “the natural choice” for Kate to make her return to the public sphere. The former courtier said that attending the Easter Day church service at Sandringham with her family would provide a “powerful dose of continuity.”

They said they understood it was unlikely that there would be a social media campaign featuring Kate—last seen in public on Dec. 25, 2023—or that her team would release any more images of Kate before Easter.

The former courtier added that she is now expected to delegate the business of photographing her family for media handouts to professional photographers, after another image taken by Kate of the late Queen Elizabeth II was struck out of official records by the photo agency Getty Images which declared it had been altered. The former courtier, who retains good links with current staff members said: “We won’t be seeing any more official pictures with Kate’s credit. It would just stir the whole story up again. The kids are older now anyway, so it is less of an issue.”

Asked if the reality was that the palace would have little choice now that major picture agencies have said they no longer regard Kensington Palace as a trusted source, the former staffer said: “They could continue to put her pictures out on social media but the point is, they won’t.”

[From The Daily Beast]

Re: the palace-released photos, I said yesterday that I genuinely hope that media agencies dip into their archives and start labeling all of the manipulated photos released by KP for YEARS. This is practically an admission that yeah, they got caught on that too. They thought they could keep sending out manipulated photos forever and no one would say sh-t. That blew up in their faces, as did their lack of preparation for how to keep the public informed about Kate’s condition. Anyway, I’m sure Kate will be resurrected for Easter, or at least that’s what everyone in Windsor World is telling Kate that she has to do. Although, history shows us that whenever pressure is applied on Will and Kate to get off their asses, they refuse.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

Here are some photos of Prince William in London on Tuesday, where he did an event in Sheffield. He went to the “Homewards Sheffield Local Coalition meeting,” and this is all about his Homewards initiative, where he’s “solving homelessness” by giving some grants to local homeless charities and maybe creating some low-income housing in Cornwall. While in Sheffield, he spoke to Kate Joseph, chief executive of Sheffield City Council, who mentioned something about childhood experiences. William was quoted: “That’s my wife’s area. She needs to sit here.” This mention of his wife made national headlines in the UK, because Huevo has bungled this situation so badly. At his previous public events, he refused to make any reference to Kate or her health. Speaking of, there seems to be a steady stream of royal experts criticizing William and Kensington Palace for all of their communications f–kups.

As the best selling royal author Christopher Andersen told The Daily Beast: “Every time Kate pops her head above the parapet, it only serves to remind us that we still don’t know what the hell is going on. Throwing gas on the fire every few days is no way to put it out.”

Rumor or not, the idea of a sit-down interview with the BBC must have crossed the minds of Kate’s staff as one way to definitively end the speculation. However, one reputation and crisis manager, who asked not to be named, told The Daily Beast: “I deal in outcomes, so I wouldn’t advise doing an interview with the BBC because interviews with royals on the BBC have not gone well in the past. The truth is that the correct thing to do entirely depends on what is wrong with her. If, for example, it is a hysterectomy, as has been widely rumored, it might make sense to do an interview with a newspaper explaining what was wrong with her.”

“It would also be sensible to release the originals of the Mother’s Day photographs. That would go a long way towards re-establishing trust. Don’t forget that, on the plus side, they do now seem to have both the Sun and the Mail on-side, basically saying, ‘She’s fine, leave her alone.’ That is a huge part of the British press and it’s no small accomplishment. They might decide to stick to Plan A, ignore the social media stuff, have her appear on Easter Sunday and hope it all goes away.”

[From The Daily Beast]

The idea that Kate would actually deign to do a sit-down interview is a pipe dream. She’s not doing that! Nor should she, honestly. If this whole thing is about “protecting Kate,” then they shouldn’t have to prep her for days/weeks to answer questions and add to all of her stress. Of course, it’s not clear to me that William actually gives a sh-t about protecting Kate – he and his staff were happy to toss her under the bus for the Mother’s Day photo fiasco, so that certainly wasn’t about protecting her.

