Is it just me or did the coronation portraits have the opposite effect from their intention? The portraits were supposed to celebrate a new reign, King Charles’s longed-for “slimmed down monarchy,” with only the most important members of the Windsor clan in a place of honor. And what we got was a bunch of septuagenarians, octogenarians, two 50-somethings and two of the laziest 40-somethings ever. It’s the paleness and staleness which has gotten even the most conservative royal commentators in their feelings.

The King, 74, is known to be in favour of a smaller and cheaper monarchy, but the image also highlighted the difficulties this may bring, with all but four working royals now aged over 70. There are already concerns there may be too much pressure on the Prince and Princess of Wales to take on the bulk of engagements as the ageing pool of working royals continues to shrink.

Royal author Phil Dampier today said there is a shortage of working royals for at least the next decade, with any further cuts leaving them unable to fulfil daily duties. He told MailOnline: ‘We have got a slimmed down monarchy by default because Harry and Meghan have left and Andrew is in disgrace. But there is now a real problem with most of the working royals being over seventy. It leaves just William and Kate and Edward and Sophie until their children get older. So for the next decade there is a shortage of man and woman power. You could bring in the likes of Beatrice and Eugenie to do more, but Charles has always been against that, and they are associated with their parents. We are going to have to accept that the days of having 1,600 patronages like the Queen and Prince Philip are probably over.’

Mr Dampier also said the idea of long-distance overseas royal tours may not be overly welcomed by Queen Camilla. He added: ‘Charles is very fit for his age but I’m not sure the Queen is looking forward to gruelling overseas tours to the likes of Australia, New Zealand and the Caribbean. She doesn’t like flying or the heat so it’s going to be hard for her at 75. As Princess Anne said a couple of weeks ago on Canadian TV the monarchy already looks pretty slimmed down, so let’s stop any talk of cutting it further. Otherwise the day to day work of the institution will simply be impossible to fulfil.’

[From The Daily Mail]

I continue to enjoy the fact that no one can bring themselves to acknowledge several realities about the Duke and Duchess of Sussex: that if only the Windsors had treated Meghan and Harry with respect, protection and love in the first place, the Sussexes wouldn’t have left; that the Sussexes offered to be “half-in,” only for that offer to be rejected and mocked; that the Sussexes are never coming back. Alongside these facts, there’s a refusal to acknowledge that William and Kate are lazy as hell. That’s why there’s so much panic – the Waleses refuse to do more, even though they were instrumental in driving out the charismatic Sussexes out of jealousy and racism. Oh well!

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images and Hugo Burnand for Buckingham Palace.

The Princess of Wales has been without a private secretary for nine months, by my count. She briefly hired Alison Corfield, only Corfield took one look at Kate’s Meghan look-book and busywork operation and got the f–k out of there. My point? Kate is understaffed, but she’s actually too lazy to realize it. The POW title is the second most important position in the monarchy, it comes with a huge responsibility and huge shoes to fill. Instead of hiring a team of competent professionals to help her finally achieve keenness, Kate has just wandered around doing vague, treading-water Early Years busywork and taking month-long vacations. The coronation hasn’t changed that – if anything, Kate is even more resolved to simply do nothing but preen her way through life, flapping her jazz hands and getting her hair done. Still, I do enjoy the fact that Camilla Tominey is trying to tell us not to believe what we’ve seen with our own eyes for years:

Kate’s important role: The Coronation of King Charles III appears to have strengthened Kate’s role within “The Firm” in ways many would never have imagined. For years the mother-of-three, 41, was treated by the palace powers-that-be as Prince William’s “plus one” – a royal WAG (wife and girlfriend), largely to be seen but not heard. The Accession, however, appears to have changed all that. Now elevated to a Queen-in-waiting, it seems the Princess of Wales is calling the shots and finally being listened to.

