Here are some photos from Kamala Harris’s Philadelphia rally last night. She staged the rally on the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art, made famous by Rocky. Thousands of Philadelphians packed Benjamin Franklin Parkway to hear VP Harris speak and to watch the star-studded final rally before Election Day. Ricky Martin, Lady Gaga, The Roots, Fat Joe and Oprah were all there. The Harris-Walz campaign has had a lot of celebrity involvement and it hasn’t been a big criticism at all. I’ve said this all along – the Republicans can’t slam Democrats for being “too Hollywood” because Republicans worship a degenerate reality star. Plus, the degenerate reality star is sick with jealousy that Democrats have all the “good celebrities.” Speaking of, the Hollywood Reporter took the temperature in Hollywood for Election Day and Election Night:

There’s a common refrain running through Hollywood regarding election night plans: Put the champagne on ice. Celebratory and star-packed shindigs of years past — basically anything prior to 2016 — are just that, history, and have been replaced by casual, more intimate and anxiety-filled gatherings. The reason? It’s complicated, and best explained by one of the industry’s most politically active producers.

“The biggest change for me personally is the understanding that we most likely will not have a confirmed outcome by the end of election night. We’ve now seen major swings with vote-by-mail being counted later than in-person voting, so the idea of doing a ‘party’ on election night doesn’t make sense due to that uncertainty, and others probably feel the same way,” explains Jamie Patricof, founder of Hunting Lane, an auteur-driven film, TV and documentary production company and a longtime political activist. “The 2016 election was also traumatizing for a lot of people, and the fact that 2020 extended until that Saturday has changed the course of election night plans. For me, it’s now more important to be with friends, family and people who have poured their hearts, time and effort into getting candidates elected that are critical to the policies and issues important to them and us. There are plenty of other days and nights to have parties.”

Another one of Hollywood’s most politically active producers reports that they will be “pacing” on the set of their new movie while watching results trickle in. A well-placed communications executive will be playing poker with friends as a distraction. Couch surfing with remote in hand for more than a handful who were asked to share plans. “People are honestly too scared to jinx anything,” one said. Pizza and cable news is on the menu for a veteran manager. Kelli McNeil-Yellen, writer, producer and founder of KLA Media, will be focusing on a different menu by tackling a challenging recipe from Julia Child.

“My husband [director/cinematographer Alexander Yellen] and I got a mid-priced bottle of pinot noir to accompany the meal — nothing in the celebratory price range but also nothing cheap — and are tackling the original Julia Child boeuf bourguignon recipe from scratch for two reasons: One, it’s going to take hours to make and hopefully keep our minds off things, and secondly, we’re going to need some comfort food and we can’t think of anything that sticks to your ribs better than an OG Julia Child recipe,” said McNeil-Yellen.

As for Patricof, he plans to be stuck like glue “to all the pundits I’ve spent every day and night with for the last few years.” He continued: “This is like my Super Bowl. I can’t wait for the Steve Kornacki cam [on NBC]. I totally envy and respect anyone who can play Monopoly Deal and enjoy Tuesday night by taking their mind off the election. I will definitely be taking advantage of watching four windows at once on YouTube TV.”

[From THR]

I make no qualms about it, I’m going to be watching MCNBC and scrolling Twitter. I’m not sure we’ll know who won tonight, but I actually think we’ll know by Wednesday evening. The situation in 2020, where it took four days to count votes in Michigan, Philly and Georgia…I just feel like people are more prepared overall. But yeah, I’m all for people being cautious and not expecting a huge celebration tonight. The Harris campaign knows what they’re doing and they’re preparing people to tuck in because it could take a few days.

FULL VIDEO: Lady Gaga performing “The Edge of Glory” at the final Kamala Harris rally in Philadelphia.pic.twitter.com/gteiPlNRo9

— Lady Gaga Now (@ladygaganownet) November 5, 2024

Photos courtesy of Cover Images.

Over the weekend, there was a casual announcement that King Charles and Camilla would be “back to normal” next year with their international tours. Within that announcement, palace sources somewhat confirmed that Charles and Camilla would likely head to Italy next spring. As I pointed out, this “Italian tour” was supposed to belong to Prince William and Kate. Last December, Kensington Palace rushed the announcement that the Keens would head to Italy, then the planned tour had to be shelved indefinitely because of Kate’s health issues. Well, now that it looks like Charles and Cam stole William and Kate’s big Italian tour, suddenly Kate is keen to let everyone know that she’ll be back to working and touring soon enough. That is, she won’t be back at all, and she’s planning to do next to nothing but she really wants to go to Italy, you guys.