Robert Jobson also wrote a curious piece in the Mail, all about how William and Kate are handling everything brilliantly – such mystery, such magic! – except he also points out that William was wrong to pull out of King Constantine’s memorial so abruptly and William has been wrong to be so furtive and secretive. Jobson even writes: “William and Kate are the stars of the Royal Family now and will be in the future. After a series of own-goals, there is less cause for confidence elsewhere, however. This has not been the British Monarchy’s finest hour.” Jobson’s Buckingham Palace sources are telling him that this is purely a KP problem, but Jobson points out that the credibility of the entire British monarchy has been damaged by KP’s shenanigans. Anyway, the piece is overwrought but gently critical, and I think that’s significant.

Photos courtesy of Cover Images.

Here in America, I think people have a healthy sense of privacy and most Americans have a sense of “that’s not any of my business.” Like, we have a healthy curiosity (sometimes an unhealthy curiosity), but we generally believe that everyone has a right to privacy, especially medical privacy. There are also laws governing who can access medical records. We have HIPAA and the UK has similar regulations about private data. That being said, as an American, it’s unthinkable to me that someone like the Princess of Wales could have major abdominal surgery and no one saw her come in or out of the hospital and no one in the hospital leaked anything about her two-week hospital stay. Like, in America, someone would have sold some info about a VIP. A nurse, a tech, hell even a doctor, they would have sold some info to TMZ or made a TikTok for clout or something. The thing is, it’s the same way in the UK – VIPs are constantly having their medical information sold out in the press. It’s been more than a month and a half since Kate left the London Clinic (allegedly) and we still haven’t heard one thing about her mysterious hospital stay. Apparently, a staff member at the London Clinic did try to access Kate’s records though!!

The world renowned hospital where the Princess of Wales was treated has launched an investigation over claims staff attempted to access her private medical records. Bosses have launched a probe into the claims Kate’s confidentiality was breached while she was a patient in The London Clinic in January. At least one member of staff was said to have been caught trying to access the 42-year-old’s notes. The allegations has sent shock waves through the hospital in ­Marylebone, Central London, which has a reputation for discreetly treating of the royal family, former presidents, PMs and celebrities.

One insider revealed: “This is a major security breach and incredibly damaging for the hospital, given its unblemished reputation for treating members of the Royal Family. Senior hospital bosses contacted Kensington Palace immediately after the incident was brought to their attention and assured the palace there would be a full investigation. The whole medical staff have been left utterly shocked and distraught over the allegations and were very hurt that a trusted colleague could have allegedly been responsible for such a breach of trust and ethics.”

The probe comes after comes as video and pictures emerged this week of Kate and Prince William at a farm shop in Windsor, amid conspiracy theories being churned out by internet trolls about her absence since having an abdominal operation. It is a criminal offence for any staff in an NHS or private healthcare setting to access the medical records of a patient without the consent of the organisation’s data controller. The Metropolitan Police did not confirm whether it had been informed of the allegations.

The London clinic refused to comment on the claims but said: “We firmly believe that all our patients, no matter their status, deserve total privacy and confidentiality regarding their medical information.” The hospital informed the Palace of the alleged breach as soon as it was discovered, sources said. Kensington Palace said: “This is a matter for The London Clinic.”

Kate is understood to have been made aware of the alleged incident. Kate, who has been recovering at home in Windsor since she was discharged from the hospital on January 29 after 13 nights there, has chosen not to reveal the reason she was admitted.

