True story: last week, I realized that I would probably need to know what I was talking about with the Fifty Shades of Grey sequel, Fifty Shades Darker, so I just ordered the second and third books over the weekend. I read the first one a few years ago and I hated it so much that I swore I wouldn’t finish the trilogy. But anything for the job, right? I will hate-read the books. And then I will hate-read the new book E.L. James has written. She just announced that a new Christian Grey will be released on June 18, which is Christian Grey’s birthday (for the love of God…). It will be the same story (??) told through Christian’s perspective.

And the saga continues. Author E. L. James will be releasing a new “Fifty Shades of Grey” novel written from character Christian Grey’s point of view. The book, titled “Grey,” will be published on June 18 — Grey’s birthday. James has dedicated the book “to those readers who asked… and asked… and asked… and asked for this.”

“Christian is a complex character and readers have always been fascinated by his desires and motivations, and his troubled past,” James said in a press release. “Also, as anyone who has ever been in a relationship knows, there are two sides to every story. It’s been a great pleasure to return to my happy place-writing, being with Christian and Ana in their universe, and working with the fantastic team at Vintage.”

“Grey” will be published in paperback and as an eBook by Vintage Books, an imprint of the Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group — a division of Penguin Random House.

“Fifty Shades of Grey is a love story that has enthralled readers in a way that few books have,” said Vintage Books publisher and James’ editor, Anne Messitte. “When Erika mentioned to me that she wanted to explore Christian’s viewpoint and re-open the story, I was incredibly excited for her and for her readers. This book has all the compelling attributes of its predecessors, and I can’t wait for Fifty Shades fans to experience the work again from a perspective they have long desired.”

[From Variety]

Let me translate Anne Messitte’s statement: “It shocked me that EL’s drivel actually made so much money, so we’ve all schemed for a way to make even more money, because pandering to the desires of stupid people has made us all rich!!” I wonder if Christian Grey’s narration involves a lot of crying over nothing, references to inner goddesses and “down there.” I wonder if Christian is just as ridiculous as Anastasia, basically. He would have to be. In my mind, E.L. James wrote this in a month and the editor “proofread” it after ten tequila shots.

Photos courtesy of WENN.