One of my tweeps is Kara Calavera, who watched Prince Harry’s 60 Minutes interview and tweeted out: “Prince Harry dragging Camilla up by her horse hairs, letting the world know she sold stories about him and his brother to bolster her own image. I love it.” I’m still laughing about “dragging Camilla up by her horse hairs.” Anyway, yes, Harry dragged Camilla. He dragged Camilla in the ITV interview and the 60 Minutes interview. In 60 Minutes, he actually said these words:

“The need for her to rehabilitate her image made her dangerous because of the connections that she was forging within the British press. There was open willingness on both sides to trade information. With a family built on hierarchy and with her on the way to being queen consort there was going to be people or bodies left on the street because of that…If you are led to believe as a member of the family that having positive stories written about you is going to improve your reputation or increase your chances of being accepted by the British public, then that’s what you’re going to do.

[From 60 Minutes via Celebitchy story]

I bring this up because the Independent had a curious cover-story reaction to Harry’s Spare promotional blitz. Their cover story was to accuse Harry of being “kidnapped by a cult of psychotherapy.”

A reconciliation with Prince Harry is “impossible” because the King, Queen Consort and Prince William fear anything they say will be made public, The Independent understands. A source close to the royal family said the King, Camilla and William believe the situation will remain unchanged while the Duke of Sussex remains effectively “kidnapped by a cult of psychotherapy and Meghan”.

“They are trapped,” said the source. “They really can’t engage because everything they say will be shared with the media. It is impossible to have a conversation or write a letter because of the risk that anything they say being put in the public domain by Harry, potentially for commercial benefit. There has been a complete breakdown of trust.”

The royal source said: “They aren’t going to apologise because they don’t recognise Harry’s version of events.”

The source also likened Harry’s removal to California, and isolation from the rest of the family, to joining a cult – a comparison likely to prove explosive.

“He has been kidnapped by a cult of psychotherapy and Meghan. It is impossible for him to return in these circumstances.”

[From The Independent]

So this story is explicitly Camilla and William’s reaction to Harry’s interviews and the early excerpts from Spare. They have no answer to Harry’s very specific accusations of violence and briefing the media, so Camilla and William are united in thinking that Harry has simply had too much therapy. Plus, it’s all Meghan’s fault. Nevermind the fact that Harry looks and sounds happier and healthier than he ever has in his entire life, that he looks like a man who has been unburdened by an enormous weight on his shoulders. Camilla and William are like: who is this happy man who is doing the work? He’s been kidnapped! He should back in this miserable, dreary island.

Anyway, you know how I mentioned Camilla’s horse hairs? Omid Scobie tweeted this:

“Kidnapped by a cult of psychotherapy and Meghan”

An unusually tabloid-style royal front page for The Independent. Former Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday editor-in-chief Geordie Greig—a close friend of Camilla, the Queen Consort—was recently announced as the paper’s new editor. pic.twitter.com/JrKNfTOwCo

— Omid Scobie (@scobie) January 10, 2023

Photos courtesy of Cover Images, Avalon Red.

As I’m writing this, I still haven’t read Prince Harry’s Spare. It seems like Harry devoted a section to everything that happened around Prince Philip’s funeral, including a violent meeting with his brother and father. Keep in mind, this was April 2021, just weeks after the Sussexes’ Oprah interview aired. Just days before the Oprah interview aired, the Times of London reported on Jason Knauf’s letter to Simon Case – a letter from 2018 – in which Knauf claimed Meghan kept looking at Kensington Palace staffers and making them cry. Knauf and Kensington Palace conveniently leaked the letter just before the Oprah interview to make Meghan sound like an angry bully. At Philip’s funeral, apparently William and Charles brought up the bullsh-t bullying accusation, and here’s what Harry wrote:

Harry claimed Charles and William were “delusional” over allegations Meghan had bullied staff and he and his wife filed a 25-page report rebutting the allegations.

