Introduction: Minutes 0 to 6:00
We should have an episode out next week and will be off three weeks for the holidays. I watched a cult documentary I paid $4 for on Amazon called The Deep End. Chandra is watching The Gilded Age and still loves it. You can listen below!

Royals: Minutes 6:00 to 24:00
As we mentioned last week, the Dutch translation of Omid Scobie’s Endgame named the racist royals who had concerns about the baby’s skin color. Harry and Meghan first mentioned that in their Oprah interview and did not name the royal racists. To recap, Meghan named the two royal racists in her correspondence with Charles, but those names were not in any of the editions of Endgames except the Dutch one. Scobie claimed he never submitted a book that had their names in it. He said that most of the Fleet Street reporters know who they are, however. Scobie’s publisher, HarperCollins, is going to conduct an inquiry as to how the names got into the Dutch translation. We know Meghan has the receipts.

Meanwhile the royals are doing the most to show they’re not racist except own up to it. Kate’s dodgy uncle Gary did a column for The Daily Mail where he defended Kate by saying she can’t be racist because he and Kate’s mom grew up in West London. Sir Kenneth Olisa, the first black Lord-Lieutenant of London, also defended the royals.

The Daily Mail has said that the royals are taking a “charm offensive” approach to the racism allegations. Kate opened a new Children’s Day Surgery at Guy’s and St Thomas’ Hospital in London this week where she was photographed with people of color. Charles, William and Kate also had crisis talks. These seem to have worked somewhat in that coverage is no longer focused on Endgame.

The Telegraph claimed a royal source is urging the Sussexes to defend the Windsors against the racism claims. This is ridiculous considering the Windsor’s “recollections may vary” response to the Oprah interview. Meanwhile Omid Scobie was asked in a BBC interview if he would apologize to the Windsors.

Harry’s old friend Hugh Grosevenor, the Duke of Westminster, is getting married this June. Hugh is close to Harry and William and is Louis’s godfather. An initial report from Roya Nikkhah in The Times claimed that Hugh didn’t invite Harry and Meghan to his wedding to “avoid a family clash in the House of Windsor.” Then the Daily Mail and The Telegraph did follow ups claiming that Hugh was sad about having to snub the Sussexes but that it’s all Harry’s fault. Page Six blew the lid off all that when they said that Harry got a “save the date” card for Hugh’s wedding a few months ago and then called Hugh to tell him it was best that he didn’t go. This was very tacky of William to use the Duke of Westminster to bash his brother. We wonder how the aristos will get get back at William. We also wonder if William will ever be king.

Comments of the Week: Minutes 24:00 to end
Chandra’s comment of the week is from girl_ninja on Taylor Swift’s Time Magazine person of the year article.

My comment of the week is from DaveW on the post where Angie Harmon said her daughters play Rizzoli and Isles for her dogs when she’s away.

Thanks for listening bitches!

Photos credit: Cover Images, Backgrid, Avalon.red and via Instagram

Behold, the Wales family Christmas card for 2023. I cannot believe this is real and something which William and Kate both signed off on. Everybody’s already made the jokes – it’s giving Olan Mills 1984, it’s giving JC Penney mall studio, it’s giving no imagination whatsoever. While many can make a case for the Wales family copy-keening the Sussexes’ 2021 Christmas card, a better case could probably be made for the Wales family copying the Danish royals, who did a similar card a few years ago. One thing that flies under the radar is that Kate really does copy everything Crown Princess Mary does, it’s just that Kate also style-stalks Meghan constantly too.

What bugs me about this card is the same thing that bugged me about last year’s Christmas card, which was so obviously taken in the summer months: it’s not festive or Christmasy or seasonal in the least. If you’re going to do family photos in a studio – why would you even do that if you’re royal – then can you at least make the backdrop festive or seasonally appropriate? Put the family next to a Christmas tree or a green-and-red background. Something else besides all of this grey dead space. My guess is that we’re supposed to think that they’re so modern, doing this edgy black-and-white card. But it looks dated and like an image from a true-crime docuseries.

Also: the British papers have decided, en masse, to call this Kate’s attempt at “California cool.” Which is… weird. I guess it’s their way of saying that Kate & William stalk everything Harry & Meghan do and wear.