[From The Daily Mirror]

Again, I know it’s none of my business and Kate has the right to medical privacy, the same as anyone else. But I would absolutely be curious to learn the exact dates of when she was checked in and how many times William visited her, because I get the feeling people told a lot of lies about both of those subjects. I would assume, given the nature of the British press, that the person who tried to access Kate’s records was probably going to sell the information to one of the tabloids. Don’t you think? Perhaps one of the tabloids even contacted the person and asked him or her to specifically access Kate’s records.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

Dakota Johnson has an interesting interview with Bustle, and my first thought was “wow, quick turnaround from Madame Web bombing at the box office.” While she does get into the Madame Web catastrophe, the point of this interview is Dakota promoting her production company and her new book club, TeaTime Book Club. It’s yet another side-gig for Dakota, and it feels like she’s trying to go for the Reese Witherspoon route of starting a production company and book club to find properties to buy and produce. Dakota is not online and she would rather be sitting in her beach house reading a good book or spending time with artists and her family. Some highlights from this Bustle piece:

She’s a beach person: “I live way out by the beach, out in Malibu. I need to be in nature. I can be out at my house and not see or speak to another human for days on end, and I feel wonderful.”

Her book club is different: “There are a lot of people who do things like I do and they have book clubs, and I was always like, Oh, the way that I read books, it’s so different. I want to fall down the rabbit hole every time I read… to invest in the book, invest in the language, invest in the references. Like, Oh, what is that piece of art she’s talking about? Who’s that musician?” I’ve found in book clubs that you’re just kind of on your own. You watch someone like me have a conversation with the author, but I don’t feel invested in that.”

Press tours are ridiculous: “Publicly… all that stuff is ridiculous. It’s hard for me to fake it. It’s hard for me sometimes to go along with the silliness of doing a press tour. I had the LA premiere for Madame Web and then went to Mexico City. I had pneumonia and was on steroids and the nebulizer and doing all these little things, and I was really, really sick and felt horrible. I looked horrible. I was like, Ugh. And then the movie came out and it was… Like, I can’t take any of it seriously at all. I dunno.

The critical reaction to Madame Web: “Unfortunately, I’m not surprised that this has gone down the way it has. It’s so hard to get movies made, and in these big movies that get made — and it’s even starting to happen with the little ones, which is what’s really freaking me out — decisions are being made by committees, and art does not do well when it’s made by committee. Films are made by a filmmaker and a team of artists around them. You cannot make art based on numbers and algorithms. My feeling has been for a long time that audiences are extremely smart, and executives have started to believe that they’re not. Audiences will always be able to sniff out bullsh*t. Even if films start to be made with AI, humans aren’t going to f*cking want to see those.

Her thoughts now that ‘Madame Web’ is over: “It was definitely an experience for me to make that movie. I had never done anything like it before. I probably will never do anything like it again because I don’t make sense in that world. And I know that now. But sometimes in this industry, you sign on to something, and it’s one thing and then as you’re making it, it becomes a completely different thing, and you’re like, Wait, what? But it was a real learning experience, and of course it’s not nice to be a part of something that’s ripped to shreds, but I can’t say that I don’t understand.

On the Puriteens questioning the need for sex scenes in movies: “I feel like people get up in arms about things just to be up in arms about things. This culture of hating — it’s so boring. Because you know those people who are like, “Why is there a sex scene in it?,” are going to go home and watch p0rn. If there’s a sex scene that feels gratuitous and out of context, then yeah, say that. But if it’s part of the story and it makes sense, what are you going to say? It’s also like, can everyone just f*cking relax and stop judging each other so hard? Everyone’s doing their best. I mean some people are not. Some people are really doing their absolute worst and we see you.

Being in love with a musician: “I love me a musician. I think it’s talent. I think it’s the way that they see the world. But I think it really depends on the musician. I’ve known some sh-tty ones. I love watching [Chris Martin on stage]. I could watch him every day. I don’t know how to explain it. I feel like, I don’t know… I’m watching my most favorite being do his most favorite thing. When people are really good at things, it is [sexy.] Except being a dictator.

She refers to Chris’s kids as her stepkids: “I think as long as you’re not hurting anyone physically, emotionally, psychologically, do you. I like that people are exploring existence and how to relate to other people. My stepson had a friend who was saying that at her school, some kids are identifying as cats. And I was like, OK, good for you.

Being a stepmom: “I love those kids like my life depends on it. With all my heart.”

She loves to lie in interviews: “The most fun. The most fun. Sometimes when you’re in a ridiculous situation, you just have to be ridiculous.