Robert Jobson, best-selling author of Catherine: The Princess of Wales, believes we will see more outings from Kate – including foreign trips – but that she will take a “less is more” approach, hand-picking her public appearances for maximum impact.

“From what I understand, Catherine is doing very well. She is back training at the gym and doing all the things she wanted to do,” he told HELLO!. “I do think that we will start to see a lot more of her, and that she will carry out engagements as well as continuing to work behind the scenes.”

Reflecting on her public appearances, he continued: “But rather than travel all over the country all the time, like she used to, I think she will concentrate on more impactful events. If she has her way, she will come back in stages and do things that are important to her: because she doesn’t want to get ill again but also, I’m told, because she has a different perspective now. Her focus will be on her family, while still managing to do the key events. I think William is very keen that she does stage a comeback, but I don’t think that necessarily signals that we’re going to get a big tranche of engagements, one after the other.

“They probably realise that if you get a lot of something all the time, it lessens its impact. With Catherine being the main female star of the royal family, actually you can make a bigger statement by being seen less.”

2025 is likely to involve more planning, especially if William and Kate carry out an overseas tour. Any travels could include an official trip to Italy, at the request of the Foreign Office, which they had to postpone earlier this year.

“They will start travelling again and I expect them to do at least one tour next year,” Robert explained. “I would expect a trip to Canada or somewhere at some stage, and Italy is the sort of trip they could do in two or three days. Catherine may well do a couple of solo things so that William can stay at home with the kids. The King is bound to have had a conversation with Catherine about how buoyed he felt by his recent overseas tour, but she will do things her own way. Her illness has been a life-changing experience; she has changed the way she lives her life and I think she will be making her own choices. Her priority is still her family.”

[From Hello]

“They probably realise that if you get a lot of something all the time, it lessens its impact… actually you can make a bigger statement by being seen less.” This has been Will and Kate’s rationale for the past fourteen years – less is more, our busywork is more impactful because we rarely work, we can assume the mantles of global statesmanship and keen expertise without putting in the work. I’m just saying, this isn’t a brand new perspective for them – they’ve always done f–k all and they will continue to do f–k all. I genuinely think that part of what happened this year – not all, but part – is that Kate, William, the Middletons and Charles worked out some kind of agreement in which Kate isn’t expected to do much of anything from here on out, and the Middletons got a reentrance into posh society. It’s very strange.

Photos courtesy of Kensington Palace, Cover Images.

Embed from Getty Images

The past month has been full of catastrophic shenanigans from Elon Musk. That man is crazy, racist and probably a heavy drug user. He “offers” his sperm to random women and has already taken steps to create a Musk baby-mother compound in Texas. He’s also basically moved to the swing states, spending most of his time in Pennsylvania, where he’s held unhinged rallies and given away $1 million checks to Trumpers. Beyond that, he’s also been kidnapping people in U Haul vans and forcing them to “canvass” for Trump and then not paid them. Oh, and he’s in regular contact with Vladimir Putin. Someone suggested that Musk is this year’s Rudy Giuliani – just sacrificing every part of his life for Donald Trump, who actually despises both Rudy and Elon. Speaking of Elon’s crimes, you know those $1 million checks which were supposed to be given to people chosen at random? Yeah, not so much a lottery as much as it’s a crime.

A lawyer for Elon Musk said in a Philadelphia courtroom Monday that the winners of Musk’s $1 million daily prize giveaway in election swing states are not chosen at random, contradicting what Musk said when he announced the contest last month. Legal experts told NBC News that the disclosure could have legal fallout for Musk across multiple jurisdictions under laws designed to protect consumers from deceptive practices.

“This is absolutely, unambiguously illegal,” Christopher Peterson, a University of Utah law professor who specializes in consumer protection, said in an email. “You cannot lawfully lie to the public about conducting a random sweepstakes, lottery, or contest and then rig the results to hand-select the winners. It really is not complicated. This is just fraud; a simple, ugly fraud on the public.” He said Musk and his super PAC’s behavior could be “both a civil wrong and a crime.”