Kate’s family got invitations & Charles’s people didn’t: Take the prominent placement of her parents Michael and Carole Middleton, her sister Pippa and brother James in Westminster Abbey on Saturday. The slimmed-down guest list meant many of the King’s closest friends missed out on a coveted invitation, including Lady Pamela Hicks, who is one of only two surviving bridesmaids from the late Queen and Prince Philip’s wedding in 1947. There was only room for two members of the King’s maternal grandmother’s family, Sir Simon and Lady Caroline Bowes Lyon and only one representative of the Mountbatten clan, Countess Mountbatten.

Kate asked for extra invitations: The Daily Telegraph understands that Kate requested extra invitations for members of her team – and was given them, despite the pressure on numbers. That never used to happen, apparently.

A positive influence on William: Another reason why the Princess of Wales is being taken more seriously is because of the positive influence she has on Prince William. Both he and the King have short tempers, and just as the Queen helps to sooth and calm her husband – think Fountainpengate – Kate has a similar effect on the heir to the throne, 40.

Kate’s reaction to Meghan: Citing the example of the Oprah Winfrey interview, when the Duchess of Sussex alleged that a member of the Royal family had speculated about the colour of her unborn son’s skin, an insider revealed: “The way the princess handled it all was really quite impressive. Meghan had also thrown her under a bus over the bridesmaids dress row but her attitude was very much, ‘I think that’s the least of our worries’. She can keep a cool head when all about her are losing theirs.”

Sanguine reaction to Spare: She is thought to have had a similarly sanguine reaction to Spare, in which her brother-in-law suggested she had encouraged him to dress as a Nazi to a fancy dress party, been “reluctant” to lend Meghan her lipgloss and balked at the idea of discussing her pregnancy hormones. “Of course she’ll know what’s been said but she won’t have read any of the coverage,” added the source. “She tries to stay well away from all that stuff.”

[From The Telegraph]

LMAO “She tries to stay well away from all that stuff”– William and Kate were in the trenches for months over the Oprah interview AND Spare. Kate was still trying to convince people that Meghan made HER cry. They were being explicitly reactive to every revelation and they were openly paying very close attention to what Harry and Meghan said. Not only that, we have seen time and time again that Kate pays obsessive attention to what Meghan is doing and saying, even when Meghan isn’t even talking about the Windsors. Kate copies Meghan’s style, obviously, but Kate also copies sh-t like “the Archetypes font and color scheme.” It’s genuinely insane how much time and energy Kate has put into stalking and copying Meghan.

Still, I find it interesting that Tominey and others have pointed out that the Middletons were in attendance and some important people in Charles’s life were not. Not that I want to defend Carole and Mike Middleton, but it’s not their fault that Charles didn’t invite Pamela Hicks, the daughter of his mentor. Charles made the decision all on his own to marginalize the aristocracy and people close to his mother, father and Lord Mounbatten.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

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Kim Zolciak and Kroy Biermann’s gold leafed love story is coming to a close. Or rather, Kim is slamming that book shut and tossing it in a drawer before the feds can find it. Kim and Kroy have been married for almost 12 years. During that time, they have inundated us with their over-the-top lifestyle on their reality show, Don’t Be Tardy, selfies with them hanging all over each other and protestations that they are totally in lust with each other, dammit. And now we find out that maybe their union wasn’t as rock solid as Kroy’s impressive biceps? Color me shocked.

Kim Zolciak-Biermann and Kroy Biermann’s marriage is reportedly over.

The Bravo stars called it quits after nearly 12 years of marriage, according to TMZ.

The pair’s date of separation has been listed as April 30, per court documents obtained by TMZ. In the filing, The Real Housewives of Atlanta star described her marriage as “irretrievably broken with no hope of reconciliation.” Zolciak-Biermann is seeking primary physical custody of their children and joint legal custody; she has also asked for spousal support and the restoration of her maiden name.

Zolciak-Biermann previously denied reports of trouble in her marriage with Biermann in 2016 when rumors of friction surfaced after the now-retired NFL player was cut from the Buffalo Bills.

“These f—ing idiots that write this s— in the tabloids, all for clicks on your website,” she said at the time. “You say that Kroy and I are ‘at war’ because he’s home with me so much? Newsflash, a–holes: He played for the Atlanta Falcons for eight years so he’s always been f—ing home! Yahoo!”

