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Darius Rucker’s memoir, titled Life’s Too Short, came out on Tuesday, May 28. In the book, Darius talks about his painful childhood, forming and leaving Hootie & the Blowfish, his country music career, years of heavy drug use, and more. There’s also stories of famous friends he met along the way. One of the stories Darius includes in the memoir involves Woody Harrelson saving his life. 25 years ago, Darius visited Woody in Hawaii and the two of them, along with a third friend named Kirk, decided to make a “treacherous descent” down a cliff to swim at a small beach. Unfortunately, Darius, Woody, and Kirk got more adventure than they’d bargained for when Darius got caught up in a rip current.

“At Woody’s, if you want to go swimming, you don’t simply slip on your trunks and dive into the pool. Way more complicated than that. We begin our swim by climbing down a jagged cliff — very slowly and carefully, inch by inch,” Rucker, 58, wrote in the first chapter of his Life’s Too Short memoir, released on Tuesday, May 28, recalling a two-week stretch where he stayed with Harrelson in Hawaii.

After a “treacherous 25-minute descent” they reached a small beach. Rucker, Harrelson and a third friend, Kirk, decided to go swimming.

“I’m better than a decent swimmer. I’m a strong, confident swimmer,” Rucker wrote, but the Hawaiian water made him think otherwise. After losing sight of Harrelson and Kirk — plus any land — Rucker remembered getting pulled under by a rip current.

“The current is ferocious. I feel as if some horrific giant squid has lashed itself around my body, circling and tightening its tentacles around my legs, dragging me under the water. I gulp and I gasp and I keep fighting,” Rucker writes. “I fight and flail for I have no idea how long — ten minutes, fifteen — and then I hear a voice. Woody. I can’t see him, but I hear him. He’s not far.”

Eventually, Harrelson caught up to Rucker in the water. Together, the two of them floated until Rucker felt himself “drifting away.” The singer told Harrelson to let him go after seeing “a blinding blast of white” and various visions of his late mother.

“The words leak out of my mouth, one at a time, each syllable a tiny jab of air, causing me to gasp. I blow out a final burst of words. ‘This is it,’” Rucker wrote. Harrelson, refusing to let his friend die, found Kirk in the water and they saved Rucker.

The moments between being saved and making their way back to the beach are “blank,” Rucker wrote. “All I know for sure is that somehow Woody pulls me out of the current and he and Kirk drag me back to the beach because here I am, twenty-five years later,” he shared.

Elsewhere in the chapter, Rucker said he doesn’t recall the origin of his friendship with Harrelson but after meeting, they “hit it off” immediately.

“Truth is, everybody wants to be friends with Woody,” Rucker wrote. “He’s kind, generous, fun, and mellow.”

[From US Weekly]

That sounds so terrifying. Thank goodness Darius wasn’t swimming out there alone and that Woody and Kirk were able to save him. Rip currents are no joke. I love swimming in the ocean but I’ll freely admit that it scares the crap out of me on some level every time. PSA since it’s about to be beach season: If you’re ever caught up in a rip tide, don’t fight against it! That was Darius’ mistake. If you’re not a strong swimmer, float with it. If you are a good swimmer, swim parallel to the shore until you’re out of the current and then work your way back to the shore at an angle away from the current. I bet Woody was yelling at Darius to stop fighting it because it sounds like once he reached him, he knew to float until they were out of it. Again, thank goodness he was there and knew what to do to help Darius out.

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photos credit: Judy Eddy/Cover Images and Getty

As I’ve noted a few times this week, we’re seeing a new strategy unfold in real time with the mysterious disappearance of the Princess of Wales. Kate has not been credibly seen in public in over five months, although palace sources seem especially keen to run around, claiming that Kate has been out and about and running errands in recent days. The Mail’s Richard Eden got that tip last week, then the Mail’s Becky English got the same information, then People Magazine and Us Weekly ran suspiciously similar stories about “Kate is out of the house, we can report exclusively!” Well, it looks like Katie Nicholl was also on the same email chain, because Nicholl has returned to Vanity Fair with this exclusive:

Following reports that Kate Middleton has been seen out and about with her family in recent days, speculation has turned to when the princess will return to official engagements.