He said: “Meg was apparently a bully, that was the latest vicious campaign they’d helped orchestrate. It was so shocking, so egregious, that even after Meg and I demolished their lie with a 25-page, evidence-filled report to human resources, I was going to have trouble simply shrugging that one off.”

Blaming his family for dealing with the media, he added: “They began talking over each other. We’ve been down this road a hundred times, they said. You’re delusional, Harry. But they were the delusional ones.”

[From Yahoo]

I hope there’s even more context for the “25-page” filing to human resources. Hell, I hope Harry includes more details about just how Kensington Palace staff treated Meghan and how she was victimized by staffers just as much as she was victimized by William and Kate. I kind of wish Meghan and Harry had just released the 25-page rebuttal publicly at the time, in 2021. Then we wouldn’t have had to spend the past year and a half listening to asinine royal reporters say “Harry and Meghan never sued the Times about it, the accusations are true, she’s a bully!”

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid.

Tom Hanks’ new film, A Man Called Otto comes out this Friday. As I mentioned, I loved the book upon which this movie is based and think Hanks will make a good American version of lead character. In the film, there are flashbacks to a younger Otto. Apparently, producers Tom and Rita Wilson thought their son Truman Hanks, who is an actor, would be well cast as the younger Otto, so they hired him for the role. I guess someone cried “nepotism hire!” which, of course, it was, and now Daddy Hanks has entered the Nepo Baby discussion. He said it’s fine for kids to work in the “family business,” because everyone does it.

Tom Hanks has weighed in on the ongoing debate around nepotism in Hollywood, with the A Man Called Otto star taking the stance that his and other families working in entertainment are creative businesses.

The actor was promoting the upcoming film, which sees his son Truman playing a younger version of the Oscar winner’s character, Otto. Hanks’ wife, Rita Wilson, co-wrote and performed an original song for the movie and also produced the film alongside her husband. While speaking to Reuters (via The Sun) in a video interview shared Wednesday, Hanks explained his position on having his four kids — all of whom he says are “very creative” and ” involved in some brand of storytelling” — working in the same, or an adjacent, industry as him.

“Look this is a family business. This is what we’ve been doing forever. It’s what all of our kids grew up in,” he said. “If we were a plumbing supply business or if we ran the florist shop down the street, the whole family would be putting in time at some point, even if it was just inventory at the end of the year.”

Hanks has two children with his first wife — Colin and Elizabeth Hanks — and another two, Chet and Truman, with Wilson. All work in some arm of entertainment to various degrees, whether it be as actors, producers, cinematographers or musicians. Hanks noted that regardless of their last name, for him, it’s ultimately the quality of their work that matters most and speaks the loudest.

“The thing that doesn’t change no matter what happens, no matter what your last name is, is whether it works or not,” he said. “That’s the issue anytime any of us go off and try to tell a fresh story or create something that has a beginning and a middle and an end. Doesn’t matter what our last names are. We have to do the work in order to make that a true and authentic experience for the audience.”

For Hanks, “that’s a much bigger task than worrying about whether anybody’s going to try to scathe us or not.”

[From The Hollywood Reporter via DListed]

Tom should have sat this one out. Especially since he was trying to take such a huge leap with his shoelaces tied together like this. Nepotism is the exact opposite of bringing family in to help out or sacrifice during vital/crunch time to keep the family business afloat. A Man Called Otto wasn’t going to fold if Truman wasn’t cast. Nepo Babies are the ones who benefit from the business, not the other way around. There are family business analogies Tom could have made that would have worked here and he walked right past all of them to pick the one that failed. Plus, nothing proves the Nepo Baby point more than to have Daddy coming to Truman’s defense on his hiring. Good lord, at least let Truman defend himself. And lastly, “The thing that doesn’t change no matter what happens, no matter what your last name is, is whether it works or not,” Tom is going to say this with a straight face knowing he’s defending Chet Hanks along with the rest of his Nepo Offspring?

The funniest part of all this is that Franklin Leonard, for whom I hold a great deal of respect, actual had a decent argument for the casting of Truman in this film. Tom should have retracted his answer and sent Franklin a fruit basket.