She added, “On a more serious note, I really don’t appreciate people talking s— – especially s— that’s not true because I have the most incredible husband in the world.”

Zolciak-Biermann even said she was “married to the king,” also calling Biermann “the most incredible human that’s ever walked this planet.”

[From People]

Even though Kim filed because her marriage was, “irretrievably broken with no hope of reconciliation,” Hollywood Life reported that the couple is still living in that big ol’ Atlanta manse they’re clinging on to by claw or by crook. There’s plenty of room, I’m sure they just pick a room and shout MINE! Plus, they probably had to sell off all their belongings to keep the house, so there’s nothing to throw at each other.

This is about money, too. Kim’s filing is very specific. She filed on May 1 and cited April 30th as their separation date. Guess what else got filed on May 1? A $1.1 million tax bill the couple owes to the IRS. The IRS doesn’t care if you’re a Bravolebrity, just ask Al Capone. So even though Kim and Kroy pulled some grift to get their mansion off the auction block, they aren’t dancing around that tax bill. And that isn’t the end of their issues. They owe the state of Georgia $15,000 as well. Apparently Kroy was the family’s manager. So with Kim’s filing dates, it looks like she’s trying to legally maneuver herself away from some of the fiscal responsibility. But Kroy’s petition just dropped and his said that Kim “must maintain all financial documents… including all income records, tax records, expense records and more.” So they are blaming each other. Plus they both want sole physical custody of their minor kids, they have Brielle, 26, Ariana, 21, Kroy, 11, Kade, 10 and twins Kaia and Kane, nine. Kim wants joint legal custody and Kroy wants sole legal custody. This is getting messy fast.

Kroy hasn’t been scrubbed from Kim’s Instagram… yet

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In 2019, E. Jean Carroll covered an issue of New York Magazine to promote and excerpt a book she had written. In the book, she described at least two sexual assaults, one by Les Moonves (then head of CBS) and one by Donald Trump. Carroll described being raped by Trump in the dressing room of Bergdorf Goodman in the 1990s. At the time, she told friends what had happened but she didn’t go to the police or even to Bergdorf’s security. Even then, she knew that Trump would try to bury her. In 2019, Trump dismissed Carroll’s claim the same way he dismissed so many of the other women he preyed on, assaulted, raped and harassed: he called Carroll a liar and said she wasn’t attractive enough to be assaulted, and she wasn’t “his type.” Well, Carroll sued him in civil court for assault, rape and defamation after that. The civil trial had been happening for weeks, and the case went to the jury on Tuesday. It only took the jury three hours to come back with a unanimous verdict: Trump is liable for sexual abuse and defamation.

A Manhattan jury on Tuesday found former President Donald J. Trump liable for the sexual abuse and defamation of the magazine writer E. Jean Carroll and awarded her $5 million in damages in a widely watched civil trial that sought to apply the accountability of the #MeToo era to a dominant political figure.

The federal jury of six men and three women found that Mr. Trump, 76, defamed Ms. Carroll when he posted a statement on his Truth Social website in October, calling her case “a complete con job” and “a Hoax and a lie.”

The jury, in returning its verdict shortly after 3 p.m. said Ms. Carroll had not proved, by a preponderance of the evidence, that Mr. Trump had raped her, as she had long claimed.

Ms. Carroll sued the former president last year, accusing him of shoving her against a wall and raping her in a dressing room the luxury department store Bergdorf Goodman in Manhattan, in the mid 1990s.

Although more than a dozen women have accused Mr. Trump of sexual misconduct over the years, allegations he has always denied, Ms. Carroll’s case is the first of those claims to be successfully tested before a jury.

The jury also found that Ms. Carroll had proved that she was injured as a result of Trump’s publication of his denial of her accusations on his Truth Social account in October 2022. The jury determined that Ms. Carroll had proved, by clear and convincing evidence, that Mr. Trump knew his statement was false when he said her accusation was a hoax, a legal standard known as “actual malice.”

