Christina Aguilera in Marc Bouwer at the VF Oscar party: pretty or try-hard?

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Do you remember that giraffe print gown that Piper Perabo wore to her funky wedding, which turned out to be a Michael Kors dress which both Jennifer Lopez and Naomi Campbell had worn on the red carpet before? That’s what I thought Christina Aguilera was wearing here, to the Vanity Fair Oscar party last night. This dress has a higher neck, a wider print, and it’s white and nude, not silver and nude or black and nude as we saw in the Kors version, which I liked way better. This is a pale imitation of the earlier dress, it looks cheap and it’s not that flattering. I would say Aguilera can do better, but that’s debatable.

Here’s Jessica Chastain, also in sparkly white, in H&M Conscious Collection. (Chastain switched it up from her Givenchy gown for the ceremony.) The hemline is so bad and those shoes are Jimmy Choo but they look like Aldo. Cheap. I checked with the H&M people (ok I chatted with a person online while shopping on their website) and they told me the dress is “no longer available” as it “is actually an older item which will not be coming back, unfortunately.”

2015 Vanity Fair Oscar Party

She looks pretty from the waist up and at least she put waves in her hair for the after party. It was looking limp at the Oscars.

2015 Vanity Fair Oscar Party

I don’t have a designer ID for Jaime King’s gold brocade v-neck gown, but I remember that she just announced her second pregnancy, on Twitter. She didn’t look pregnant to me at all from the front but from the side she has a very noticeable bump.

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Patricia Clarkson slayed it in a white formfitting full length dress with a criss-cross bodice. This lady is 55 years old and she does not look pulled or tucked or lasered, just amazing.

87th Annual Oscars - Vanity Fair Oscar Party

Speaking of older women looking incredible, here’s Jane Fonda, rocking another pantsuit, this one with sequins. It could do without the witchy silver shoes, but you work it, Jane.

87th Annual Oscars - Vanity Fair Oscar Party