[From Bustle]

I was prepared to hate on her Madame Web answers, but she handled that really well. She telegraphed all of that during the publicity tour as well, that the thing she signed up for was not the thing which was made. Too many cooks in the kitchen, too many executives putting their two cents in, etc. Some of MW’s failure will fall on Dakota’s shoulders, but she won’t own it solely. A lot of people made a lot of bad decisions.

As for the rest of it… it’s interesting that she refers to Chris’s kids as her stepkids! We’ve known for a while that Dakota and Gwyneth are fine with each other, and Dakota and Apple Martin have been photographed together too. I can’t imagine what it’s like to navigate all of that. I also wonder if Chris will be mad that Dakota talked about him in an interview. She usually avoids all of that.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images, Backgrid.

Richard Simmons sent the interwebs into a frenzy on Monday when he tweeted that he was dying. You see, the public mistakenly took that to mean… that he was dying. But he’s not! Well, he is, in the sense that “we all are dying,” as he further said in his post. But the point is he is not presently dying. He just wanted to inspire us all to seize the day and take care of our health. And he never meant to cause upset or confusion by posting a nuanced message on Twitter that could have ambiguous interpretations. Are we clear now?

Richard Simmons got social media users working up a sweat.

The beloved fitness personality — who rose to fame in the 1970s and ‘80s thanks to his eccentric and energetic personality and his accessible at-home “Sweatin’ to the Oldies” line of aerobics videos — posted a cryptic message Monday on X, formerly Twitter, that confused and concerned a lot of users.

“I have some news to tell you. Please don’t be sad. I am …dying,” Simmons began his post. “Oh I can see your faces now. The truth is we all are dying. Every day we live we are getting closer to our death. Why am I telling you this?”

Although some wrote off the post as just a joke — especially since Simmons followed up that tweet with a thread of health tips — its wording never specifies whether Simmons is just trying to make light of the fleetingness of life or an actual life-threatening diagnosis.

It was especially bewildering because Richards has been reclusive from public life since 2014, as was pointed out in Dan Taberski’s popular 2017 podcast, “Missing Richard Simmons.”

The tweet even seemed to confuse media outlets that reached out to Simmons’ reps to verify whether or not the 75-year-old aerobics instructor was in good health.

The tweet seemed to cause such a fiasco that hours later, Simmons tweeted a clarification.

“Sorry many of you have gotten upset about my message today. Even the press has gotten in touch with me,” Simmons wrote. “I am not dying. It was a message about saying how we should embrace every day that we have. Sorry for this confusion.”

Tom Estey, a spokesman for Simmons, clarified to CNN that Simmons is fine.

“I can confirm with one hundred percent certainty that Richard is not dying,” Estey told CNN. “He’s, in fact, very healthy and happy. The sole purpose of the post was meant to be inspirational.”

[From HuffPost]

To be fair to Richard, a quick perusal of his Twitter shows that he routinely posts inspirationally-styled messages. So his explanation about Monday’s tweet makes sense when taken in the context of all his be-good-to-yourself tweets. Furthermore, Richard has been mainly a private person for the past 10 years. He doesn’t want the spotlight these days. He just wants to drop into people’s feeds here and there to remind everyone to give themselves a hug, or relay the all-plot, no-drama story of how he bought his first Barbra Streisand record. With this particular tweet, Richard’s words and tone didn’t make sense on the platform the way they did in his head. And then Twitter did what Twitter does. I hope Richard dusts off his spandex and keeps sharing his somewhat random yet overall positive anecdotes.

All that said, did I miss a horoscope reading foretelling that Monday March 18 would be a day to fact check death announcements? Cause that sounds more like some Ides of March sh*t to me! The day began with King Charles III being cast out by a (likely) Russian disinformation campaign, and then Fitness King Richard the First fell on the sword (of his own words). I’m dubbing it the Ides of Twitter. Beware!!

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photos credit: Getty and Optic Photos, PacificCoastNews / Avalon, Dominic Chan / Wenn / Avalon