[From The New York Times]

One grotesque part of this trial was the introduction of Trump’s filmed deposition, where he mistook a photo of Carroll from the 1990s as Marla Maples, proving that Carroll actually was his type (blonde, beautiful, leggy). In another part of his deposition, he was asked about the Access Hollywood tape, where Trump told Billy Bush: “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything, grab them by the p-ssy. You can do anything.” When Trump was asked if that was what he said, Trump replied: “Well, historically, that’s true with stars. If you look over the last million years, I guess that’s been largely true. Unfortunately or fortunately.” Unfortunately or fortunately.

Anyway, I’m extremely proud of E. Jean Carroll and I hope she’s safe and secure. I hope she’s surrounded by friends and family and that she’s protecting herself. She knew that suing Trump would be a long, arduous process and it was, but she stuck with it and found a sliver of justice. It’s not even close to “enough,” but it’s something.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Cover Images.

Didn’t you think that the Prince and Princess of Wales would need a month-long holiday to recover from their exhausting coronation schedule? They had to work five days in a row! Well, make that SIX days in a row. Seriously, Peg and Buttons are working themselves to the bone this month. I can only imagine how many separate “events” will be counted in this work blitz. In any case, on the sixth day of keenery, my keen love gave to me: a pussybow at a palace garden party! On Tuesday, William, Kate and the Edinburghs hosted a garden party in sunny weather at Buckingham Palace.

Kate and Sophie both repeated blue dresses which they had previously worn at Royal Ascot (on different years). I remember Kate’s Elie Saab look from 2019 – I called it Edwardian cosplay at the time, and I can’t say that I like it more after four years. It is just so fussy, the combination of the high neckline with the bow, plus the lace and the tea-length skirt. It’s too pinched – one of those details needed to be edited out, probably the bow. Of course, Kate looks positively modern (for the early 20th century) compared to Sophie’s deeply unflattering ruffled catastrophe. I remember this look too – she just wore it at Ascot last year, and I still haven’t found a designer ID for it. No designer wants to claim it.

Since there’s nothing else to talk about, let’s keep talking about Kate’s style. She didn’t even bother styling the Elie Saab differently this time around – she literally pulled out the same pair of Gianvito Rossi pumps in silver, with the same Philip Treacy hat from her 2019 Ascot appearance too. I double-checked the 2019 photos – she’s even carrying the same Elie Saab clutch!! The only difference: the earrings. In 2019, she wore aquamarine-and-diamond drop earrings (which looked much better with the dress). On Tuesday, she wore blue topaz hoop earrings by Kiki McDonough. Who convinced her that a pale blue dress (with sparkles) needed matching silver accessories?

Also, why is Kate repeating an Elie Saab dress at the palace? I thought royals were only supposed to wear BRITISH LABELS. What’s that? Oh, I’m being told that rule only applies to Prince Harry.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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Simone Biles and Jonathan Owens had their big wedding in Cabo San Lucas over the weekend. We were treated to a few photos then, as well as a peek into her dress fitting, but now we get the full effect. Simone shared a lot of great photos and details with Vogue Weddings. It looks like they had the best time!

Simone Biles wasn’t content with just one wedding dress, so she opted for four during her destination wedding to husband Jonathan Owens.

The Olympic gymnast, 26, wed the football player for a second time in Cabo San Lucas last weekend.

Biles kicked off her wedding celebrations in at her rehearsal in a Galia Lahav JILL mini. The flirty mini dress had spaghetti straps, an asymmetrical hemline and beaded fringe, which made it the perfect dress for dancing.

For her wedding ceremony on May 6, she wore a custom Galia Lahav GIMAYA dress that she added a slit to. She told Vogue that she wanted to appear taller, and the slit was the perfect way to do that.

For her reception, Biles changed into yet another Galia Lahav dress, this one a custom MAYA. The body-hugging dress featured sheer panels to bring a little more sexiness to her evening.

She wrapped up her night with a party dress fit for dancing. She wore a custom Galia Lahav G-502 that was covered in sparkles and caught the light with every move.

The four-dress rotation was no surprise for Biles’ fans and followers, given that she revealed the big news on Instagram a couple of weeks ago during a Q&A. At the time, someone asked how many dresses she planned to wear for her big day, and she dropped the “dramatic” news that she picked up four of them.