I’m including some pics from Kate’s Christmas concert – for many of the bigger events these days, photo agencies include black-and-white images for some reason. I guess the palace is dictating that? Also: at the Together at Christmas event, Kate had a little mailbox set up so all of the rich children could send holiday cards to poor children. Like… does the UK not have Angel Trees? This was a perfect opportunity to ask people to bring gifts for poor kids.

2023 Christmas card courtesy of Josh Shinner for Kensington Palace, additional photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

The Beatles released their last song “Now and Then” in early November. It’s a good match tonally, as the song is very wistful and melancholic in a way that seems fitting for winter and end-of-the-year reflections. It was also a smart move for stats, giving “Now and Then” a chance to break records — which it’s still doing — before the Christmas catalogues started dominating the charts. With this new, final Beatles record, Paul McCartney is naturally thinking about his time in the band, and of course John Lennon, who wrote and recorded the first demo for “Now and Then.” On his McCartney: A Life in Lyrics podcast this week, Paul noted how grateful he is that he and John had come together (yes, I did that) again as friends before John’s untimely death.

Paul McCartney and John Lennon’s tumultuous relationship has been a sore spot since The Beatles broke up, and now, McCartney is contemplating the possibilities of what would have happened had the pair not rekindled their friendship.

McCartney, 81, opened up about the “what ifs” surrounding the situation in the Wednesday, Dec. 6, episode of iHeartPodcasts and Pushkin Industries’ new podcast, McCartney: A Life in Lyrics.

In it, he described the pair’s reconciliation as being “super, super painful,” noting that he was “glad” he was able to mend the friendship before Lennon was murdered in 1980.

“It was super, super painful,” McCartney shared. “In the end, there was something I was very glad of when he got murdered, was that I had had some really good times with him before that happened.”

“It would have been the worst thing in the world… Had he just been killed and we still had a bad relationship. I would have just thought, ‘Oh, I should have, I should have, I should have,’” he continued. “That would have been a big guilt trip for me.”

In 1969, Lennon privately told the band we would be departing in an angry letter. It wasn’t until a year later that the rift between McCartney and Lennon — which was primarily based in a divergence of creative opinions — became public knowledge and officially led to the Beatles’ break up.

At the time, many fans blamed Lennon’s wife Yoko Ono for driving a wedge between the band members, however McCartney has previously addressed this rumor, vehemently denying that Ono was at all involved in the artists’ decision to disband.

[From Parade]

Oh man, something in the way (yes, I did it again) Paul describes “I should have, I should have, I should have,” gives me chills. That fear is so relatable. And yeah, that would have been so brutal on Paul if things had been left heated and unresolved when John was murdered. They weren’t romantic partners, but they were involved in a deeply dynamic, creative, world-changing relationship. If they hadn’t begun even the barest of a rapprochement, Paul would’ve had to carry that weight (last one, I swear) for the rest of his life. I guess Paul’s holiday gift to us is the reminder to make peace with those we love, cause we don’t know the time any of us have. (Ugh, I hate it when cheeseball sentiments are proven true! Can’t the world leave me to my sass and sarcasm?!)

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Keanu Reeves had a scary incident happen last week when a team of burglars in ski masks broke into his home and stole a firearm. According to the police, they were first called to check on the house earlier in the evening, when someone reported possible intruders. They found nothing and left. However, the alarm was tripped several hours later, sending the police back there to discover the armed intruders had already fled. It doesn’t appear that Reeves or his partner Alexandra Grant were home at the time.

A spokesperson for the Los Angeles Police Department told ABC7 that authorities responded to a call about possible trespassers at the “Matrix” star’s property in the Hollywood Hills at around 7 p.m. Law enforcement sources told TMZ that officers found no one there after receiving the anonymous call, but ended up heading back to the property at around 1 a.m. when an alarm sounded at the house.

Authorities reportedly said that multiple men in ski masks were seen on security cameras smashing a window and entering the property, per the report. They fled before police arrived. TMZ’s sources told the publication that the men took off with a firearm. Authorities are continuing to investigate the incident.

It’s not the first time that the “John Wick” star’s home has been targeted by intruders. In September 2014, the actor’s home was hit by two intruders in two days.