When an actor’s child is cast as the younger version of them, it’s arguably not nepotism, if only because the physical similarity is inevitably part of their merit. https://t.co/vDzIQ55pZe

— Franklin Leonard (@franklinleonard) January 5, 2023

Embed from Getty Images

Photo credit: Justin Ng/Avalon, Getty Images and Cover Images

For years, we were told that the Duchess of Sussex “made Kate cry.” For years, the story kept shifting about exactly what happened and what was said. Was it about bridesmaids’ dresses? Tights? How Meghan treated Kensington Palace staff? Even when Meghan corrected the record in the Oprah interview – that Kate had actually made her cry before the wedding – we were still lacking specifics of exactly what happened. Enter Prince Harry and his memoir. This is one of the top stories at the Daily Mail – their summary of Harry’s account of the whole fracas. The Mail is trying desperately to put an anti-Sussex spin on this, but it definitely feels like Harry was writing this based on the actual text messages between Meghan and Kate, and Kate does not come across well.

Harry has given his first full account of the infamous bridesmaid dress fitting at the heart of ‘Megxit’, claiming Princess Charlotte ‘cried when she tried it on at home’. Directly referencing his niece – a breach of privacy that is sure to anger his brother William – Harry insists the incident was driven by his sister-in-law Kate, who appeared irritated that it had taken Meghan a day to get back to her about the problem.

The disagreement between the two women was, he claims, further exacerbated by Kate’s unwillingness to visit Meghan’s tailor at Kensington Palace and suggestions that they hold a party for the page boys when his bride-to-be was busy dealing with a row with her father, Thomas Markle.

Opening his latest salvo, the prince writes that Meghan received a text from Kate four days before their wedding saying there was a problem with the dresses for the bridesmaids and they needed altering. They were ‘French couture’ and had been hand-sewn from measurements only – without a fitting – so ‘it wasn’t a big shock’ that they might not fit perfectly, he says.

Harry writes: ‘Meg didn’t reply to Kate straight away. Yes, she had endless wedding-related texts, but mostly she was dealing with the chaos surrounding her father. So the next morning she texted Kate that our tailor was standing by.’ She told her that his name was Ajay and he was ‘at the palace’.

‘This wasn’t sufficient,’ Harry goes on to write darkly. After setting up a time to speak later that afternoon, Harry writes that Kate complained: ‘Charlotte’s dress is too big, too long, too baggy. She cried when she tried it on at home.’

Meghan snapped back: ‘Right, and I told you the tailor has been standing by since 8am. Here. At KP. Can you take Charlotte to have it altered, as the other mums are doing?’

According to Harry’s version of events, Kate replied: ‘No, all the dresses need to be remade.’ And said she had discussed the issue with her ‘own wedding designer’ who agreed.

Harry writes: ‘Meg asked if Kate was aware of what was going on right now. With her father. Kate said she was well aware, but the dresses. And the wedding is in four days!’

‘Yes, Kate, I know….’ his fiancée replied sharply. He also claims that his sister-in-law had ‘problems with the way Meg was planning her wedding. Something about a party for the page boys? It went back and forth’.

The prince reports his wife as saying: ‘I’m not sure what else to say. If the dress doesn’t fit then please take Charlotte to see Ajay. He’s been waiting all day.’

‘Fine’, Kate is said to have replied.

Harry states that he arrived home a short time later, which suggests that he and his ghost writer were given an account of the actual conversation by Meghan, to find his fiancée ‘on the floor sobbing’. While he says he was ‘horrified’ to see her so upset, he didn’t think it a catastrophe as emotions were understandably high. He told Meghan that ‘Kate hadn’t meant any harm’. He suggests his point was proved when the then Duchess of Cambridge came round the next morning with flowers and a card to say sorry.

Harry makes a point of writing that Meghan’s best friend, Lindsay, was in the kitchen when she turned up as if to suggest he can prove his version of events.

