John Oliver convinced bakery to put his face on bear cakes in exchange for ovens

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Bear with me for a moment (that turn of phrase is going to be hilarious in a minute) while I set the scene for John Oliver’s latest shenanigan. Last week on Last Week Tonight, Oliver ended the show by announcing — and displaying on set — that he had bought at auction the entire furnishings of a recently-closed Red Lobster in upstate New York. This week on Last Week Tonight, Oliver had an unexpected follow up. Turns out a bakery neighbor of the dearly departed Red Lobster had been hoping to snag their equipment, and had lamented to local news about Oliver swooping in to purchase all the wares. So Oliver issued a counteroffer: put my face on your bear-shaped cakes, and you can have your ovens. Guess whose face is now on several dozen bear cakes?!

The bakery had asked for the ovens via a handwritten note taped to Red Lobster’s door: On his show Sunday, Oliver joked about how Deising’s Bakery and Restaurant owner Eric Deising had asked the restaurant for a 36-inch flat grill/oven and a commercial kitchen convection oven. “OK, first, with all due respect, if you wanted equipment from that Red Lobster, leaving a note on the door is a weird way to get it,” Oliver said, per the Hollywood Reporter. “The restaurant just closed down. It’s like going to a cemetery and leaving a note on a tombstone that says, ‘Hey, can I have your socks?’”

‘I want to be a cake bear’: [Oliver] said the show had already donated the Red Lobster equipment — but he would provide replacements if there was a “baked good with my face on it on sale in your bakery, specifically a cake bear with my face on it. … As long as it fits the general description of ‘John Oliver Cake Bear,’ I’ll be more than happy,” he said. “So that is my offer. And because I know that the normal way of asking for things isn’t really your style, I’ve written this offer on a piece of paper like this that is currently taped to the door of your bakery.” “Please do say yes because we’ve already bought the equipment. It is right here waiting to be delivered to you,” Oliver said, revealing the equipment, with red bows tied around it. “The bear is in your court, Deising’s Bakery,” he said. “Make me a cake bear. I want to be a cake bear.”

The cakes sold out the first day, will be available all week: The bakery accepted the challenge, creating an Oliver cake, along with Oliver cupcakes that sold out on Monday, the Daily Freeman reports. “I was so pleasantly surprised to come in this morning with this lovely note on the door,” said Peter Deising, the owner’s son. In a Facebook post, the bakery said mini Oliver cake bears will be sold all week, with the proceeds going to a local food pantry.

[From Newser]

This man (and his show) giveth and giveth and giveth to global mirth-by-way-of-mischief, and I am so here for it! Just to underscore the point, Last Week Tonight had already donated all their Red Lobster equipment — and Oliver said the two ovens the bakery wanted weren’t part of the inventory, anyway — so they went out and bought two shiny, brand new ovens to give away. In exchange for John Oliver-visaged bear cakes. It’s a win for the bakery, and a win for the world! And good on the bakery for donating the Oliver Bear proceeds to a local food pantry. (Sidenote: I know Oliver has a tense relationship with the HBO lawyers, but what do the accountants say?! Can you imagine the meetings going over all the line items?)

It took Deising’s Bakery less than a day from the episode airing to the creation of those chocolate, decadent, rubenesque bear cakes, and there are so many artistic choices they made that impressed me. I have to admit, when Oliver first threw down the challenge, in my head I started imagining a caricature of his features rendered in frosting. I wasn’t expecting they’d go the route of an actual (and edible, I presume!) photo of his face. But then, the nose. The frosting button nose they dolloped on his mug, I mean come ON! Diesing’s is proudly showing off their superb confections online, including a snap of a baker holding the handwritten note Oliver’s team left for them. I implore you all to zoom in on that image to read the email address listed. IYKYK.