Reports claiming that Princess Kate is unlikely to be back at work until next year are inaccurate, sources tell Vanity Fair, and while the Daily Mail has reported that Kate could be back as soon as this autumn, no official return date has been planned.

VF has been told that Kate is in no hurry to return to work, with her focus being entirely on her recovery. According to one well-placed source, “There is no timeline, and there is certainly no hurry. It will be when Catherine feels ready and when she gets the greenlight from her medical team. But she will 100% be coming back to work, of that there is no question.”

Princess Kate has not participated in an official public engagement since Christmas Day. Her long absence from the spotlight is understood to be one of the reasons that she was keen to deliver the news about her cancer via a video message. According to insiders, Kate wanted people to see that she was doing okay.

Sources close to the princess have told VF that the royal, who is going through a course of preventative chemotherapy, has “turned a corner” with her treatment in recent weeks and is feeling a lot better.

“It has been a great relief that she is tolerating the medication and is actually doing a lot better,” says a family friend. “It has, of course, been a very challenging and worrying time. Everyone has rallied around her—William, her parents, and her sister and brother.”

[From Vanity Fair]

If you ask me, two concurrent events scared the palace: the five-month mark of Kate’s last public sighting and that very strange Daily Beast piece, where sources claimed that Kate probably wouldn’t be seen for all of 2024, and she was being looked after by her “birth family.” I also feel like we’re seeing a Buckingham Palace-versus-Kensington Palace issue. BP took over the messaging on Kate back in March, after KP kept getting caught in lie after lie. I haven’t worked out exactly what is happening, but I’ve seen enough this year to say with confidence that the KP team is not on the same page as the BP team. So… yeah, it’s interesting that “sources” are insisting that Kate won’t be gone all year and that she’s 100% coming back to work.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

Here are some photos of Jennifer Lopez on Tuesday, May 28. She grabbed lunch at the Maybourne Hotel, then went to her Beverly Hills office. Ben was not with her. While Ben and Jen did a few things together last week for their kids/stepkids, Ben also went solo to his daughter Violet’s high school graduation party. I remember hearing, several years ago, that Violet isn’t crazy about J.Lo, but it might have just been a rumor. Backgrid, the photo agency, also claims that J.Lo’s lunch date yesterday was none other than Violet Affleck, so maybe Jennifer took her stepdaughter out to lunch for a graduation treat and an apology for missing Violet’s graduation. Anyway, the vibe around Bennifer is still “up in the air.” Whatever is happening between them, they’re still talking and spending time with each other, but Ben is maintaining a separate home in Brentwood.

Meanwhile, Jennifer’s career these days is a mixed bag. She has yet another streaming hit with Atlas, her poorly-reviewed Netflix movie. The numbers are great though, and clearly, people love that J.Lo makes Prime and Netflix movies that they can watch from the comfort of home. Unfortunately, people do not want to leave the house to support her musical career though. Not only were her concert ticket sales severely underwhelming, but it looks like her reported $90 million Las Vegas residency is in jeopardy too:

Jennifer Lopez was recently in talks for a $90 million Las Vegas residency — but the blockbuster deal now looks shaky at best as her new album and upcoming concert tour are flopping badly, The Post has learned. The embattled pop diva — whose headline-grabbing marriage to Ben Affleck is reportedly crumbling — recently had been in talks with MGM Grand on a guaranteed $1 million a show for 90 dates starting next year, a source close to the situation told The Post.