[From The Daily Mail]

As I said before, it’s giving Wedding Karen. “Charlotte’s dress is too big, too long, too baggy. She cried when she tried it on at home.” Jesus H. And Meghan had already given her the solution when Kate texted that! Meghan had *already* told Kate to take Charlotte to the tailor at KP. Kate is an utter drama queen, my God. I hope Meghan’s texts were that curt as well – I can really feel Meghan’s annoyance at Kate’s melodrama. I love the Mail’s melodrama too – “a breach of privacy” for mentioning Charlotte’s name! Literally, Charlotte’s name was always mentioned in all of the stories pushed by Kate.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid, Instar.

Embed from Getty Images

This is just a small fraction of the crazy bullsh-t that went down on Friday night as Kevin McCarthy finally won the speakership. [Jezebel]
I love Michelle Yeoh but this is too much “look.” [Go Fug Yourself]
Brazil is having its own insurrectionist mess. [Buzzfeed]
This pizza-destroying cat doesn’t look the least bit guilty. [Dlisted]
I loved the video of the twins watching Whitney Houston. [LaineyGossip]
The true story behind 1923. [Pajiba]
Damar Hamlin cheered for the Bills from his hospital bed. [Seriously OMG]
Olivia Wilde is the most-watched female director on Letterboxd. [Gawker]
Keke Palmer can’t wait to hold her baby. [Just Jared]
A Gold Rush couple are back together. [Starcasm]
Amelia Hamlin is desperate for attention. And apples. [Egotastic]
No rainbow products in Algeria. [Towleroad]

Rep. Hudson, R-N.C., left, pulls Rep. Rogers, R-Ala., as he confronts Rep. Matt Gaetz, R-Fla., during the 14th round of voting for speaker as the House meets for the fourth day to try and elect a speaker in Washington, Friday, Jan. 6, 2023. (@AP Photo/@andyharnik) pic.twitter.com/ok3K8ERtfU

— Andrew Harnik (@andyharnik) January 7, 2023

At some point, perhaps this week, we can discuss the British media’s irresponsible words and phrasing when it comes to matters of assault and abuse. When Prince William assaulted his brother in Nottingham Cottage, it was not a “fight,” nor was it a case of “fisticuffs.” It was an assault. It was violence. It was a man physically abusing his younger brother. I bring this up because, as I’ve long believed, William put his hands on Harry following Prince Philip’s funeral in 2021. The Windsors were practically gleeful about getting Harry alone- especially just weeks after the Oprah interview – and Charles and William ganged up on Harry. It was there that William “lunged” at Harry.

Prince William twice lunged at brother Harry in a physical bust-up in front of dad Charles just after Prince Philip’s funeral. Harry says in his new book Spare that a “steaming” and “shouting” ­William “grabbed my shirt” as the three of them held peace talks in the gardens of Frogmore Cottage in April 2021.

Harry claims the pair and their dad Charles went on a half-hour stroll, arriving at a gothic ruin near Frogmore Cottage in Windsor. They discussed his Oprah Winfrey interview from weeks earlier. Harry claims he tried to reason with his brother and father, and wanted to discuss bullying allegations against wife Meghan. But they weren’t listening, he said, and he was turning away to say goodbye.

He says William, who was “really steaming”, shouted at him: “You never came to us. You never came to me.” Harry expressed his feelings over their Megxit agreement being “violated” when William shouted he should “take it up with Granny”. Harry wrote: “I waved a hand, disgusted, but he lunged, grabbed my shirt. ‘Listen to me, Harold’. I pulled away, refused to meet his gaze. He forced me to look into his eyes. Listen to me, Harold, listen! I love you, Harold! I want you to be happy.”

Harry claims he fired back with “I love you too…but your stubbornness is extraordinary!” He pulled out of William’s grasp but claims his brother grabbed him again and twisted him to maintain eye contact. He says in the book: “Harold, you must listen to me! I just want you to be happy, Harold. I swear I swear on Mummy’s life. He stopped. I stopped. Pa stopped. He’d gone there. He’d used the secret code, the universal password. Ever since we were boys those three words were to be used only in times of extreme crisis.”