[From People]

Vogue Weddings has the full spread, with pictures of the getting ready process, ceremony, and reception. As we know, Simone’s ceremony dress was a custom Galia Lahav ballgown. Actually all Simone’s looks were by the designer — her sequined rehearsal dinner minidress, her ceremony gown, her reception dress, and party dress. (I didn’t realize she was counting the rehearsal dinner dress as one of the four dresses). Her reception dress was similar to her ceremony dress with the flowers and lace, but was form-fitting and probably easier to move in. I can’t find any photos of Simone’s fourth dress though! Nobu made the main cake, which was red velvet. And Jonathan also requested an ice cream cake (as would I), which was from Dairy Queen. They had a beautiful wedding and it looked like a lot of fun AND they had ice cream cake. Honestly, sounds perfect.

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Robert DeNiro split from his second wife, Grace Hightower, in 2018. They had a messy divorce and they fought over money, although most of the mess wasn’t tabloid fodder. I always assumed that was because DeNiro was and is so beloved by his peers and by all of New York – like, the New York tabloid media doesn’t even want to cover some more gossip-worthy aspects of DeNiro’s life. Which probably explains the distinct lack of reporting around DeNiro’s relationship with Tiffany Chen, whom he met in 2015 and apparently started “dating” when he was still married to Grace Hightower. Chen was seen months ago with what looked like a baby bump. Now DeNiro has confirmed that he welcomed his seventh child at the age of 79.

For Robert De Niro’s upcoming movie “About My Father,” ET Canada sat down with the legendary actor to chat about fatherhood. When asked what his love language is, the famous father, 79, told ET Canada’s Brittnee Blair that he believes “in being loving with [his] kids,” despite sometimes having “to be stern about stuff.”

“I mean, there’s no way around it with kids. I don’t like to have to lay down the law and stuff like that. But, [sometimes] you just have no choice,” he explained. “And any parent, I think, would say the same thing. You always want to do the right thing by the children and give them the benefit of the doubt but sometimes you can’t.”

Then, when Blair said, “I know you have six kids,” De Niro corrected her, saying, “Seven, actually.”

“I just had a baby,” he revealed.

[From ET Canada]

DeNiro’s reps confirmed to the AP that he had welcomed his seventh child. His other kids include: “Drena, 51, and Raphael, 46, from his first marriage; and twins, Julian and Aaron, 27; Elliot, 24; and Helen Grace, 11, from his second marriage.” On a red carpet last night, DeNiro also said that the pregnancy was “planned.” I would assume that means that his girlfriend wanted a baby and he was like “sure.” Yeah. I believe in reproductive freedom and everyone making their own choices about when to have babies or whether to have babies, but good lord – a newborn at the age of 79? A 51-year age difference between his oldest and his youngest? This is some Biblical sh-t.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.

Tom Hiddleston & Mark Hamill will pair up in the adaptation of Stephen King’s The Life of Chuck. Hiddles plus Luke Skywalker?!? [JustJared]
Taylor Swift’s clique has embraced Matt Healy. [LaineyGossip]
Shemar Moore called out CBS for canceling SWAT. [Dlisted]
After which, CBS suddenly found the money to give SWAT another season. [Seriously OMG]
Seriously, this season of Ted Lasso is so bad. [Pajiba]
Tiger Woods really treats women like crap. [Jezebel]
I will throw up if you make me describe this TikTok trend. [Starcasm]
Oscar-winner Michelle Yeoh looks amazing. [GFY]
Funny “coming to America” stories. [Buzzfeed]
Big love to the Turkish LGBT community, your leader is a nutcase. [Towleroad]
I love Sandra Oh but these bangs are not good. [RCFA]

