Up until recently I’ve been laughing along bemusedly at the Stanley cup craze. But now I’m starting to get nervous that it’s a bad omen for an election year. Quick recap: TikTok has bewitched the masses into losing their ever-loving minds over the $45 Stanley Quencher. Which is a water bottle. That’s it! Maybe it’s just because the caucuses have begun and I’m projecting all my fears onto the public’s vehement selection of a water bottle that I patently don’t understand the zealotry over. And speaking of, police arrested a woman in Sacramento for stealing 65 Stanley cups from one store, about $2,500 worth of merchandise. Please let the madness stop

The craze for Stanley stainless steel drinking cups reached new levels last week when a woman was arrested for allegedly stealing 65 of them, worth almost $2,500, from a store in California.

Police in Roseville, Placer County, northeast of Sacramento, said Sunday that they were called to a reported theft from a store on Stanford Ranch Road in the city on January 17.

“Staff saw a woman take a shopping cart full of Stanley water bottles without paying for them. The suspect refused to stop for staff and stuffed her car with the stolen merchandise,” police said in a statement on Facebook.

“An officer spotted the suspect vehicle as it entered Highway 65 from Galleria Blvd and initiated a traffic stop,” the statement said.

The so-far unnamed woman, 23, from Sacramento, was arrested for grand theft. Pictures released by police show her car trunk and passenger seat stuffed with a variety of cups.

Stanley cups have become highly-sought items in recent months, thanks to a trend driven by social media influencers. The “Quencher” cup, which holds 40 fluid ounces and retails on the Stanley website at $45, has in particular become a fashionable item.

“While Stanley Quenchers are all the rage, we strongly advise against turning to crime to fulfill your hydration habits,” police said.

[From NBC News]

OK here’s where I’m struggling, aside from the fact that we’re still just talking about stainless steel water bottles: the store employees see this woman with 65 Stanleys in her shopping cart, they ask her to stop but she refuses, loads up her car, and drives away. Was it not possible to detain her while she was transferring the cups from cart to car? Please educate me! Because right now I’m just imagining myself as the thief and… yeah I would totally be apprehendable in the act of moving 65 water bottles into my car. The maneuver would be neither smooth nor swift. Plus I’m a responsible shopping cart user and would be simply unable to leave the parking lot without returning the cart to one of the designated stations. Thieves can have manners too, you know. Anyway, I applaud the police for not only stopping the theft in action, but even more so for issuing the superbly dry statement: “we strongly advise against turning to crime to fulfill your hydration habits.” No notes.