But casino executives have lately grown skittish over abysmal ticket sales for her first tour in five years following the release of her “This is Me … Now” album in February — with poor demand having forced the cancellation of seven shows this summer, the source said. No Vegas deal has yet to be announced. That’s despite a report from The Mirror on Feb. 2 that MGM had teamed up with Live Nation to offer more than $800,000 a show. Rival casino Resorts World upped the bidding to $875,000 per show in partnership with Anschutz Entertainment Group (AEG) soon after, sources said.

MGM and Live Nation then swooped in with the $1 million-a-show offer for the “Let’s Get Loud” singer — but buyer’s remorse has lately set in, the first source said.

“MGM is watching her not doing well on the road. They are very nervous,” the person said. “It’s pretty rare you have a poor tour and then go to Vegas.”

Now, the Bronx-born star could be looking at a significant haircut to the $90 million windfall. A Lopez residency should fetch just $600,000 to $650,000 and be for fewer shows, the source said. Another source with knowledge of the MGM talks said no deal was ever signed, but discussions have continued.

[From The NY Post]

Here’s the thing – I don’t think it necessarily follows that “if you can’t sell out a tour for an unpopular album, then your Vegas residency will be unpopular too.” People will actually want to see J.Lo in Vegas, for the spectacle of it, for the dancing and for her greatest hits. Like, This Is Me… Now is not a good album and even hardcore J.Lo fans were not supporting that mess. But those fans will come back for a “greatest hits” residency. Waiting for Tonight! Jenny From the Block! I’m Real! Love Don’t Cost A Thing! Let’s Get Loud!

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

The full-length trailer for Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is out and I’m really into it! It looks delightfully weird and the actors look like they’re having a ball. [OMG Blog]
Sofia Richie welcomed a daughter named Eloise. [Hollywood Life]
Bad Bunny & Kendall Jenner had dinner in Miami. [Socialite Life]
Michelle Yeoh’s jewelry is always insane. [LaineyGossip]
Elle Fanning looked gorgeous in Cannes. [RCFA]
Can Furiosa live up to Mad Max: Fury Road? [Pajiba]
Chris Hemsworth got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. [Go Fug Yourself]
Anya Taylor Joy & other celebrities were out for the Monaco Grand Prix. [Just Jared]
Cher performed at the Cannes amfAR gala. [Seriously OMG]
How many Kardashian-Jenners have private planes? [Starcasm]
Amnesia about Donald Trump = Trumpnesia. [Buzzfeed]

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Here are some photos of Prince William and Prince George, attending the FA Cup final on Saturday. William’s favorite team, Aston Villa, lost in the semifinals, much to his disappointment. So William brought George to watch the final between Manchester City and Manchester United. Man U won. William went out on the pitch to hand out the trophy and greet the teams. This is only the second time we’ve seen George in 2024, and both of his public outings have come at football matches. We have not seen Charlotte or Louis publicly since last Christmas, and I do not believe that their birthday portraits were taken recently or even this year.

This outing also came after Prime Minister Rishi Sunak called the general election and Buckingham Palace promptly announced that they were hitting pause on all of their outings throughout the six-week election cycle. King Charles canceled several events, and William canceled some mysterious outing which was supposed to be a surprise. It was weird. As I said before, I actually understand why the Windsors are avoiding charity visits which might draw attention to a “political” issue (homelessness, food insecurity, war, immigration), but on the other hand, it looks like they were desperate for an excuse to avoid work. In William’s case, he only wants to do “work” when it involves celebrities, football or pretending to be a global statesman.

William’s outing also came just days and hours after a renewed conversation about his mysteriously vanished wife. Last week, the Mail’s Richard Eden said his sources were telling him that the Princess of Wales would likely not be seen until this fall. Then the Daily Beast’s sources were like: Kate probably won’t be seen at all this year and oh btw, she’s only being surrounded by her “birth family” these days. Weird weird weird.

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Photos courtesy of Getty.