So, I don’t know how long it takes to drive from Westminster Abbey to Heathrow, but I imagine the journey would be a lot quicker if you were being driven by a professional driver/security guard and most of the streets had been cleared because of a coronation. All I know is that the British media tracked Prince Harry’s every move in the UK for all “28 hours,” and that man left the Abbey quickly and made it to Heathrow in time to catch a 3:45 pm flight. According to the Telegraph, Harry did not go straight to the Heathrow though – their sources claim that Harry made a brief stop at Buckingham Palace in between the Abbey and Heathrow, but that he didn’t spend any time with his family. The Telegraph reports: “It is understood that the visit was for logistical reasons. It allowed him to take a moment out of the public gaze following the two-hour Abbey service. He did not join the Royal family for official Coronation portraits and is not known to have seen or spoken to his relatives.” Something tells me we’ll find out later that he did have a reason to stop at the Palace. Meanwhile, Katie Nicholl’s royal sources claim that… the family doesn’t even know why Harry came. Because his father invited him?

It was the briefest of appearances but after much deliberation and creating a headache for organizers over whether he would attend, Prince Harry flew to Britain for King Charles’s coronation after all. On Monday, the Telegraph reported that Harry even visited Buckingham Palace during his time in London, “slipping in and out of the monarchy’s headquarters briefly without seeing the royal family.” However, there was no meeting with his father, and he didn’t exchange a single word with his brother Prince William during the fleeting trip.

According to one family friend, Harry’s 28 hours in the country has left his family “wondering why Harry bothered to come at all.”

“One makes one’s choices,” said a source close to the royal family. “To be honest there wasn’t much talk of Harry at all. The focus was very much on the occasion.”

His fleeting visit has left the family underwhelmed, according to the family friend, and his father “saddened.”

“Beatrice and Eugenie are the only ones who really speak to Harry. He’s actually very close to Eugenie and Jack, but there’s very little if any contact with the rest of his family who are still reeling from what he has said and done,” according to the source.

Harry was literally left out in the cold and was seen waiting on the pavement outside the Abbey while he waited for his official car to take him to the palace. “All the other royals and VIPs were taken off in official cars, but Harry was left on his own, waiting for his car. It was actually really sad to see him all by himself,’ an eye-witness told Vanity Fair.

[From Vanity Fair]

“To be honest there wasn’t much talk of Harry at all” except for this VF article and the five hundred articles in the Express, the three hundred articles in the Mail, the dozens of post-Chubbly analysis pieces in the Telegraph all focused on Harry, and the entire coronation broadcast moving off King Charles to cover Harry’s arrival at the Abbey, as well as British and American commentators focusing on Harry’s presence at the Abbey. Other than all of that wall-to-wall hysteria and obsession, sure, there wasn’t much talk of Harry.

It’s so particularly British, this gaslighting bullsh-t of “why did he even come” and “the king is so sad that Harry didn’t stick around, even though the king didn’t invite Harry to take part in anything other than the crowning.” Charles got exactly what he wanted: his younger son at the Abbey, Meghan and the kids staying in Montecito, whites-only coronation portraits and an all-white balcony. The king also wanted to pull focus from his mixed-race grandson’s birthday, don’t forget that.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

In recent months/years, there are always conspiracies about Prince William and Kate and the real state of their marriage and whether they would ever divorce. I maintain my belief that they will stay married up until the day that William sees a better option for himself and a way to extricate himself without harming his reputation. Rose Hanbury isn’t the “solution” – I actually feel slightly bad for Rose, she’s a well-connected aristocrat living in a palatial estate and she has no desire (from what I can see) to upend her life to be the next Princess of Wales. She’s constantly being dragged into these conversations basically because she allegedly f–ked William out of boredom. So, William and Kate will stay married, and they will likely continue to live separate lives.

I also believe that William began distancing himself from the Middletons several years ago, specifically in May/June 2021. That was when he ordered Kate to stay away from the Diana-statue unveiling and the Middletons went on the attack against William. Remember this unhinged piece from 2021? Yeah. I wonder if that’s what’s happening again, because all of sudden, the Middletons want to remind everyone that they are central to the well-being of the monarchy. They are the keen linchpins! From Richard Kay’s piece in the Daily Mail, “The Middletons are at the heart of our new royal order… This may have been his father’s day, but the prominence given to William’s in-laws shows that they are now absolutely central to the future wellbeing of the Royal Family.”