On the first occasion, Reeves was awoken at 4 a.m. to find a woman sleeping in his library chair, TMZ reported at the time. He woke her up and spoke to her before calling 911. The second woman walked into the property the next day when Reeves was not home, before showering and skinny-dipping in his pool. She was removed after the actor’s cleaning staff called Reeves, who called police.

Reeves and his partner, Alexandra Grant, also obtained a temporary restraining order earlier this year against a man claiming to be a relative who reportedly trespassed onto the actor’s home six times between November 2022 and Jan 2023.

[From Yahoo]

I had no idea that Keanu Reeves’ house was such a hotbed of intruder activity. I wonder if they can trace a serial number on the firearm to see if it gets sold or turns up somewhere. It’s also so Keanu to find someone sleeping in his library chair and wake them up to chat with them first. He just seems like such a kind soul.

I’m glad that each time, Reeves and now Alexandra, have been okay. However, the caper heist fan in me is curious about the call about intruders coming in first at 7:00 p.m. but the alarm going off at 1:00 a.m. What was going on at that house for six hours? Was it the perps scoping it out to time how long it would take the police to arrive or was it something more Ocean’s 11-y? I’ve seen enough movies and TV shows to create my own head canon in which it was both. USA, I think we found a potential premise for your ‘breezy drama’ revival era.

Photos credit: Vasquez/Lagossiptv/Backgrid, Xavier Collin/Image Press Agency/Avalon, BauerGriffin/INSTARimages

Here are some photos from the LA premiere of Wonka, which was held last night. You know how Fashion Girls get the studio to pay for their stylist for promotional tours and the studio does so gladly, because it means that the premieres and promotional events will get more attention when a well-dressed woman is part of the tour? Yeah, I think Timothee Chalamet got the same deal. Timmy has really been serving at all of the Wonka premieres. He’s been wearing a lot of Tom Ford, and I suspect that this alligator-skin suit is another Ford look. It looks cool, I cannot lie. Meanwhile, Kylie Jenner came out to support Timmy at his premiere, but she did not walk the carpet. Kris Jenner was there as well, how did you think we found out about this?

Kylie Jenner is supporting boyfriend Timothée Chalamet during his big night in Los Angeles — alongside her mom, Kris Jenner! The Kylie Cosmetics founder, 26, and her mother, 68, stepped out Sunday night to attend the premiere of the actor’s new movie Wonka at the Regency Village Theatre, a source tells PEOPLE.

According to the insider, Kylie and Kris slipped into the theater following the film’s opening credits.

A source told PEOPLE on Monday that Kylie is “incredibly happy” with Chalamet and has even put a label on their romance, calling him “her boyfriend.”

As for the Dune: Part Two actor, the insider said he’s “in awe of everything” The Kardashians star “is accomplishing,” and “especially thinks she is an amazing mom.”

“He is very supportive of her career and she of his,” the source continued. “They both try to attend important events for each other. He is very good for Kylie. Since dating him, she seems very content, relaxed and focused. Her family loves him,” they added of Chalamet.

[From People]

I’m genuinely surprised that Kyliothee has lasted this long, something like eight months. They’re not hiding, but they’re also not flaunting their relationship all over the place. They haven’t even gone Instagram Official yet! But Kylie has been supporting him – she reportedly flew to London last week for his premiere and promotion there. What’s remarkable is that Kylie really is able to slip in and out of premieres without ever being photographed. Anyway, I’m rooting for them.

Also: I would totally eat that “chocolate bar” backdrop at the LA premiere.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

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Here’s a sentence I never thought I’d say: Mariah Carey and I have something in common. Unfortunately, it’s not the Hot 100 No. 1 oops I mean No. 2 Christmas song of the season. It’s that neither of us knew about White Elephant Gift Parties. These gift exchanging parties — sometimes called Dirty Santa or Yankee Swap — date back to the late nineteenth/early twentieth centuries (according to the New York Times) and can have extensive rules and variations. The main gist is that the gifts exchanged are wacky, unnecessary, unwanted, or burdensome. Sounds like a party to me. In a recent interview with People Magazine, a reporter asked Mariah if she liked white elephant parties, to which Ms. Carey responded, “Say what now?”