Musk’s America PAC declined to comment on that analysis or the views of other legal experts. Musk did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

Chris Gober, a lawyer for America PAC, made the disclosure at a hearing about the giveaways. He said that the winners are not chosen by random, as in a lottery drawing, but that the super PAC instead selects the winners based on who it believes would be effective political spokespeople.

The disclosure flew in the face of what Musk said onstage at a Pennsylvania rally on Oct. 19, when he revealed the contest to draw attention to a petition supporting free speech and gun rights. “We’re going to be awarding $1 million randomly to people who have signed the petition every day from now until the election,” Musk said, followed by wild applause from the audience.

[From NBC News]

Yep, it’s a crime and it’s also a massive civil suit just waiting to happen. There will be more plaintiffs too, because a Pennsylvania judge ruled on Monday that Musk’s criminal faux-lottery can continue. District Attorney Larry Krasner had taken Musk to court to get these clear election interence shut down, but Judge Angelo Foglietta is letting it go ahead, possibly because today is Election Day. But I definitely believe that if this election goes the way we need it to go, Musk will be facing criminal charges and many civil lawsuits.

Embed from Getty Images

Photos courtesy of Getty, Cover Images.

Embed from Getty Images

Kamala Harris spent the last hours of Election Eve in Pennsylvania, and there were rumors that a mystery guest would appear alongside her for the last big campaign stop. Perhaps a certain global pop star who was born in Pennsylvania? But no, Taylor Swift did not make a surprise appearance at a Kamala Harris rally. Lady Gaga did! But Taylor was in Kansas City to watch the KC Chiefs beat the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 24-30.

Taylor once again chose to showcase her legs for another Chiefs appearance. She wore a vintage Chiefs varsity jacket, black denim shorts, a tank top from Mugler, Louboutin boots ($2195), a Dior saddle bag ($4400) and a Chanel necklace. She’s really been doing the most for her game-day fashion this season, I feel like she’s really planning out her outfits to a crazy degree.

I think Taylor is registered to vote in Tennessee? So she probably already voted absentee. While I’m fine with Taylor making a point to support her boyfriend, it would not be my choice to hang out on Election Eve and probably Election Day in Kansas City, Missouri with a bunch of Republicans. Speaking of, Patrick Mahomes’ mom is just like his wife: MAGA to the core.

Patrick Mahomes’ mom decided to show the world her whole MAGA trash ass before MNF pic.twitter.com/qVhRKEXvXQ

— Wu Tang is for the Children (@WUTangKids) November 5, 2024

Embed from Getty Images

Embed from Getty Images

Embed from Getty Images

Photos courtesy of Getty.

Today is Election Day. Obviously, we here at Celebitchy endorse Vice President Kamala Harris and Governor Tim Walz. They are abundantly qualified and they will be competent, compassionate, intelligent and bold leaders. I’ve been writing about Donald Trump’s unhinged white nationalism and fascism for nine f–king years. Donald Trump is despicable and we are not going back. I know it’s not over and Trump and his cult will still exist after today, but it does feel like the country is ready to be done with him, right? So please vote. Many of you already voted and that’s amazing, but there are millions of people voting today. Double-check your registration, execute your voting plan and get your I Voted stickers. Michiganders are super-lucky this year because their I Voted sticker features a werewolf.

Last night, Kamala Harris was in Philadelphia, because that’s how important Pennsylvania is in this election. My delusional liberal vibe is that Harris-Walz is going to outperform the Biden-Harris 2020 results in states Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan. I think VP Harris will also outperform in Georgia. I’m not so sure about North Carolina and Florida, but I do feel like the East Coast results (which will mostly come in before midnight tonight) should set the table for what I hope will be a sweeping Harris-Walz win. While I’m nervous, I’m less nervous than I was in 2016 and 2020. I’ve also braced myself for disinformation campaigns and Donald Trump and the MAGA cult trying to instigate multiple coups. Be prepared, be vigilant, be smart. I’m including the voter protection hotlines in every state. I’m also including some of the Harris-Walz campaign’s final ads, including one featuring Eminem’s “Til I Collapse” and one with Ron Perlman’s voiceover.

Save this graphic. Then share it with friends.