In my lifetime, various American politicians have suggested a “national service” scheme for young people, often some kind of “mandatory” or volunteer military service or community service. Those schemes rarely go anywhere, although programs like the Peace Corps are still highly competitive (and those successful programs should probably just be expanded). Well, now Britain’s Prime Minister Rishi Sunak is running for reelection by introducing a “national service” scheme for young British people. It probably won’t go anywhere – especially since the Tories will likely face a historic loss in the general election on the 4th of July – but if Sunak’s scheme goes through, it means that young royals would also have to “serve” in the scheme.

Young royals will have to spend a year in the military or volunteer in the community under Conservative plans to revive National Service. Rishi Sunak made the first major policy announcement of the general election campaign on Sunday, vowing to bring back National Service for 18-year-olds. He said this would entail either a year on a military placement or spending one weekend of each month volunteering.

More details have now emerged about the scheme, including that there will be very limited exemptions from participation. The Conservative Party told The Telegraph that this included royal children being expected to take part. The Prince and Princess of Wales have three children, Prince George, 10, Princess Charlotte, 9, and Prince Louis, 6.

Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie also have young children who would be eligible to take part once they reach 18 as well as Prince Edward’s son, the Earl of Wessex, who is 16.

The Royal family has a long history of serving in the military. Prince William attended Sandhurst before spending seven-and-a-half years in full-time military service.

The Tories have also revealed how they plan to encourage teenagers to apply for the military scheme, including participants being potentially favoured when applying for jobs. One option that has been suggested is the introduction of fast-tracked routes into graduate schemes and the civil service for those who have taken part. Another proposal is that employers are encouraged to consider Armed Forces recruits during the hiring process and that participants are given the opportunity to highlight their military experience on their Ucas applications for university and apprenticeships. There will be 30,000 places on the 12-month military scheme each year, and it is hoped that it will be highly competitive.

[From The Telegraph]

Here in America, there are several programs which help employers prioritize military and former military job candidates. It’s sort of a remnant from how poorly veterans were treated post-Vietnam, there was a larger movement to help veterans get jobs, etc. I guess Britain doesn’t have any of that? As for the royal kids ending up in this national service scheme… the Windsors will argue that their lives are dedicated to service anyway, that’s why they live in palaces and castles, because they’re performing a “service” to the British people. Anyway, yeah, none of this is going to happen.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

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This year’s Cannes Film Festival had a weird vibe. I’m saying that from the outside looking in – there was a distinct lack of glamour on the red carpet and a distinct lack of buzz around Cannes. Cannes used to be Harvey Weinstein’s favorite hunting ground, and the film festival organizers have done very little to change the festival’s reputation away from “the festival for predators and abusers.” Things turned especially sour last week when Kelly Rowland was basically shoved off the red carpet by festival security. Several security guards buzzed around her, ruining her photos and refusing to allow her to pose on the steps. Kelly told one of the security guards off, and Kelly later said that she felt like there was racism involved. There was.

Days later, Dominican actress Massiel Taveras was also involved in an incident in Cannes. Just like the Kelly Rowland incident. Massiel was not allowed to simply pose for photographers and unveil her long train. Security once again buzzed around her, blocking photos and attempting to hustle her up the steps. The very same security woman who got told off by Kelly Rowland was there. That security woman put her hands on Massiel and Massiel threw hands right back:

Actress Massiel Taveras had a portrait of Jesus Christ on her dress at the red carpet.

The security guards immediately rushed her out. pic.twitter.com/YFE4pbIU0R

— MatrixUnraveled (@MatrixMysteries) May 26, 2024

The very same security people were also involved with hustling South Korean star Yoona off the carpet and ruining her photos too.

Security guard rushed YoonA out of the carpet at the Cannes Film Festival.

The same security guard was involved in incidents with Kelly Rowland and Massiel Taveras. https://t.co/BW71PS71yN

— Pop Crave (@PopCrave) May 26, 2024

So… what the hell was going on? Why did festival organizers fire these a–holes? Was there a specific mandate to ruin the red carpet for women of color? Why did Cannes organizers not apologize to Kelly, Yoona and Massiel? This is insane. Massiel posted a statement on her social media and she gave a lot of love to Kelly as well.