Sure, Mariah Carey is the Queen of Christmas, but there’s one seasonal pastime she’s clueless about.

The “All I Want For Christmas Is You” singer was unaware of “white elephant parties” until a reporter for People explained them to her during an interview about her thoughts on various Christmas traditions.

Carey drew a blank when asked about “white elephant parties,” which, for the uninitiated, are parties where people trade bizarre, tacky or unwanted gifts with each other.

However, her response was sort of a gift in itself.

“I don’t know of said White Elephant Gift Party. Can you tell me about it?” Carey asked.

Once the reporter explained the concept, Carey admitted she had never participated in one, but added, “I’m always looking for a new game. Something’s fun, it’s good.”

However, she didn’t seem to be a fan of “secret Santa” gift exchanges.

“It’s just like, why? I don’t know,” she said.

Perhaps she just has other things to focus on in December. Her holiday hit “All I Want For Christmas Is You” is currently the No. 2 song in the country, after Brenda Lee’s “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree.”

[From HuffPost]

Of course Mariah has other things to focus on right now. She’s the “Queen of Christmas” and her holiday anthem is only at No. 2 — that might as well be No. Nothing!!! Don’t pester the Queen with peasant party trivia when there’s a crisis afoot! No, I jest (kind of) about Mariah’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” being dethroned (for the time being) by a 65-year-old classic. And like I said, in this instance I totally relate to Ms. Carey. If someone had asked me before reading this news item what a White Elephant Gift Party was, my pithy reply would’ve been “a soiree for those who are unable to see Pink Elephants On Parade.” Personally, I think mine sounds like more fun. Of course, as soon as I finished writing this post I got an email from Etsy with the subject line “White elephant gifts that wow.”

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On Friday, the Princess of Wales hosted her third annual Together at Christmas piano recital. We haven’t heard anything about Kate gracing the world with her piano-key plunking yet again, but it’s completely possible that she went for a pre-taped skit which could air during the Christmas Eve broadcast, you just never know.

This was the first time all three of the Wales kids came out for the event – last year, it was just Charlotte and George, this year Louis finally got to come. Louis promptly reminded everyone why his parents rarely bring him for public events! You know he got wax everywhere and the photos of him leaning over to blow out his sister’s candle made it to all of the papers. At one point, Louis also looked like he was about to f–k with his dad’s candle. One thing I enjoy about Louis is that you can see Kate’s lacquered-on facade begin to crumble in slow-motion as her youngest acts up. Also: I really wish George didn’t have to dress up like a little stockbroker wherever he goes. Let the kid wear a Santa sweater!

As for Kate… she’s been updating her Meghan Lookbook all year, noting how many times Meghan wore all-white ensembles. Kate was particularly fond of Meghan’s Cuyana ensemble at the Invictus Games in September, which is why Kate had to put her own keen stink on it. Kate’s trousers are from Holland Cooper, her bag is by Strathberry and her earrings are Van Cleef & Arpels. The British papers made several references to a “White Christmas,” and even an “all-white Christmas,” because get it, only white royals are allowed in the UK. I’m surprised someone didn’t call it a white-power suit again. A bit on the nose for one of the royal racists.

Note by CB: Get the Top 10 stories about Kate copying Meghan’s style when you sign up for our mailing list! I only send one email a day on weekdays.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

Here are some photos from the Together at Christmas caroling event, which was held at Westminster Abbey on Friday. Considering the Princess of Wales has never been particularly popular within the royal family, it’s always interesting to see who comes out for this event. This year, King Charles and Queen Camilla skipped it, which seems pretty ominous. But the Duchess of Edinburgh (Sophie), Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie all came out. Eugenie and Sophie’s husbands skipped it though! Kind of hilarious. Beatrice brought along her stepson, Edo Mapelli Mozzi’s son Wolfie, and Edo was there as well. Some minor royal-adjacents attended as well. I wonder what the math is for Kate – she clearly wants this to be a big royal-family event, but fewer and fewer royals come out with each passing year.