Every eligible voter has the freedom to vote and have their vote counted. pic.twitter.com/njdHfky4By

— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) November 4, 2024

Tomorrow. https://t.co/VbrfuqVy9P pic.twitter.com/z1Df3LEuP3

— Kamala Harris (@KamalaHarris) November 5, 2024

NEW AD: Tomorrow is our chance to reclaim the American dream and restore the promise of freedom.

Let’s rise. pic.twitter.com/BqBYB1NGAl

— Kamala HQ (@KamalaHQ) November 4, 2024

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid, Cover Images.

Happy US Election Day to all who celebrate! Hopefully, we are merely hours away from history being made in the United States. (Fingers crossed!) At the very least, we’re hours away from the end of all of the annoying political calls, texts, and ads from this election cycle. As you know, Madam Vice President has surrounded herself with smart and competent people while The Former Guy has basically let all of the worst people run wild with disinformation and propaganda. He’s also promised people like Elon Musk and Robert F. Kennedy Jr. positions within his next administration.

As Kaiser talked about yesterday, RFK Jr. has said that under a Trump administration, the government would remove fluoride from America’s public water system. Why is there now an attack on fluoride? I truly have no idea other than that brain worm really did do some damage. Contrary to now popular MAGA belief, fluoride is not the public health enemy that they’d have you believe it is. Fluoride has actually long been considered good for public health because it’s a naturally occurring element found in water that also happens to help fight cavities. Yahoo has compiled a little ‘what to know” about fluoride:

What is fluoride? Fluoride is an element that’s naturally found in rivers, lakes and oceans, as well as in some foods and drinks, according to the American Dental Association (ADA). “It is also added to public water supplies,” Dr. Michael Kosdon, a dentist at Smiles of NYC, tells Yahoo Life. Fluoride is known as “nature’s cavity fighter,” according to the ADA, and it’s often added to dental products, including toothpaste, to protect teeth from cavities.

What does fluoride do? Fluoride helps to strengthen your teeth, Rebecca Henderson, associate professor in The Ohio State University College of Dentistry, tells Yahoo Life. “Teeth, like bones in our body, are composed of minerals —primarily calcium and phosphate.” When someone has cavities, bacteria feed on refined carbohydrates that you eat and produce an acid byproduct in your mouth, Henderson says. “This acid removes minerals from our teeth, breaking down layers of tooth structure and eventually leading to a hole or a cavity in the tooth surface. Fluoride helps to strengthen the tooth surfaces by returning and preserving the lost minerals in our tooth, preventing a cavity from forming.” Research has found that adding fluoride to water reduces the amount of tooth decay in young kids by 35%.

Can fluoride be harmful? Fluoride is beneficial, say experts. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), it’s considered “one of 10 great public health achievements of the 20th century” thanks to its ability to prevent tooth decay. However, too much fluoride can cause fluorosis, “which presents as white streaks or blotchy white patches on the enamel,” Kosdon says. “These chalky areas are known as decalcified enamel and [in severe cases] are much weaker and prone to cavities.”

Fluorosis is not harmful: In most cases, fluorosis is cosmetic and isn’t harmful to your health. According to Henderson, it’s more common when children use multiple sources of fluoride over a long period of time. That can include drinking water with fluoride, using and mistakenly swallowing fluoridated toothpaste and taking fluoride supplements. “Having knowledge of the fluoride level in your community water system and the other amounts of fluoride your child under age 8 is ingesting is the key to preventing dental fluorosis,” she says.

You’d have to drink a ton of fluoride to come close to toxic levels: There are claims online that fluoride is poisonous, but experts say that’s a stretch. Excessive amounts of fluoride can be harmful, but it’s rare and typically happens in young children. The ADA notes that you would have to drink five liters of water for every kilogram of body weight at once to have fluoride toxicity — which is a toxic amount of water. On a cosmetic level, it is nearly “impossible to drink enough water that contains fluoride to actually create any discoloration,” Dr. Mark S. Wolff, dean at the University of Pennsylvania School of Dental Medicine, tells Yahoo Life.

70 years of research: The ADA also says this about having fluoride in water: “Water fluoridation is safe, effective and healthy. Seventy years of research, thousands of studies and the experience of more than 210 million Americans tell us that water fluoridation is effective in preventing cavities and is safe for children and adults.”