Harry said he was ready at that point to fly back to the US to be with Meghan. He wrote: “Willy wasn’t quite ready to accept defeat.. ‘I’ve felt properly sick and ill after everything that’s happened and, and I swear to you now on Mummy’s life that I just want you to be happy’.

Harry added: “My voice broke as I told him softly: I really don’t think you do.”

The Sun on Sunday understands that William did hug his brother and told him “I love you”.

[From The Sun]

In retrospect, it should have just been Charles and Harry taking a walk and making some of the first steps towards working on some of their issues. Including William in this ensured that Charles and William could gang up on Harry, and then William would get in Harry’s space and his face. The description of William grabbing Harry is upsetting, especially since just two years before, William had violently assaulted Harry and thrown him to the floor.

In this section of the book, Harry apparently reflects on how bizarre it is that the family reunited for a funeral: “Now I saw that even our finest moments, and my best memories, somehow involved death. Our lives were built on death, our brightest days shadowed by it. Looking back, I didn’t see spots of time, but dances with death.” He looked around at Windsor Castle and wondered if the family was a death cult (hint: they are!).

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Instar, WENN and cover courtesy of The Sun.

So, from what I’ve seen, several British tabloids are running with “Prince Harry backtracks on royal racism claims” today. This is because in Harry’s ITV interview, he was asked about the Oprah interview and the claims he and Meghan made about mystery Windsors speaking about the baby’s skin color, etc. Harry said, to Tom Bradby, that he never used the word “racism” and that he believes there is a big issue of unconscious bias in the Windsor clan.

Prince Harry has denied that he and Meghan ever accused the royal family of racism, arguing that there is a “difference between racism and unconscious bias”. In an interview with ITV News presenter Tom Bradby, Harry was asked about the couple’s sit-down with Oprah Winfrey last year.

Meghan claimed to Winfrey that when she was pregnant with Archie there were “concerns and conversations about how dark his skin might be when he’s born”. In Sunday’s interview, Bradby said: “In the Oprah interview, you accuse members of your family of racism…”

“No,” Harry interjected. “The British press said that, right? Did Meghan ever mention ‘they’re racists’?” Bradby said: “She said there were troubling comments about Archie’s skin colour. Wouldn’t you describe that as essentially racist?”

Harry responded that he would not describe the incident as racist, “not having lived within that family”.

“The difference between racism and unconscious bias… the two things are different,” he said.

Unconscious bias is “the tendency of us as humans to act in ways that are prompted by a range of assumptions and biases that we are not aware of”, a University of Edinburgh definition says. Harry continued: “Once it’s been acknowledged or pointed out to you as an individual, otherwise an institution, that you have unconscious bias, you therefore have an opportunity to learn and grow from that… otherwise, unconscious bias then moves into the category of racism.”

Harry then referred to an incident in which Lady Susan Hussey, a member of the Buckingham Palace household, repeatedly asked black British charity boss Ngozi Fulani where she “really came from”.

“What happened to Ngozi Fulani is a very good example of the environment within the institution,” he added. Harry also said that he and Meghan “love” Lady Susan. He said: “We think she’s great. I also know that she never meant any harm at all. But the response from the British press and from people online because of the stories that they wrote was horrendous, absolutely horrendous.”

[From ITV]

Yeah… from what I’ve seen of the ITV interview, this was the biggest head-scratcher. I think it’s important to remember that Harry tailored his answers and comments to the audience, and he knows that the British audience will react differently than an American audience. That’s the explanation I have for this mess – this is Harry soft-launching a nuanced conversation about the “bias” within British society and the British royal family, because “unconscious bias” is less incendiary than “racism.” But yeah… I think we’re past that. I think Harry should just say: these people are racist, these incidents are about race and racism.