Interestingly, the Middletons came out as well. James Middleton and his wife Alizee skipped out (they recently welcomed their first child), but Pippa was there with Terribly Moderately Wealthy James. Pippa wore a pantsuit and I keep going back and forth about whether I find it ghastly or sort of retro and cool. The material is too “upholstery” I think, but it was an interesting idea. Meanwhile, Carole and Michael Middleton were out in public for the first time since the coronation, and the first time since Party Pieces collapsed. Is it just me or does Carole look drunk? The wheels have really come off.

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Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Getty, Cover Images.

Throughout everything that’s happened to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, it’s always been clear that they never blamed Queen Elizabeth II for any of the bad stuff, even if one could argue that she was effectively the CEO and she probably could have been a lot firmer on many issues. Still, in the last four years of her life, it was clear that Charles was assuming more power, and so were QEII’s courtiers. They clearly kept things from her and did some ghastly things in her name. One thing that seemed to get through to QEII was that under no circumstances should the Sussexes be without royal protection. She had her private secretary write a cover-your-ass memo expressing her feelings on the subject – that she felt strongly that the Sussexes needed a great deal of security.

The late Queen Elizabeth II considered it “imperative” that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex kept “effective security” after leaving the working Royal family, court documents have revealed. Her most senior aide told a Home Office committee that keeping the Sussexes safe was “of paramount importance to Her Majesty and her family” as he put forward a case for their continuing security, a letter has revealed.

Sir Edward Young wrote to Sir Mark Sedwill, the then Cabinet Secretary, after the Sandringham summit of January 2020 to explain what had been decided by the late Queen and her grandson. The letter, included in newly published court documents, reveals how Sir Edward – writing on behalf of the Palace in his role as the late Queen’s private secretary – made the case for the Sussexes’ continued “effective security” as they left the working Royal family. It invokes the memory of Diana, Princess of Wales, and talks of the threats the Sussexes face from “extremists”.

The letter, published as part of a summary judgment on Friday, contradicts the prevailing narrative that the Duke and Duchess were cut off by the Royal family after being “forced” to leave Britain. It has been submitted to the High Court as part of evidence to reach the truth of whether and when the Duke made an offer to pay for his own security. He has claimed it was raised during the Sandringham Summit. Ravec, the Home Office committee that rules on security matters, did not receive any such offer at that stage, it is claimed.

Reporting the details of what was agreed at the summit, Sir Edward wrote: “During their time in the UK, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex expect to attend public-facing engagements representing the charities and causes which remain dear to them. These engagements would no longer be formally undertaken on behalf of Her Majesty but, given the profile of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, we would expect they would still attract public attention…

“… Of course, a number of these patronages have been granted to them by Her Majesty, which they will continue actively to fulfil. Her Majesty may from time to time invite the Duke and Duchess of Sussex to attend national royal occasions in their private capacity, and Her Majesty is likely to invite the Duke and Duchess of Sussex to participate in family events in keeping with other non-working members of the family.”

On the matter of the Duke and Duchess’s ongoing security, he wrote: “You will understand well that ensuring that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex remain safe is of paramount importance to Her Majesty and her family. Given the Duke’s public profile by virtue of being born into the Royal family, his military service, the Duchess’s own independent profile and the well-documented history of targeting of the Sussex family by extremists, it is imperative that the family continues to be provided with effective security. And, of course, the family is mindful of tragic incidents of the past. The discussions to date, including with [the former chairman of Ravec], have been useful in making sure that the parameters of the Ravec process are well understood. Of course, Her Majesty and her family recognise that these are independent processes and decisions about the provision of publicly funded security are for the UK Government, the government of Canada and any other host government.”

[From The Telegraph]

What’s interesting about this is NOT that it “contradicts the prevailing narrative that the Duke and Duchess were cut off by the Royal family after being ‘forced’ to leave Britain.” What’s interesting about this is that QEII wanted a cover-your-ass memo written to explicitly state that her grandson and his family were still under mortal threat, meaning that even QEII believed that HER people were working against the Sussexes’ interests and that her wishes would likely be disregarded. She was right – the memo was promptly disregarded by RAVEC, by the queen’s Lord Chamberlain and by the man who wrote the letter, Edward Young. Young was part of RAVEC at that time, he not only “presented” the Sussexes’ case to Ravec (leaving out the fact that Harry wanted to pay back his security costs while visiting), and Young was part of the Ravec team who suspended the Sussexes’ security in 2020. The Lord Chamberlain withdrew the Sussexes’ funding and security as punishment for Harry not backing down on Christian Jones and Dan Wootton. And Ravec was all too eager to leave the Sussexes unprotected.