Should anyone avoid fluoride? There are some populations who shouldn’t have fluoride. “I would definitely avoid fluoride in infants younger than six months,” Kosdon says. Using fluorinated water in baby formula may also increase the risk of mild fluorosis, according to the ADA. Kosdon adds that people with kidney disease may also need to avoid high levels of fluoride.

How to know if you’re getting the right amount of fluoride: Fluoride in community drinking water systems is regulated at the state and local level, Henderson says. If you drink water that’s not from a well, you’re getting at least some level of fluoride in your tap water. In fact, 75% of fluoride intake comes from drinking water with added fluoride and from food and beverages, such as sodas and fruit juice, made with fluoridated water, according to the CDC.

It’s beneficial for your teeth: “For adults and children over the age of two, drinking fluoridated tap water, along with following instructions for daily use of toothpaste with fluoride, creates the best chance for the tooth to be strong enough to prevent tooth decay,” Henderson says. “For children under the age of two, a doctor or dentist should be consulted on the use of fluoridated toothpaste.” (In general, typically, a toothpaste smear the size of a grain of rice for children less than 3 years old, and no more than a “pea-sized” amount of toothpaste is recommended for ages 3 and up.)

For the good of public health: If you’re unsure about your fluoride needs, it’s worth checking in with a dentist for personalized recommendations. However, experts stress that there’s no need to be scared of fluoride. “Public water fluoridation is seen as one of the leading public health measures, saving millions of dollars in dental care and decay and pain in people of all ages,” Wolff says.

[From Yahoo Life]

All of this information mirrors what our pediatrician has told us since my older son was born. Sigh. Sometimes, it really does feel like we’re living in the dumbest timeline. I know it’s human nature to question things or be a contrarian, but it’s just insane that this is something that they’re coming for. Then again, why wouldn’t Republicans think that fluoride is bad when they don’t even understand how masks work or believe that climate change is real? I mean, Make Cavities Great Again, #amirite?!

RFK Jr.’s policies have Republicans all riled up about how the government is finally going to do something about all of the preservatives and otherwise unhealthy crap that’s in our foods. It’s not like their own elected officials have purposefully deregulated health and safety standards while defunding agencies like the FDA that exist to keep our food and drinking water safe. I’m old enough to remember when they went after Michelle Obama for trying to tackle this very problem.

Also, on a quick personal note, for the past eight years, I have learned a lot from reading the comments on CB’s political posts. I was dealing with a personal tragedy during the summer of 2016, so I wasn’t as engaged until the very end, and a lot of it was inspired by what y’all had to say on here. So, if you feel like what you have to say doesn’t matter, please know that it does. There is always someone who is listening. We’re all in this together, fluoride and all.

photos credit: Mart Production, Jep Gambardella, Cottonbro Studios and RDNE Stock Project on Pexels

Embed from Getty Images
Chris Martin fell in a trap door in Melbourne, Australia over the weekend while performing with Coldplay during their Music of the Spheres world tour. This comes on the uprooted heels of Olivia Rodrigo falling in a trap door at the Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne, Australia, during a stop for her GUTS world tour just last month. What is happening with the onstage trap doors in Melbourne, Australia?! One incident is a crazy accident, but two in the same city within the span of a month, and I’m ready to start talking conspiracy theories. But I suppose it’d be proper to first get a hold of the facts before I start spinning wild perfectly plausible scenarios:

Coldplay frontman Chris Martin took a dramatic tumble during a show in Australia before emerging apparently unhurt from a hole in the stage.

Video of the incident posted to social media showed Martin addressing the crowd at the Marvel Stadium in Melbourne on Sunday as he walked around during a break between songs, before suddenly disappearing from view.

His fall appears to be broken by someone standing below the stage, and Martin soon returns to a standing position.

“That’s uh, not planned. Thank you for catching me, so much. Thank you, guys,” said Martin.

“Holy sh*t, that was nearly a YouTube moment,” he added.

Martin then continued with the show, which was the fourth and final gig in Melbourne as part of Coldplay’s Music of the Spheres world tour.

The first show in the city was also marked by an unwelcome development, as bassist Guy Berryman was absent due to illness.

“Tonight was the first time in our band’s history that we’ve played a show without all four members onstage,” Coldplay said in a post on Instagram.