I truly did not have Harry caping for Susan Hussey on my bingo card either, especially given that the Hussey debacle was a perfect example of the entrenched RACISM within the British monarchy. It was also yet another example of the Windsors letting a victim of racism twist in the wind (for WEEKS) while they shielded the racist, Susan Hussey. It sounds like Harry actually has more work to do if he believes Hussey is the victim here. She was not. Ngozi Fulani was punished in every way possible for simply reporting an incident of racism within the palace.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, BP and Backgrid.

Prince Harry’s pretaped Good Morning America interview aired this morning, and hilariously, Harry keeps radiating joy. This man is so happy to speak on the record, he’s been waiting for this for years, to finally set the record straight, to speak his truths out in the open. Despite the Windsors’ need to make Harry sound like he’s dumb or damaged, what really comes across is that he’s a well-spoken man who has opened himself up to change and done a lot of work. He’s made mistakes (and he even makes mistakes in these interviews), but he owns that sh-t and acknowledges that he’s a work in progress. I enjoy his emphasis on how important it is to him to be able to write his story too. Here’s the GMA interview:

Prince Harry to @michaelstrahan on rift with his family: “What people don’t know is the efforts that I’ve gone to to resolve this privately, both with my brother and with my father.” https://t.co/3H8haerzWR pic.twitter.com/Fa45y4D3V4

— Good Morning America (@GMA) January 9, 2023

Some quotes:

On Kate vs. Meghan: “[The press] pitched the Waleses, which Kate and William are now, against the Sussexes, me and my wife. They always pitched us against each other. They pitched Kate and Meghan against each other.” When asked whether press reports of Kate and Meghan fighting disrupted the women’s relationship, Harry replied, “Without question.”

How Diana would feel about her sons’ split: “I think she would be heartbroken that it’s ended up where it’s ended up. I think she would be heartbroken about the fact that William, his office, were a part of these stories… William and I made a pact, made a deal that no matter what, we would never let our offices fight against each other.” Strahan: “You think he broke that pact?” Harry: “Yes. The people he employed broke that pact.”

They’re trying to destroy him: “The people that he employed broke that. But again, within the family, it’s hard because you are led to believe that if you don’t play the game, that you will be destroyed. And again, I’m the one who’s proving that that is true, right? Chose not to play the game, but they’re trying to destroy me.”

On Camilla: “I have a huge amount of compassion for her, you know, being the third person within my parents’ marriage. She had a reputation or an image to rehabilitate, and whatever conversations happened, whatever deals or trading was made right at the beginning, she was led to believe that that would be the best way to do it. And I don’t have a problem with any member of my family needing to rehabilitate their image, but if that rehabilitation or that relationship with, in this case, the British tabloids, comes at the cost of my girlfriend or my family — my close family or my larger family — then I draw a line at that.”

On family reconciliation: “If we can get to the point of reconciliation, that will have a ripple effect across the world. I genuinely believe that, and that’s kind of what is pushing me. And if that doesn’t happen, then that’s very sad.” Harry said he believes the British press continues to try to “drive a wedge” between him and William, but hopes that he can reconcile with his brother. “I hope that we will be joined at the hip again. Because, you know, if there’s something that will terrify the British press more than anything, it’s William and I being aligned.”

Security: “I was stunned that my family would allow security to be taken away, especially at the most vulnerable point for us. And maybe they didn’t understand the concerns that I had. I mean, I listed them. I laid them out.”

On his relationship with his grandmother: “My grandmother and I had a very good relationship… It was never a surprise to anybody, least of all, her. She knew what was going on, she knew how hard it was. She never said to me that she was angry. I think she was sad that it had got to that point.”

[From GMA]

He also takes ownership for his part in the breakdown in relations with his family, but that he has made significant efforts to make peace (peace with accountability). Harry emphasizes that there absolutely needs to be larger conversations within the family. As for what he says about Camilla… H is a shady B. “I have a huge amount of compassion for her, you know, being the third person within my parents’ marriage.” MY GOD.

“My wife is not visibly Black” – I mean… no comment. I know what he meant.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, GMA, Backgrid.

