Bristol Palin was supposed to get married this holiday weekend. She was supposed to marry Dakota Meyer after a whirlwind courtship and engagement – reportedly, Bristol and Dakota met sometime late last year, got engaged in March and set the wedding date for May. It happened pretty fast – maybe too fast. Maybe it was so fast, Bristol only recently learned that Dakota had a brief starter marriage and his ex-wife has some issues about the way he treated her (and continues to treat her?). So, long story short, the wedding was canceled. We learned about that last week.

But there are still questions. What happened exactly? Did Bristol know about Dakota’s starter marriage? When did she know? Did Dakota learn something about the Palins? Was he too gun-happy around children? Did they call off the wedding because they were afraid of another Palin family brawl? One of the best questions was: why did Sarah Palin still insist that the two families were going to get together on the day of the now-canceled wedding to celebrate the couple? That question has particular importance because it looks like Bristol Palin didn’t even show up.

It looks like there was one very important person missing from Sarah Palin’s Memorial Day barbecue: daughter Bristol, who was supposed to get married this weekend. Bristol, 24, was set to wed U.S. Marine Dakota Meyer on Saturday but canceled the nuptials less than a week before the wedding was supposed to take place.

Onetime Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah, 51, told PEOPLE that the couple’s families would still gather at the would-be groom’s Kentucky farm – where the wedding was supposed to take place – to celebrate the holiday. But Bristol has been posting Instagrams of herself back home in Alaska.

[From People]

I’m including some of Bristol’s Instagrams below. She made sure people knew that she was nowhere near Kentucky, posting the photos with messages like “enjoying this beautiful weekend in AK.” She really wants to put the emphasis on the idea that she called off the wedding, that she wants no part of making it look like there are no hard feelings. It’s interesting. I would imagine there is A LOT more to this story besides “cold feet.” Oh, and there are Twitter photos from the BBQ and people are analyzing the heck out of one photo where it looks like Sarah Palin is yelling at Dakota – go here to see.

Here’s an interesting sidenote: the blonde woman in one of Bristol’s Alaska-roadtrip photos is Marina Lupas, described as an “exotic model/video vixen.” Um…

Photos courtesy of Instagram.

Mornings with @shantiombb

A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on May 10, 2015 at 10:51am PDT

Miley Cyrus adopted a Persian kitten a few weeks ago. She swiftly crafted the cat into an internet star, even going so far to create its own Instagram page. The page is authentic (not a fan imitation). Miley crossposts and links the cat’s account all the time from the official Miley account. Miley appears to be enamored with this cat, just like every other pet she’s owned.

Miley’s love for animals is one thing I do appreciate about her. But even I’m starting to realize that Miley’s a bit of an animal hoarder. She currently has several dogs and a pet pig. Miley only just sang a sad song for her dead blowfish. Over the past few years, Miley lost a few dogs, Floyd (allegedly to a coyote) and Lila (after one of Miley’s other dogs attacked her). Miley had enough sense to give away a bandaid puppy that her mom gave her after Floyd died. But Miley still keeps piling on the pets. Is she really able to care for all of them?

Here’s why I ask. This is a photo of the new Persian kitty right after Miley adopted it.

Break the Internet.

A photo posted by Shanti Om Bb (@shantiombb) on May 9, 2015 at 4:44pm PDT

Here’s the kitty a few days after adoption. There’s a crust accumulation forming below its tear ducts. Many Persian cats need their eyes cleaned on a daily basis. The breed’s unusual face shape causes a great deal of tearing and drainage. Daily cleaning clears away crust buildup and prevents infection. Even I (as a crazy dog lady) am aware of the simple cleaning process. Is Miley cleaning her Persian cat’s eyes at all? Her Instagram commenters keep warning her to do so, but the crust grows worse with each photo. You may not want to look any further. This poor cat.

It hurts to leave you.

A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on May 11, 2015 at 5:17pm PDT

Here’s the kitty about a week ago.

????In da studio with mama @mileycyrus ????

A photo posted by Shanti Om Bb (@shantiombb) on May 20, 2015 at 12:54am PDT

And here’s a photo from a few days ago.

When da squad wants you to go out but you already have plans….

A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on May 23, 2015 at 7:29pm PDT

Photos courtesy of Miley Cyrus on Instagram, Miley’s Cat on Instagram & WENN

View image | gettyimages.com

Last week I saw Laverne Cox give a speech at a university in Virginia. To say that she was incredible, funny and well spoken is an understatement. Laverne was so impressive, so well read and just compelling. I’m grateful to have been able to see her, and transgender activist and former Navy Seal Kristin Beck, in person recently. You feel like you’re in the presence of strength and bravery beyond anything you’ve experienced. I know that sounds like I’m blowing smoke, I’m not, I just can’t imagine having to go through the sh*t that these two women have experienced and to come out the other side giving life-changing speeches. That’s honestly how I felt after seeing Kristin and now Laverne, if they can do this then anything is possible.