“Guy was taken ill unexpectedly just before the show. Thank you for carrying us through it.”

The band will play four dates in Sydney next before moving on to Auckland in New Zealand.

The tour will end with 10 shows at Wembley Stadium in London starting August 22 next year.

Martin’s mishap comes after a similar incident involving singer Olivia Rodrigo at a recent show at the Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne.

The US pop star was running around the stage lit only by a spotlight when she suddenly plunged into a hole, appearing to catch herself using her arms.

[From CNN]

All right, Melbourne, what do you have to say for yourself? Why are you systematically trying to take out global touring artists via arena stage trap doors? My guesses, in no particular order: the ghost of an 19th century Australian singer is haunting the venues of Melbourne in retaliation for being upstaged by a foreign performer the night of what was supposed to be their big debut. Or, kangaroos have unionized and taken over stage management duties and simply don’t understand how humans can’t make a decent jump. Or, there’s no ill-will and these really have been accidents, it’s just that the US-based acts keep forgetting that trap doors are on the other side of the road Down Under. All very viable options!!

I do hope Chris Martin followed in Olivia Rodrigo’s other footsteps, and went to the hospital post-show to rule out a concussion. While Olivia ran forward towards her hole, Chris walked backward into his and, yeah, it wasn’t pretty. It certainly looked like he got a rush of blood to the head. (Thank you, thank you, yes that was well done.)

The moment Chris Martin fell through a trapdoor right in front of me at the #Coldplay concert tonight. pic.twitter.com/qIdzMEGG0s

— Greg Briggs (@greg__briggs) November 3, 2024

Photos credit: Mike Gray/Justin Ng/Avalon, Getty

On Saturday, John Mulaney hosted the funniest episode of Saturday Night Live that I’ve seen in a while. I think the last one I enjoyed this much was the one Ryan Gosling hosted in September 2023, and that was because Gosling looked like he was having the time of his life at Studio 8H.

This was Mulaney’s sixth time hosting SNL. Since his first time hosting in 2018, Mulaney has had a recurring series of musical sketches. The first one was the hilarious “Diner Lobster.” In the first four sketches of the series, Pete Davidson played a character whose actions were the catalyst for the ensemble breaking into parody songs. He did not appear in the fifth one because he was away shooting a movie, but he was back for number six. Speaking of, Pete has been in the process of removing his tattoos because he wanted to focus more on acting and was tired of having to sit in the makeup chair for an extra three hours just to have his tats covered up. Last week, we got a glimpse of Pete’s new look thanks to a photo he took with Machine Gun Kelly at an event in LA. This weekend, we got an even better look at his bare arms during his appearance in “Port Authority Duane Reade.”

A year after hosting Saturday Night Live, Pete Davidson made a surprise return to help his friend and host John Mulaney poke fun at…the Port Authority Duane Reade. (If you know Diner Lobster, you know where we’re going with us.)

“Welcome to the Duane Reade inside the Port Authority bus terminal,” a behind-the-counter Mulaney said to Davidson and SNL’s Andrew Dismukes. “May I offer you a flu shot?”

Davidson—wearing a t-shirt that showed off his now-almost-bare arms following his tattoo removal—passed on the vaccine but admitted he needed a few things before he and Dismukes catch a bus to Boston.

“Our system is down right now,” Mulaney revealed, “so we are only accepting cash or sex.”

Thankfully, Davidson said had change to pay for, um, “that jug of milk in the little fridge…I’ll take that.”

Yes, that’s he wanted. Even Mulaney was appalled.

“I’m sorry,” the host replied. “You mean the gallon of milk surrounded by cans of twisted iced tea in the fridge that’s hotter than the rest of the store?”

Davidson insisted it would be OK—”I don’t want to make a separate stop at the supermarket in Boston”—and while he thought the jug said organic, well, it actually read organ.

“What’s the big deal?” he asked. “Milk is milk, right?”

Wrong.

Cue a family of possums (that would be Kenan Thompson and Ego Nwodim) singing “Milk From My Wife” to the tune of “The Circle of Life.”

“From the moment she gave birth in a backpack, her dozen nipples began to excrete,” Thompson belted out. “But there was more to see than can ever unsee. A plastic jug filled with goop from her teat. It’s milk from my wife and it feeds a soul!”