Prince Harry’s Spare could have been subtitled “How My Petty, Toxic, Jealous Brother Made My Life Hell Until I Broke Free.” That really seems to be the running theme of Harry’s memoir, how Prince William is a toxic a–hole who believed that Harry was his possession, his property, and William could bark orders at Harry throughout their lives. It’s also pretty clear that William was always jealous of Harry – jealous of Harry’s charities, jealous of Harry’s wife, jealous that the Queen seemed to prefer Harry. Speaking of, Harry’s includes a very interesting story about his beard. Harry started wearing a beard in his late 20s, following his second tour of Afghanistan. When his wedding day approached, Harry actually had to get special permission from QEII to keep his beard while marrying in uniform. QEII gave her permission, and William lost his pegging mind about it.

Prince Harry has reportedly claimed that Prince William was “livid” after the Duke of Sussex asked permission from the late Queen Elizabeth II to keep his beard for his 2018 wedding to Meghan Markle. In an excerpt from the royal’s forthcoming autobiography, the 38-year-old royal reportedly wrote that his grandmother gave him the “green light” to keep his facial hair for his televised nuptials to the Suits actress.

However, Harry alleged his older brother “bristled” at the notion and said Harry had put their grandmother in an “uncomfortable position.” During a conversation between the two, Harry reportedly told the Prince of Wales that “his opinion didn’t really matter” because the queen had already said he could keep his face unshaven.

“He raised his voice,” he wrote, adding that William said the queen “had no choice but to say yes” to Harry. The Spare author recalled finding his brother’s claim ridiculous, and told William that “she can speak for herself.”

Harry had speculated that his brother was angry about the beard because he thought the queen had a “soft spot” for the younger prince. While the late British monarch had decided her grandson could wear a beard during his wedding, the fight between the brothers allegedly continued over the phone for an entire week.

“At one point he actually ordered me, as the ‘heir’ speaking to the ‘spare,’ to shave,” Harry wrote. According to Page Six, Prince William allegedly confessed that he was “bitter” that he “wasn’t allowed” to keep his own “full beard” after returning home from a military assignment.

“He hated the idea of me enjoying a perk he’d been denied,” he wrote, adding that William wasn’t able to get married in a uniform of his own choosing while Harry was able to do so. “Finally, I told him flatly and defiantly that his bearded brother was getting married soon, and he could either get on board or not,” Harry said. “The choice was up to him.”

[From The Independent]

Imagine putting the Queen in an awkward position over keeping your beard for your wedding day, my God. “Harry’s beard disrespected the Queen!” No, the Queen cosigned the beard. “Harry’s beard puts the Queen in an awkward position!” No, it’s just a beard. “I DEMAND THAT YOU SHAVE YOUR BEARD, THIS IS THE HEIR SPEAKING.” Shut up, Baldemort. Besides, the rare times when William did have facial hair, he always looked awful. As soon as Harry grew his beard, it was like “oh, this is how he was always supposed to look.” If he ever shaved it, he would go back to looking so baby-faced.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, WENN.

Roya Nikkhah at the Times of London has become one of Prince William’s favorite sycophants, one of his go-to royal reporters for “his side.” Weirdly, it doesn’t feel like Kate feels the same way. Nikkhah famously did that stupid “The Other Brother” story, and Nikkhah’s new one has the same energy: pity poor Peg, he’s the real victim in all of this. This is Kensington Palace’s explicit message, and they’ve been briefed with William’s side, just as Harry said they would be. The headline is “William knows he’s a punchbag — he’s silent but burning inside.” Ah, so William is the “punchbag,” that’s weird because Harry wrote about how William violently assaulted him in Nottingham Cottage. Some highlights:

William’s deafening silence. As a close friend of both brothers explains, revenge is not how William rolls. “He won’t retaliate, he never would, because he’s dignified and unbelievably loyal. William is a sitting duck because Harry knows he isn’t going to retaliate. How many shots can you take at a sitting duck? It’s cruel, cowardly and so sad for William to keep taking the punches. He’s keeping quiet for the good of his family and the country.”