Laverne discussed her upbringing in rural Alabama as a twin born to a single mother who worked as a teacher. She touched on a few points that she’s given in interviews in the past, so this recap will skip the details that are already known about her biography. (Watch her It Gets Better video for more. There’s no way I could do justice to everything she said, even if I included it here.) At the end of her speech, she took questions from the audience that left a lot of people in tears. Three different attendees knew transgender people and were sharing their stories and asking how to be more supportive. One woman revealed that her transgender friend had attempted suicide, and Laverne promised to record a message for him backstage. I’m tearing up just remembering it. Here’s some of what Laverne said. I was blown away that night. (Also, I typed this up on my iPad and she’s a quick talker so in some cases I’m paraphrasing.)

We should support gender self determination
“If we are serious about ending bullying, we have to support gender self determination.
Our lived experiences defy this conflation, this binary model. We are called on to police [each other’s gender] as individuals. Allow people to express their gender in ways that feel most authentic to them.”

She felt ashamed as a child
She quoted Brené Brown: “Shame is the intensely painful belief that one is unlovable, unworthy of connection and loving, guilt is ‘I did something wrong,’ shame is ‘I am wrong.‘”

She was sent to a therapist in 3rd grade
The therapist asked “Do you know the difference between a boy and a girl?” and she answered “there is no difference.” She assumed that there was doctor patient confidentiality, as she learned from television. However the doctor told everything to Laverne’s mother. When the doctor recommended testosterone shots, her mother discontinued the therapy. It took her mother a while to come around, but she now refers to her as her daughter and uses the correct pronouns.

She attempted suicide at the age of 11 after her grandmother passed
She swallowed a whole bottle of pills and woke up the next day with a stomach ache. More on Laverne’s suicide attempt.

She has a twin brother, a musician, who played her character, Sofia, on OITNB, before Sofia’s transition
Her brother doesn’t define himself as gay. He told her to describe him as “‘A practicing homosexual because the term gay is a white bourgeois concept.‘” Her brother “also identifies as negro goth and a true punk rock fan.” (More on Laverne’s brother here.)

She was part of the 90s NY club scene
“It was the first time in my life that my gender expression was looked on as something valuable.” She credited her friend Tina Sparkle as having changed her life. She also explained that she’s never done a drug in her life.

She’s experienced discrimination, bullying and scary situations
Laverne told of several situations where people would call out to her “that’s a man.” She said “Misgendering a transgender woman is an act of violence.” She finds it threatening and demeaning to be catcalled. In one incident in NY city, she got kicked and called slurs by a group of men and she retreated to a nearby store to call the police. She said that the police were very decent to her. She’s afraid every day but explained that she’s had it so much better than many transgender people.

She also talked about Islan Nettles, a 21 year-old transgender woman murdered in NY in 2013. A suspect has finally been arrested in Islan’s beating death. The statistics on murder and hate crimes against transgender people are heartbreaking.

She loves working on Orange Is The New Black
She is “so blown away by the power of these women, [they have a] mostly all female crew as well… it’s a wonderful atmosphere. The storyline for Sofia this season is just wonderful.” She called the cast “brilliant” and said that she’s learned a lot on set.

She was asked what Jenner’s transition means for the transgender community (this talk took place after both episodes of “About Bruce” had aired)
“Bruce is extremely sincere and there is no way, because of who Bruce is, to transition privately. I couldn’t imagine transitioning in the public eye…

“What the media is doing to it in terms of a spectacle is deeply disturbing to me.”* We should “try to get rid of the spectacle and make it about the humanity. These folks [The Kardashians] have taken on all of these ideas in the public imagination about being famous for no reason [but] at the end of the day they are human beings who love each other. There is a human piece, I wish this would happen privately… They have a sincere desire to change the world.”

In previous interviews, Laverne has revealed that she spoke to Jenner a few months back and said she found Jenner sincere, human, and very connected to their family. (I’m using the pronouns Laverne used, which are gender neutral.) She also had positive things to say about the Diane Sawyer special on Jenner’s transition. The thing is, it’s hard to separate out “the media spectacle,” from the Kardashian hype over Jenner’s transition, and how the family has capitalized on it. I understood what she was saying, though, that the media has taken it too far and has focused on the wrong things.

As for how we can support transgender people and others in general, Laverne said “We have to become more empathetic, we have to listen more, we have to let folks take the lead.” She also explained that the media “narrative has been around surgery [and] bodies.” We should “think about trans identity beyond our bodies” and instead focus on “hearts, souls, emotions and our experiences. That’s when we can go to the next level.”