From there, Mulaney, Davidson and Dismukes went on to poke fun at the Timothée Chalamet lookalike contest, Mayor Eric Adams and why NYC keeps shampoo under lock and key.

For Davidson, the 8-minute cameo marked a rare public outing as he’s temporarily stepped out of the spotlight. Before SNL, he was most recently seen out alongside pal Machine Gun Kelly Oct. 23 in Los Angeles, where he debuted the progress of his jaw-dropping tattoo removal, a stark difference from his previous appearance in which his arms were filled with ink.

[From E! News]

Nothing will ever be as funny as the original Diner Lobster sketch but I thought “Port Authority Duane Reade” was pretty fun. It’s weird to see Pete without all of the tattoos but he looks really good in general! While watching the episode, I noticed how healthy both Pete and John look. It’s not the lack of tattoos. They both just look healthier and happier, and I hope they are both in better places now.

We almost never stay up to watch SNL live, but our kids were at their grandparents’ house on Saturday and the extra hour of sleep from the end of daylight savings time inspired us to stay up to watch Vice President Harris make her cameo. We ended up watching almost all of it! We stopped right before Chappell Roan’s second song because we are old and just couldn’t stay awake any longer, lol. I especially loved “What’s That Name” which had a cameo by Senator Tim Kaine. That was hilarious.

If you’re interested in watching it, here’s “Port Authority Duane Reade” sketch:

Photos are screenshots from YouTube/SNL

Kim Kardashian & many others attended the LACMA Art+ Film gala. [Socialite Life]
Here’s Ariana Grande at a Wicked premiere in Sydney. [RCFA]
Quincy Jones has passed away at the age of 91. [Just Jared]
The Avengers, minus Chris Pratt, assemble for Kamala Harris. [LaineyGossip]
Hugh Hewitt huffed out of WaPo. [Pajiba]
Congrats to the Dodgers! [Go Fug Yourself]
James Van Der Beek has colorectal cancer. [Seriously OMG]
Jill Duggar Dillard & her garbage husband can take themselves out. [Starcasm]
Happy birthday to Matthew McConaughey. [Hollywood Life]
FCC commissioner throws tantrum about Kamala Harris’s SNL cameo. [Buzzfeed]

The Times of London and Sunday Times have a new series called “The Duchy Files,” where they’re exposing the shocking ways in which King Charles and Prince William exploit businesses, charities, public services and everyday citizens through the Duchy of Lancaster and Duchy of Cornwall. The Duchy of Cornwall is the purview/income of the Prince of Wales. The Duchy of Lancaster “belongs” to the sovereign, who is now King Charles. People know that the duchys are vast real estate networks, but I always assumed that the duchies were mostly commercial property (office buildings & the like) and farms. I didn’t know that the duchies consisted of sh-t like “all of the shoreline and riverbeds on Devon’s coast.” The Times has revealed the first part of their series, and here’s a link to the coverage, which is insane. Some highlights:

In a five-month investigation, we used the royal addresses to uncover their business contracts and discovered how the duchies are making millions of pounds each year by charging government departments, councils, businesses, mining companies and the general public via a series of commercial rents and feudal levies on land largely seized by medieval monarchs. The Duchy Files show the royals charge for the right to cross rivers; offload cargo onto the shore; run cables under their beaches; operate schools and charities; and even dig graves. They earn revenue from toll bridges, ferries, sewage pipes, churches, village halls, pubs, distilleries, gas pipelines, boat moorings, opencast and underground mines, car parks, rental homes and wind turbines.

The royals’ formal duties, palaces and official households are paid for each year by the sovereign grant. This is funded by an agreed percentage of the income that the government-run Crown Estate makes by managing land surrendered by the monarch 260 years ago. Next year the grant will give the royals £132 million. But the King and prince also receive private incomes from the profit generated by their duchies. Last year the Duchy of Lancaster raised £27.4 million for the King and the Duchy of Cornwall raised £23.6 million for William, which they can use as they see fit, for example to fund their private homes, personal income and staff.

