When we last checked in with Lindsay Lohan, the crack-monster had arrived in Brooklyn three days after she was supposed to. She checked into a hotel close to the Brooklyn Community Center where she was going to try to complete her court-ordered community service. Her first real day of “work” was last Wednesday, when the Cracken showed up TWO HOURS LATE. She arranged to get pap’d outside the community center too, and she was holding a Koran. All in all, it was an entirely predictable cracked-out mess. And she has to keep it up for another two weeks, full-time, if she’s going to put a big enough dent into her community service hours and “avoid jail.” That’s the threat coming from the LA court – this is her last chance to complete her hours and if she doesn’t stick with it, she’ll go to jail. No one really believes that Los Angeles County would actually throw her into jail, but the threat has scared Lindsay enough that she’s come up with a Plan B. Plan B = run away to Monaco. Hahahaha.

Lindsay Lohan vows to become a fugitive from justice and will flee to Monaco if she doesn’t complete her community service on time. We know Lindsay is keenly aware of the looming May 28th deadline, and she knows there’s a real chance she won’t complete her required hours. We also know she’s been told she’s going to jail if she falls short, and this time she actually believes it.

So Lindsay has made it clear to friends and family … if she doesn’t get it done, she won’t go back to California for her court hearing. She says a very rich friend has a hotel in Monaco and has given her carte blanche to stay indefinitely, and she’ll take him up on the offer.

Thing is … she can’t be extradited for a reckless driving misdemeanor, so authorities can’t touch her. In the unlikely event she actually completes her community service on time, she says she’ll gladly go to court, but then it’s definitely off to Monaco. Drive safely, Monaco residents.

[From TMZ]

I would LOVE to hear more about this “very rich friend” who owns a hotel in Monaco. I would love to know just how Lindsay still maintains her friendships with wealthy men, given that she’s an utter mess and I doubt she can even handle paying in “trade.” But sure… if Lindsay becomes a fugitive from justice in Monaco… that would be a crazy end to this cracked-out rollercoaster of crack shenanigans.

Hey, maybe Lindsay can find work in Monaco as a nanny to Kelly Rutherford’s kids. Too soon? Haha.

Photos of Lindsay in NYC on May 15, 2015 courtesy of Pacific Coast News.