I need to practise this f-ck you face (Dlisted)

Ashton Kutcher is trying to learn Russian. Does your face look like mine right now? (Just Jared)

Do you think he’ll be back in 6 months or will he be hosting a Kardashian aftershow? (The Superficial)

My Obsession talks about …      

I felt bad going after Jupiter Ascending because while it’s a deeply flawed film, at least the Wachowskis showed some ambition and sincerity in making it. Click here for my review. I don’t feel bad at all about crapping on Seventh Son because it’s a cynical piece of cinematic ga…      

The Grammys saluted Stevie Wonder last night at a special performance in LA featuring several big name artists all gathered to honour the legend. The show will air on February 16 on CBS.

In addition to Gladys Knight, Annie Lennox, Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga, John Legend, the Band Perry, Jamie…      

Jamie Dornan reads lines of E.L. James‘ crappy dialogue in random accents for Jimmy Kimmel. Go here to watch —> [A Socialite Life]
Leonardo DiCaprio “moved on” from Rihanna with a model. [Dlisted]
Gwyneth Paltrow fudges her conscious uncoupling timeline. [LaineyGossip]
Eddie Redmayne doesn’t wear spanx on the red carpet. [Buzzfeed]
Zach Braff isn’t racist. He’s simply an idiot. [Pajiba]
Margot Robbie‘s technical Oscars dress is fug. [Go Fug Yourself]
Snooki won’t post photos of her kids anymore. Really? [Starcasm]
Lady Gaga doesn’t want to talk about her engagement. [OMG Blog]
Will Smith is sad no one wanted to watch After Earth. [Evil Beet]
Megan Fox wears jeans, sparks envy everywhere. [Popoholic]
Lisa Rinna wants RHOBH stars to “own their sh*t.” [Reality Tea]
Miley Cyrus is really into Patrick Schwarzenegger. [ICYDK]
Miley Cyrus pulled out of that pr0n film festival [Jezebel]
Ali Larter introduces baby Vivienne Margaret. [Celebrity Baby Scoop]

Screencaps courtesy of YouTube; photo courtesy of WENN

Yessss. This is how you do a sequel. You push so hard into the deep sequeliness of it that you go Malkovich on your own movie.

I read once that sequels are whore’s movies. That is, you make the first one for the love of the story. You make the second one because the first one, surprisin…      

The Academy confirmed yesterday that Jennifer Aniston will present at the Oscars. A presenter… but not a nominee.

Gracious to accept the invitation on her part, sure. But, really, what choice did she have? If she declined, she’d look to them like a petty asshole, and they’d…      

What are your thoughts on Scarlett Johansson’s high-fashion mullet? She comes dangerously close to pulling it off. This whole W Magazine shoot – by Mert & Marcus – is very 1980s punk rock, I guess. There are worse styling choices, and as I said, it kind of works on Scarlett. I get tired of magazine stylists just doing her up like Marilyn Monroe or just “indiscriminate blonde bombshell.” You can see ScarJo’s full editorial here, and here are some highlights from the interview:

On her daughter Rose: “When she came out of me, I was so surprised. I had a very strong picture in my mind of what my baby would look like. And, of course, she is completely different. Perfect, but not what I’d imagined. Now, of course, I can’t picture her any other way.”

When offered a private changing room during the shoot: “Everyone has seen my breasts! I can change my top right here.”

Her role as a seductive alien in Under the Skin: “She was a totally different species, so her nudity was kind of practical. I also had black hair. That was my idea—I didn’t think I should be a blonde sort of bombshell. Naked, but not too sexy.”

She always had a husky voice: “When I was young, I would talk and everyone thought I had a cold. But when I went out for films, they loved my voice. It was a different world.”

She always wanted to do voice work for a cartoon: “I actually visited Pixar, hoping that they would use me for a cartoon. They didn’t. I was ripe for the picking! What happened? Now they have to give me a cartoon! I just called them out.”

Playing Black Widow: “People were surprised that I wanted to play a comic book heroine. But I loved Iron Man, and I met with Marvel to see what was possible. I had done my research, and the Black Widow character resonated with me. She is dark and has faced death so many times that she has a deep perspective on the value of life. In the sequel, you learn more about the sadness in her past. I think of her that way. Black Widow is a superhero, but she’s also human. She’s small, but she’s strong. It’s hard not to admire her. She packs a big punch. We all try to fight the forces of evil. Like Black Widow, you have to keep trying. The challenge is always there.”

[From W Magazine]

It’s funny that she associates darker hair with taking down the sexiness. For some men, I guess that’s the case. But lots of dudes dig brunettes, you know? As for her famous voice and how she’s never done a cartoon… that IS weird. She did all of that voice work on Her, which earned her a lot of praise, but it’s weird that no animated film producer has ever wanted her to voice a character. Oh, and as for her baby not looking like she expected… I’m assuming Rose is a brunette then? The horror!

Photos courtesy of Mert & Marcus/W Magazine.

Justified Season 6, Episode 4 recap

In its final season, Justified is firing on all cylinders. This episode has everything—Raylan in tense stand-offs, apple pie moonshine, dumb*ss criminals getting themselves killed, Wynn Duffy and Boyd Crowder bantering, Gutterson. It’s just abou…      

As posted yesterday (click here for a refresher), it’s Angelina Jolie Pitt now, official.

Here are some shots of her in London on Tuesday arriving at a meeting with William Hague, all business following the announcement of the launch of the Centre for Women, Peace and Security at the Lo…      

Who looks worse, Kim or Khloe Kardashian? The sisters were out and about in NYC last night, attending the launch of Kardashian Beauty Hair (don’t ask me, I don’t know or care). Kim poured herself into a too-tight white two-piece dress (which looks a lot like Scheana Marie’s wedding two-piece) while Khloe wore a Mugler ensemble (pants and blouse) with a Chanel clutch. And her Pinocchio Butt, of course. Between the two of them, I think Khloe is wearing her ensemble with more confidence, but Kim actually looks better. Khloe’s butt implants just throw off the entire ensemble.

What else is going on? Not much, really. An insider told Radar that Kanye West is responsible for Kim’s great new haircut, but that Kim hates her new look. The insider says:

“Kim’s hair had been badly damaged because of the extensions, and Kanye ordered her hair stylist to remove them, because he wanted her to have an edgier look. The extensions also required a lot of maintenance, and Kim complained about the time it took. While Kanye loves Kim’s new hairstyle, she just isn’t feeling it at all. She doesn’t feel sexy, and thinks the short hair makes her look frumpy. Adding to the fact that she recently gained about fifteen pounds, Kim just isn’t feeling great about her body…Kim is already telling friends, she hopes to have the extensions back in very soon. Kanye won’t be happy about it, but Kim will say she had to for professional reasons.”

[From Radar]

This wouldn’t surprise me at all. Kanye is always styling his Real Doll in new ways, and I will easily believe he stage-managed her haircut. I think it was a good call too, but yeah, Kim probably hates it.

More pics from last night…

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.