Our Insight investigation reveals: All 5,410 landholdings and properties held by the royal duchies[ The NHS will pay the King’s duchy £11m over 15 years to rent a warehouse for ambulances; Ministry of Justice pays William’s duchy £1.5m a year to use Dartmoor prison; The army pays to train on Dartmoor, the navy to moor and refuel its fleet; Charges are levied on Liverpool container port, the Mersey ferry — and a sewage pipe; Charities have paid millions to rent a 1960s office block in central London.

The Duchies of Lancaster and Cornwall stretch beyond the counties they are named after to cover 180,000 acres of England and Wales. They are largely made up of land and seashores seized by kings in the centuries immediately after the Norman Conquest. The royals surrendered control of the Crown Estate to the Treasury in the 18th century but the monarch and his heir were allowed to keep their duchies, partly because they did not generate much income. However, their revenues have soared in recent decades and today the duchies are sprawling modern property businesses with assets jointly worth £1.8 billion, according to their annual reports.

The Duchy Files reveal that both the monarch and the prince have contracts with taxpayer-funded public services that pay them millions. The Duchy of Cornwall land extends along large stretches of the seashore and rivers around the southwest of England, including the bed of the Dart estuary, which runs alongside the Britannia Royal Naval College in Dartmouth, where Britain’s naval officers are trained. But the lease document below shows that over the past 20 years, the duchy has charged the Ministry of Defence a total of at least £900,000 for the right to moor boats on the waters surrounding the college, which are needed to train the recruits on the river.

Thirty miles down the coast at Plymouth, the prince’s duchy owns the shoreline next to Devonport — western Europe’s largest naval base and a refuelling site for Britain’s Trident nuclear submarines. William is commodore-in-chief of the submarine service. In 2017, a 125-year deal was struck that required the navy to pay the duchy £10,000 a year for access to its own oil depot, so it can refuel its warships. At the same base, the navy has been paying the prince a further £3,250 a year to use a jetty. The duchy’s lease specified that the MoD had to spend at least £900,000 on the jetty’s construction, even though its ownership will eventually revert back to the prince when the lease ends. When the navy wanted to deploy navigation beacons on the sea at Plymouth Sound, the duchy charged them £100.

The King is the head of the armed forces and the prince is a lieutenant colonel in the army. Yet William’s duchy, which owns 67,500 acres of Dartmoor, is charging the military for the right to train on the moorland under a 21-year deal struck when Charles was Duke of Cornwall. The duchy describes this as “a private arrangement between landlord and tenant”. When we sought disclosure of the lease under the Freedom of Information Act, the MoD responded with a copy of the lease pictured below, but redacted the amount paid, and even blanked out the prince’s name. Philip Sanders, a local Conservative councillor and a Dartmoor National Park warden, said: “I see no reason why the duchy couldn’t agree to let the MoD use the moor without charge because it’s the training of troops for the defence of our land.”

In the middle of the national park stands HMP Dartmoor. Built by the Admiralty with taxpayers’ money in the 19th century to hold French prisoners in the Napoleonic wars, today it is a category C prison for 640 non-violent inmates. Under its terms, the Ministry of Justice (MoJ) is required to pay the prince £1.5 million a year — at least £37.5 million over the 25 years of the lease. The annual rent is more than double the amount paid in the 1980s, even after taking into account rises for inflation. Within the contract is a “dilapidations credit” clause that compels the MoJ to spend a minimum of £68 million over the next decade updating the buildings at the prison.

[From The Times]

Did you know that William gets £1.5 million a year for Dartmoor prison? Jesus. And charging the military exorbitant rates for the use of what should be federal land. The Times went on from there to detail how Charles and William’s duchies charge charities and public services like “garage space for ambulances” (£829,348 a year) and leasing land for a fire station (£612,000). The duchies are also charging exorbitant rental rates for SCHOOLS, from elementary schools up through a couple of colleges. One MP, Sir Edward Leigh, the MP, suggested that it’s actually really tacky that the royals profit so heavily from public services: “They’ve got to accept they’re not a business. Don’t make a profit from public services like the armed forces and the NHS. This shows the value of scrutiny, because from now on, if they are charging [a public service], they will know it’s going to be scrutinised and people are going to ask why and they’ve got to justify it.” Justify it? How are people not rioting in the streets? Instead of putting public funds into public services, millions of taxpayer dollars are going to “renting” seabeds, coastlines and land from Charles and William, all of it based on lands “seized” just after the Norman Conquest??? This is asinine.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.