She also talked about how, in the 90s, transgender people strove to blend in, but said there’s a growing movement to recognize transgender people as beautiful. She asked us to use the hashtag #transisbeautiful. After hearing Laverne and Kristin speak, I know that trans is so much more than that.

*Note that the title is a direct quote, she reiterated her point about the media spectacle in a later sentence, but it was redundant so I left it out of the recap.

View image | gettyimages.com

View image | gettyimages.com

photo credit: Getty, FameFlynet and me

The world felt a huge loss when B.B. King died at the age of 89 on May 15. He lived in Las Vegas and kept up a rigorous touring schedule until last year. King’s death came a few weeks after one of his daughters, Patty, spoke with TMZ about how she suspected elder abuse on behalf of her father’s manager, LaVerne Toney. The two had argued about whether King needed to be hospitalized after what turned out to be a minor heart attack. Toney had power of attorney over King, so Patty called the police in order to summon paramedics. Patty provided TMZ with a haunting photo that showed King in the hospital.

Patty hoped the photo would persuade authorities to help protect her father. She previously alleged that Toney (and his assistant) withheld B.B.’s medication and stole between $20-30 million from her father over the years. Sadly, B.B. King only lived a few more weeks. Patty and another one of King’s daughters, Karen, believe that Toney and his assistant poisoned King to death. Some excerpts from Hollywood Reporter:

Daughters Karen Williams and Patty King allege that family members were prevented from visiting while King’s business manager, LaVerne Toney, and his personal assistant, Myron Johnson, hastened their father’s death.

Toney is named in King’s will as executor of an estate that, according to court documents filed by lawyers for some of King’s heirs, could total tens of millions of dollars.

Johnson was at B.B. King’s bedside when he died May 14 in hospice care at home in Las Vegas at age 89. No family members were present.

“I believe my father was poisoned and that he was administered foreign substances,” Patty King and Williams say in identically worded sections of affidavits provided to The Associated Press by their lawyer, Larissa Drohobyczer. “I believe my father was murdered,” they say.

A week before King’s death, a judge in Las Vegas dismissed a request from Williams to take over as King’s guardian. An April 29 petition alleged that Toney had blocked King’s friends from visiting him and had put her family members on King’s payroll. It also alleged that large sums of money had disappeared from King’s bank accounts.

But Clark County Family Court Hearing Master Jon Norheim said on May 7 that police and social services investigations in October and April uncovered no reason to take power-of-attorney from Toney.

Williams, Patty King and another daughter — Rita Washington — vowed to keep fighting. “We lost the battle, but we haven’t lost the war,” Williams said then.

Drohobyczer said she represents Williams, Patty King and most of King’s nine other adult children and heirs. “The family is sticking together … to oust Ms. Toney based on her illegal conduct, conflicts of interest and self-dealing,” she said. She alleged that Toney hastened King’s death by “misconduct, or by failing to properly attend to his medical needs.”

An affidavit from Patty King, who used to live at King’s home, says she saw Johnson administer to King two drops of an unknown substance on his tongue during evenings for several months before his death, and that Toney never told her what the substance was.

[From Hollywood Reporter]

Conflicting reports have come out. A lawyer for King’s estate told the AP there is no active investigation in to King’s death. Attorney Brent Bryson says three different doctors concluded that King received proper care “up until the time he peacefully died in his sleep.” But Yahoo quotes a Nevada coroner’s office, which says Las Vegas police have officially launched a homicide investigation.

This story sounds so harrowing and scary. The day after King died, the coroner initially reported that the cause of death was a series of mini-strokes (related to type 2 diabetes). This past Sunday, an autopsy was performed on King’s body to determine his true cause of death. Results may take up to two months.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

View image | gettyimages.com

Last week, I gave a little preview of Scandinavian royal scandal attractions. Sweden’s Prince Carl Philip will marry fiancée Sofia Hellqvist on June 13th, and the whole thing is sort of a mess – go here to review. Some questioned my instance on the inappropriateness of Sofia as a royal bride, like I was “slut-shaming” an obvious free spirit and sex-positive role model. Well… I feel like that sort of loses the thread of why this union is so scandalous. Sofia has literally posed for p0rn magazines and she’s a thirsty reality star in the vein of, like, Courtney Stodden. And if there was nothing to be ashamed of, why is the Swedish royal family trying to whitewash Sofia to such an extent? But I digress. The wedding is going through. Soon she will be HRH Princess Sofia, Duchess of Värmland. Ahead of their wedding, Carl Philip and Sofia sat down for a joint interview on Swedish television. You can tell that everything has been orchestrated by the palace because Sofia wasn’t asked any questions about her past:

The royal wedding countdown is on! In just a few weeks, Prince Carl Philip of Sweden, one of Europe’s most beloved bachelors, will be off the market when he marries reality-TV star Sofia Hellqvist — and if the couple’s latest comments are anything to go by, we can expect to see quite the romantic display when they tie the knot on June 13.