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Photos courtesy of Massiel’s Instagram.

I have no idea if this month’s polling numbers genuinely reflect the mood of the country, but I genuinely believe two things with all my heart: one, that a lot of stupid people conveniently forget just how evil Donald Trump is and the media should be doing more to remind them; and two, that there a huge swath of American voters who are underrepresented in current polling methodology and that swath of voters f–king hates Donald Trump. Call it a “silent majority” of Americans who despise all things Trump. They are rarely shown in media coverage because Trump and his people carefully stage his rallies and his events so that he’s always kept in a bubble with his unhinged supporters. Bad things happen when he leaves that bubble. Speaking of…

On Saturday, Trump appeared at the Libertarian National Convention and those libertarians were not having any part of his bullsh-t. They greeted him with extreme hostility, and they spent a huge chunk of his speech booing him and heckling him. I was reading Reuters’ coverage and it turns out that libertarians will never support him because they blame HIM for the public health restrictions during the pandemic and for rushing the creation of the Covid vaccine. Which is kind of funny, considering that man was literally telling Americans to inject bleach into their veins to kill the virus. Anyway, this was funny as hell.

Trump’s lies get drowned out with boos at the Libertarian convention pic.twitter.com/Jiy5a0Z3gn

— Biden-Harris HQ (@BidenHQ) May 26, 2024

After getting booed for 20 minutes Trump finally gets pissed and snaps on them. pic.twitter.com/OuB20ksmip

— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) May 26, 2024

No, Donnie, we saw and heard you getting booed BIGLY, and we fucking LOVED it! “The enthusiasm of the crowd” my ass! And saying Kennedy “destroys everything he touches”? That’s YOUR tag! #RickWilson even wrote a book, “Everything Trump Touches Dies”! LOSER! pic.twitter.com/SlSL5w0z2Q

— bettemidler (@BetteMidler) May 27, 2024

Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Cover Images.

Bella Hadid wore Versace to the Cannes red carpet of Beating Hearts. Bella has suddenly looked so much like Carla Bruni to me during Cannes. [RCFA]
Rihanna really is a princess of China. [LaineyGossip]
This man’s terrible Wheel of Fortune guess is going viral. [Seriously OMG]
More photos of Sarah Jessica Parker from the AJLT set. [OMG Blog]
An interview with Jackie Beat. [Socialite Life]
Tom Hiddleston & Zawe Ashton came out to support Tom Holland. [Just Jared]
I love Joel Edgerton but I’m not watching this mess. [Pajiba]
Lily Gladstone, this is not the look. [Go Fug Yourself]
Kathryn Dennis’s DUI meltdown. [Starcasm]
Why are Khloe & Kim Kardashian beefing now? [Hollywood Life]
A rare AITA where I’m on the husband’s side. [Buzzfeed]

I said this months ago on the Gossip with Celebitchy podcast, and it’s still true today: I have yet to come up with one overarching theory for the Princess of Wales’s absence from public life, the contradictory reports on health, the wild briefings from Kensington Palace when they reportedly knew Kate had cancer, the Mother’s Day frankenphoto, the mysterious “sightings” of someone vaguely resembling “Kate,” and the behavior of the Windsors AND the Middletons. Every time I think “oh, I guess this or that is happening,” some other thing doesn’t make sense. So I’m left reading the effects and the appearances. It appears that Buckingham Palace took over Kensington Palace’s clownish comms operation in March. It appears that heaven and earth is being moved to protect William, not Kate. It appears that the Windsors are quite pleased that, within the past two months, they’ve reined in the British media on the subject of Kate and her health. The messaging has been much more disciplined and there appears to be a palace timeline being executed.