One of the things I’ve always believed (and some of the reporting reflected this) is that when QEII was alive, she had her royal protection team cover Harry and Meghan during their visits in 2021 and 2022. Harry was reportedly pleased with how that arrangement worked. It changed when his father became king, probably because Charles was the one who authorized the withdrawal of the Sussexes’ security in the first place.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

For a second, I honestly thought that they sent Kylie Jenner over to interview Jennifer Lawrence and I thought “wow, that’s actually sort of cool?” But no, reverse it – Interview Magazine sent J-Law to interview Kylie for their cover story. Jen loved every minute of it too – she’s still so obsessed with all things Kardashian-Jenner, she refers to Kris as her own mother and Jen and Kylie bond about makeup and a lot more. Some highlights (for space, JL = Jen Lawrence and KJ = Kylie).

KJ on her best hire: “Probably my dog nanny, since I have seven dogs. Because they kept multiplying. One of them had children and I had to keep the family together.”

KJ on her lack of struggle: “Yeah, it’s a challenge, breaking through [preconceived notions]. But I’ve had such an amazing platform and I choose to put in the work. I could have been handed the same gift and decided not to do anything with it, but I took advantage of this amazing opportunity. But with the paparazzi, it’s been really hard. I’ve had some horror stories….Just, like, when I was 16 and these 50-year-old men were saying, “Hi, little slut,” and—Trying to shoot up my skirt and jumping out of the bushes, scaring me, blocking my car. It was actually worse when I was younger. But I don’t really know what it would be like to grow up not in the spotlight, and that’s helped me because I have nothing to refer back to.

JL on horoscopes: “You and Kendall are so different. You and me are Leos. We’re happy, excited golden retrievers. And Kendall, of course, is a Scorpio like our mother, Kris.

KJ on lip contours: “I think it started because I just wanted big, fat, juicy lips, and I just wanted that illusion that I had fuller lips. But no one taught me. When I started doing that, I wasn’t really working with makeup artists and stuff.

JL on how makeup transforms her face: “That’s really, really cool. And I also think it’s incredible what makeup can do because I work with Hung [Vanngo], who overlines the lip, and I call him a plastic surgeon, because everybody in the last few months since I’ve been working with him is convinced that I had eye surgery. I’m like, “I didn’t have eye surgery. I’m doing makeup.”

KJ on lip fillers: “I did end up getting lip fillers, but it’s also the same with me. I’ll see before and after photos when I’m 12 years old versus 26 and my eyebrows are filled differently. I have contour on. I’m like,“How can you compare my 12-year-old face and say I’ve gotten my jaw shaved and eyelids removed?” I’m like, “What are we talking about?”

JL on how her face has changed: “I have the same thing. I started at 19, so I get the before and after pictures from when I’m 19 to 30 and I’m like, “I grew up. I lost baby weight in my face, and my face changed because I’m aging.” Everybody thought I had a nose job, and I’m like, “I’ve had the exact same nose. My cheeks got smaller. Thank you for bringing it up.”

KJ on Jordyn Woods: “Jordyn and I, we always stayed in touch throughout the years and we would meet up at my house and catch up and just talk through everything. We never fully cut each other off, and one day, naturally, we were like, we want to get sushi and we don’t want to hide anymore. There’s a learning lesson in everything, and I think that in a weird way, everything happens how it’s supposed to happen. We were so attached at the hip that we needed space to grow into the people that we were supposed to be. I needed that independence and that confidence because she was like my security blanket for so long.

[From Interview Magazine]

The part about everyone thinking Jennifer got plastic surgery is real, although it’s not exactly recent. People noticed that she began to look “different” several years ago, although it’s gotten more pronounced this year. Is it just makeup? Perhaps it is, because I still can’t put my finger on exactly what’s changed, but something has. As for what Kylie says about Jordyn… I’m glad that they never cut each other off and that whole situation with Khloe and Tristan was just so utterly unhinged.

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Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Avalon Red,Cover Images, Interview’s IG.