The Middletons were in the seventh row at the Abbey: Given that they are grandparents of the next king but one, it was understandable that Kate should want both her mother, a former flight attendant who was brought up in a council flat, and her father, a one-time aircraft despatcher, close at hand. What was surprising was the presence of her brother and sister when pressure of space meant so many more familiar names were absent from the guest list.”

The Middletons are the future of the monarchy: Beyond this very visible picture of dizzying social mobility that the Middletons represent, their presence — more than perhaps anyone else’s at Saturday’s ceremony — is a very clear sign about the future direction of the monarchy. Charles may be on the throne but by including William’s in-laws and in such a conspicuous position in the Abbey, there was a tacit acknowledgement of the role the Middletons are undoubtedly going to play. So while this was his father’s day, it was also the beginning of a new royal order.

Prepare yourselves for more Flop Tours: The King and Camilla will lean heavily on William and Kate in the years ahead. Indeed, it is already possible to look not too much further into the future to see the day when the King and Queen step back from overseas tours, for instance, just as Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip did. This would mean the Prince and Princess taking on those visits to distant Commonwealth countries and far-flung realms, in the way that Charles did when he was Prince of Wales, easing the burden on his parents. When that happens — and in the case of the Queen, who finds international travel gruelling, this may be sooner than people realise — it will be Mike and Carole Middleton who are called on to help out by taking care of Prince George and his siblings Charlotte and Louis.

The Middletons love to help out: Kate’s parents have been ‘brilliant’, according to friends, at stepping in and helping out, always willing to drop everything at a moment’s notice. Mrs Middleton’s decision to step back from the day-to-day running of her online party paraphernalia business will free up still more time. Carole has always been just ‘Granny’ to Kate’s three children although they have, of course, been told everything about their other grandmother, Princess Diana.

William needs the Middletons now that Harry is gone: The split with Prince Harry, whose graceless contribution to his father’s Coronation saw him leave for the U.S. directly after the Abbey service, is another significant factor in placing Carole and Mike front and centre as the new royal order takes shape. Even without the disgraced Prince Andrew, Charles has continued to enjoy the active support of his sister Anne and brother Edward in picking up the royal slack. There is no such back-up for William, who had always hoped that his brother would be at his side, not just when he was Prince of Wales but also King. With the prospect of any kind of reconciliation fast disappearing, William has no one but Kate to support him through the challenges ahead.

William needs to ease his burden: And, since Charles has admitted he would have struggled to cope without Camilla to encourage and reassure him, there is an understanding between father and son that anything William can do to ease the burden will be granted. That’s where the Middletons come in.

Bill Middleton: After his and Kate’s wedding in 2011, William was more determined than ever to transpose the Middletons’ way of doing things into his own marriage. It shows most clearly in the way their three children have been raised. It helps, of course, that they are not the offspring of a damaged marriage.

Harry changed William & Charles’s relationship: Harry’s decision first to quit Britain and royal life and then to use his exile to mount attacks on his father, stepmother, brother and sister-in-law brought about a rapid rapprochement between Charles and William. The relationship between the two had not truly been close for years: William often felt he and Kate were simply there to inject an X-factor into royal life. Father and son have short tempers. But now there was cause for a joint enterprise — both Charles and William feared that Harry’s real and imagined complaints about royal life and the treatment of Meghan was doing serious damage to the royal brand.

[From The Daily Mail]

“There is an understanding between father and son that anything William can do to ease the burden will be granted…” What is this burden you speak of? Is the burden in the room with us now? Because William does f–k all and he’s always been lazy as hell, but sure, I’ll buy that Charles lets William do whatever he wants. This is an old-school “promise to be keen” layered into a story about how Carole and Mike are the linchpins of the monarchy because… they’ll look after their grandchildren when William and Kate are making asses out of themselves overseas. As I said, William will stay in this marriage until he sees an easy way out, which may never come. He was once close to the Middletons but in recent years, he’s seemingly kept them at arm’s length. For good reason. I think the Middleton operation has gone tits-up in several different ways, not just Party Pieces on the brink of bankruptcy, but… it feels like there are other shoes left to drop.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.