We’re entering June, a time when many people hoped to see or hear from Kate in some way, even if it was a general health update and a photo. We’re not getting that. Instead, we’re getting the message that no one will see Kate for many more months. Richard Eden reported that in the Mail this week, that Kate likely wouldn’t be seen publicly until the fall. Now “sources” tell The Daily Beast that Kate likely won’t have any public appearances this entire year, but they might do another “video” update on her health.

Kate will likely be away for the whole year: One source said they do not expect to see Kate back in any kind of public-facing role in the medium term, adding it was possible she would remain absent from public life for the rest of the year. The source said: “Lots of people involved in planning need to know what all the principals are doing a long way in advance. I am told that Kate’s diary for this year is empty. There is nothing planned. She may not appear in public for the rest of the year.”

A video update? Asked how the Palace would deal with the inevitable resurgence of conspiracy theories and speculation that a protracted absence would provoke, The Daily Beast’s source said: “I would not rule out another video message updating the country on her health. That proved to be a very effective way of keeping the conspiracy theorists at bay.”

The Wales family is going to Norfolk today: A friend of Kate and William told The Daily Beast: “The key thing for her now is avoiding any kind of stress or anxiety and just getting on with the business of getting better. They will bail out and be off to Sandringham the moment school breaks up.”

Kate is only “confiding” in her family, not William’s friends: The friend said that Kate has preferred to lean on and confide in her family rather than her and William’s circle of friends, many of whom will be at the Duke of Westminster’s wedding next month (along with her husband who is best man). They said: “The circle of trust is tiny. She has been surrounded by Carole and Michael, and (sister) Pippa and (brother) James have obviously been there for her as well. They are an incredibly tight family, and Catherine feels absolutely confident relying on them. They have been there for her for decades and never let her down.”

She’s not working from home either: There is no doubt her office is certainly managing expectations downwards when it comes to the question of her return to work….While making clear she had read the [Early Childhood] report and been kept updated on it, and that her office was on top of things, the statement carefully avoided any suggestion she was spending her days sitting up in bed with a computer. A source described as a “senior royal aide” went further when it came to explicitly downplaying any suggestions she had an ongoing daily workload, telling the Mail: “She will return to work when she has had the green light from doctors.”

The kids’ half-term starts today: Kate and William are expected to “bail out” of their Windsor home on Friday, one friend said. They are likely to spend the short holiday at the family’s country house, Anmer Hall, on the Sandringham Estate in Norfolk, where there is plenty of room for her mother and father (Carole and Michael Middleton), to stay, and privacy is easy to enforce thanks to a protective local community, many of whom are either friends with or work for the royals in some capacity.

Kate hasn’t been to her kids’ school events, but she possibly did a few drop-offs: The Daily Beast has been told by fellow parents at the smart private school which Kate’s children attend that she has not been seen at the sports matches and the other school events she and her husband usually religiously attend. However, she is understood to have done occasional school runs, one parent said, but while keeping a low profile. “There have been rumors she has done drop-off, but I haven’t seen her since the video,” said one. “We all feel very protective of her. Ask anyone at the school—they are amazing parents.”

[From The Daily Beast]

The weekend before Kate’s cancer-announcement video, “sources” swore up and down that Kate was seen at her kids’ sporting event AND that she was seen at the Windsor Farm Store. Now they’re admitting that was all a lie? I mean, we knew that at the time, but the palace’s refusal to acknowledge that they have zero credibility these days is remarkable. From January on, it just feels like we’ve been fed one lie after another, about everything. Lies about Kate’s condition, lies about the timelines of recovery and illness, lies about why William pulled out events, lies about who took photos, lies about who was actually in certain photos, lies about when photos were taken. As for Kate not being seen all year minus some, um, suspicious “videos,” again, there is such a credibility issue here.

(Sidenote: I’ve long believed that Kate has been in Norfolk for much of the year anyway – I’ve always had my doubts that she’s been in Windsor or London when the palace has claimed.)

Photos courtesy of Cover Images.