“I feel extremely confident, stable and balanced when Sofia is by my side, and I’ve felt that way from the beginning,” Prince Carl Philip, 36, told Swedish channel TV4 in an interview to be aired just before the nuptials.

Former model and soon-to-be HRH Princess Sofia, Duchess of Värmland, sounds just as enamored. “Carl Philip is my best friend, the person I talk to the most,” the 30-year-old bride said. “He’s so smart and I feel so secure with him.”

The interview, which will air in Sweden on June 1 and 8, is the latest in the pre-wedding excitement. In April, Sofia enjoyed a bachelorette party with close friends like Crown Princess Victoria in a lavish mansion on the banks of Lake Mälaren, about an hour west of Stockholm. Then it was Prince Carl Philip’s turn in early May, when his friends “kidnapped” him for a surprise bachelor party in Greece.

[From Hello Magazine]

I’m surprised Crown Princess Victoria organized Sofia’s bachelorette party. My impression was that Victoria was not looking forward to welcoming Sofia into the family in any way, shape or form. As for all of this… is Carl Philip really “so smart”? I have my doubts. But it doesn’t matter THAT much: Victoria is the crown princess and it’s not like Carl Philip or Sofia will ever get near the throne.

Photos courtesy of Getty, WENN.

Elizabeth Banks covers the latest issue of The Edit, surprisingly NOT to promote Pitch Perfect 2. PP2 is already out and it’s already a massive hit, easily making $100 million-plus domestically in its first ten days of release. Banks gets so much credit for that too – she’s so badass!! Props to her and may this be the first of many directorial gigs. Anyway, Banks sat down with net-a-porter.com’s The Edit to promote her supporting part in Magic Mike: XXL. I didn’t realize it, but she’s playing a wild-and-crazy former stripper in the sequel. I bet she had a BLAST. Some highlights from the interview:

Her role in Magic Mike: “I play an ex-stripper. She’s a hot mess, she’s completely not me, which is great!”

Working with her husband Max Handelman on PP2: “Both Max and I have had to fight misconceptions. ‘She’s just a blond actress who works with her husband.’ ‘Who are they?’ ‘She’s not even that successful of an actress!’ But none of this is a vanity project. I want to tell stories and have more control over my life.”

Being a female director in Hollywood: “I don’t want to pretend it’s not what it is. You can’t not take up the cause the minute you accept the job. I made a funny movie – about girls – and it’s going to make money? It just doesn’t happen.”

Whether she has secret meetings with Lena Dunham & Angelina Jolie: “There’s no meeting because we’re all ****ing busy.”

Meeting her husband on the first day at University of Pennsylvania. “When I met Max. I was not like, ‘I just met my husband!’ I was 18; it was lust. He looked like Jason Priestley from Beverly Hills, 90210. I was like, ‘Oh, that’s a college boy. That’s what I’m interested in.’”

Motherhood: “Motherhood changed me in positive ways. It made me more ambitious for my kids. I do everything for them now, because I want this success for my life with them…Directing is a big decision. It’s a year and a half of my life and it’s taking my kids out of their daily routine.”

[From The Edit]

The Edit also says that Banks is rumored for an extremely juicy role: Billie Jean King in a feature bio-pic. Which would be AMAZING. Does anyone else remember the TV movie When Billie Beat Bobby? Holly Hunter starred as Billie Jean King in that and she was fantastic!! But I could see Banks doing a great Billie as well. God, I hope it happens! As for the rest of it… Banks is amazing. I keep saying this, but she’s so inspirational.

Photos courtesy of Chad Pitman/The Edit.

Even when I’m 90 I will still know every single word to this song. New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle, obviously. Substance! God, that album. For an entire year, I used to get ready to Thieves Like Us, pretending I was Molly Ringwald.

Anyway, Brandon Flowers (you didn’t think I would start the…      

Even when I’m 90 I will still know every single word to this song. New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle, obviously. Substance! God, that album. For an entire year, I used to get ready to Thieves Like Us, pretending I was Molly Ringwald.

Anyway, Brandon Flowers (you didn’t think I would start the…      

Even when I’m 90 I will still know every single word to this song. New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle, obviously. Substance! God, that album. For an entire year, I used to get ready to Thieves Like Us, pretending I was Molly Ringwald.

Anyway, Brandon Flowers (you didn’t think I would start the…      

Even when I’m 90 I will still know every single word to this song. New Order’s Bizarre Love Triangle, obviously. Substance! God, that album. For an entire year, I used to get ready to Thieves Like Us, pretending I was Molly Ringwald.

Anyway, Brandon Flowers (you didn’t think I would start the…