William is discussing Harry’s book with “only with his closest family and a small handful of friends”: William is hurting. “He’s anxious and he’s sad,” says the friend. “He’s concentrating on his wife and his children, that’s what he has. He has to focus on them, and look out for the rest of the royal family. He’s handling it so well on the outside — inside he’s burning.” Another friend says: “William will be going through a range of emotions — anger, concern and worry — not just for his family but how all this is going to affect the institution. He will be thinking strategically and grappling with the personal versus the institutional reaction. We know how closely he followed his grandmother’s example, and the institutional response may win the day over the personal. But he is staunchly protective of his own family, and he’s not just going to roll over.”

Kitty & Peg will be out this week: The Waleses will sail forth next week, resuming official duties after their Christmas break with a joint engagement. “His focus is on getting on with the job and his commitment to duty and service is unwavering,” says an aide. “We’d rather concentrate on the work we’re doing than on books or anything else that is happening.”

The long game, lmao: A friend of the royal family says: “William is tough, the family can play the long game in the way Harry and Meghan can’t. They can channel their inner Queen Elizabeth: show, don’t tell, demonstrate this is the role you’ve taken on with courage and decency. That’s a very powerful counterpoint to all this.”

The “fisticuffs” & a threat: While fisticuffs in the Nottingham Cottage kitchen in 2019 have long been known about in their tight-knit group, nobody thought Harry would go there. Why? Because of how much “sh-t” on Harry friends and family have kept under wraps for years, much of which has so far not emerged in the book’s leaked extracts. “I don’t know how you can do that to your brother, even if you don’t like or get on with him any more,” says a friend of the royal family. “William was always there to pick up the pieces for Harry, he was his mum [after Diana]. There’s so much stuff over the years that Harry has rung friends up about and said, ‘throw away that photo, promise you won’t speak about this’. You could have a f***ing field day with sh-t on Harry. So could William, who (in comparison) is as clean as a whistle. I can’t believe he’d stoop so low. It’s outrageously disloyal.”

Ah, they think Harry is stupid: “It’s strategically not clever. Harry is good at getting his narrative out there but we know so much, we’ve cleaned up so many messes over the years, there is so much we could say.” Several friends of Harry, once loyal to him, say they are considering whether to go on the record to debunk some of his claims as “bollocks” and drop counter-bombshells of their own. “Loyalty works both ways,” warns one.

They are so bonkers: “William would [want to reconcile] but how can he right now?” says a close friend. “Maybe once Harry has written a book about all the great work the royal family does.”

Charles won’t fly to Montecito: A source who knows the King well says: “The royal family has to avoid being vindictive but that doesn’t mean the King is going to fly out to Montecito to calm Harry down. They’ve got no alternative but to let the hurricane blow through.”

The coronation: Harry has cast his attendance at the coronation in doubt, but sources close to him believe he will return to the UK for the service at Westminster Abbey on May 6: “It is an important moment for Harry’s father and he would want to show his respect.” If Harry does make it, he might be relieved to learn that he will not be required to kneel and pledge allegiance to his father. In a major break with tradition, Charles has scrapped the act of the royal dukes kneeling to “pay homage” before touching the crown and kissing the monarch’s right cheek. William will be the only royal to perform the tradition. A well-placed source says: “As things stand, there is no role for Harry in the service.” Courtiers will breathe a sigh of relief. Royal photographers and body language experts will be devastated.

[From The Times]

The way Peg is doing this with a straight face, I cannot. “They can channel their inner Queen Elizabeth: show, don’t tell…” Literally all William does is tell and not show. William used his KP communications team to put together this piece which is, in summary: poor William, he’s so brave in the face of his disloyal, damaged brother telling his story, William would never go on the record like Harry. The way you can tell all of this is coming from William is the careful wording around his violent assault of Harry – William can’t deny it outright, so his “friends” say “how dare Harry report his assault, we have dirt on Harry!” Tyler Perry was 100% correct when he said Harry and Meghan were victims of abuse and the Windsors (namely William) were “batterers.”

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Instar, Cover Images, archived cover courtesy of the Sunday Times.