My mom is super-Southern and one of my favorite of her Southern-shade expressions is “Bless his baby heart.” You have to say it with a sarcastic twang. I keep hearing “Bless his baby heart” whenever I read new Kit Harington interviews. It’s not that he’s a bad guy – he’s not – or that he’s completely superficial or oblivious to the world. He’s just sort of naively self-absorbed in a somewhat charming way. He’s big on casual self-pity, like when he says he’s being “driven insane” by people asking about his hair. Anyway, it’s time for a new episode of “Celebitchy Presents: Kit Harington Says Words.” Sub-head: “Bless his baby heart.”

Kit on the idea of playing James Bond: ‘I’d love to play James Bond, who wouldn’t? I think it’s a little way off. There’s a perfectly good Bond there and lots of people lined up to play him again but, yeah, I’d definitely like to play Bond. Of course.’

It’s so hard to be photographed: “Whatever the project, whether I believe in it creatively or not, whether I am getting up at 5am for a 17-hour shoot, the acting never feels like work…It’s all this…This is the work. The selling of it. People taking pictures of you in the street as if you were a rare bird of prey. I understand when you’re in a big show and you look like you do, people want to show their mate on Instagram or whatever. But sometimes it feels like I’m a beautiful sunrise…or a dying dog.”

His politics: Harington says he was “fiercely socialist” as a teenager, but which way will he cast his vote? “My father was traditionally very Conservative and my mother very Labour, so previously I went Lib Dem, but I don’t know how I’ll vote this time. I feel somewhere between Labour, Green and Lib Dems. But I was sympathetic to the way Lib Dems behaved in government; they had to show the country that a coalition could work and stand up to the Tories. Although they did f–k people on tuition fees.”

He’s funny: “In my private life I like to think so. I’m not humourless. But perhaps it’s not a side that people see very often.”

His fame as Jon Snow: “But it does no good to wonder about what might have been. This is the path that was given me. Plus, I have a flat – the Flat That Thrones Bought. I’m incredibly lucky… Anyway, I accepted that I’ll most likely be remembered for Jon Snow a long time ago.”

[From Metro & The Guardian]

“But sometimes it feels like I’m a beautiful sunrise…or a dying dog…” Oh, Kit. How many dying dog Instagrams has he seen? For the love of God. The imagery that he evokes when describing himself is always pretty… special. I do love him. I hope he keeps talking. Someone at Game of Thrones might want to get him some media training classes though.

Anyway, JKH (Just Keep Hodoring).

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

Here are some more photos of Sofia Vergara and Joe Manganiello at the Met Gala on Monday. I think he came to NYC to be with Sofia during her publicity tour for Hot Pursuit, plus he wanted to escort her to the Met Gala. I think that’s their dynamic, at least I hope that’s their dynamic. I want to believe that Joe is very much a “You do what you want for your career and I’ll support you every step of the way” kind of guy. Unlike Sofia’s ex, Nick Loeb.

As we discussed last week, Nick Loeb wrote a New York Times op-ed about his lawsuit against Sofia. He wants custody of the two embryos they created together, because he believes “life begins at fertilization” and he wants to implant the embryos into a gestational carrier and raise the babies himself. Sofia is fine with the embryos remaining frozen. Loeb’s op-ed was particularly crazy, and seemed very much like an attempt to publicly manipulate and humiliate his ex-fiancée. Up until this point, Sofia has only released one official statement (her publicist has leaked a few tabloid stories though). But on Monday, Sofia appeared on the Howard Stern show and of course Stern asked her about everything. Here’s the audio – the Loeb stuff starts around the 38:30 mark. (Some minor NSFW language.)

Sofia said that didn’t read Loeb’s NYT op-ed, and when asked about Loeb’s lawsuit, she says it “makes no sense” and a child “needs a loving relationship of parents that get along, that don’t hate each other…I don’t hate him but he obviously has a problem with me! A kid needs parents. I wouldn’t imagine anyone saying that it’s sane to bring to the world kids that are already set up, everything wrong for them. It would be so selfish.”

When asked about the legal standing Loeb has, Sofia just sort of shrugs it off, saying, “There is law. You signed papers, legal papers, and if it was so serious for him, this issue – which I totally respect it is serious for someone – then you should have taken it more serious at the time like I did…there is a contract.” She explains it in more detail and says she isn’t worried about a judge siding with Loeb because their two contracts (they did it twice, after all) are completely valid.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

Here are some photos of Kim Kardashian on Tuesday in NYC, making an appearance at Barnes & Noble. She did a book signing – her book of selfies, Selfish, was released yesterday. Can we say a few words about her appearance? As some of you have noted in the comments, Kim seems to be borrowing her mother’s Botox-and-filler guy at this point. Either that or Kim has taken a photo of Kris Jenner’s current face into her plastic surgeon and Kim told the guy, “This is what I want to look like.” There’s simply no other explanation for why Kim and Kris’s faces are morphing into each other in the same, equally tweaked way. It’s actually pretty disturbing.

Also: I kind of believe Kim had some fresh butt (implant) work done recently. Between these photos and the Met Gala photos, it seems like her butt has been freshly Pinocchio’d.

As for the “meta” moment at Kim’s book signing… as I said, her new book is a book of selfies. Selfies she’s taken over the years. Sexy selfies, fashion selfies, glam selfies, cat-faced selfies, butt selfies, makeup selfies, ALL OF THE SELFIES. So here’s what’s funny: selfies were banned at her book signing. If you wanted to get a selfie with Kim while she was signing your book, you were out of luck.

I’m including a back view because seriously, she’s got some fresh Pinocchio Butt happening. And this skirt is an utter mess.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

It’s official. With the opening of Avengers: Age of Ultron, the Marvel Cinematic Universe is now the highest grossing franchise in movie history. So I guess Jeremy Renner decided he had nothing to lose when he visited Conan O’Brien to promote the film. To recap, Jeremy gleefully called Black Widow a “slut“ as Chris Evans laughed and added “wh*re!” Then Marvel made them both apologize. Jeremy said, “I am sorry that this tasteless joke about a fictional character offended anyone. It was not meant to be serious in any way. Just poking fun during an exhausting and tedious press tour.” A non apology.

Chris Evans went into hiding after the tour ended. Officially, he held a funeral for his beard and is preparing to shoot Cap 3: Civil War. But dude is terrified of saying something dumb again (as he should be). In contrast, Jeremy decided it was time to celebrate. He told Conan all about his little internet problem:

“It was a joke, off-color, whatever. I’m unapologetic about alot of things. Yeah, I got a lot of Internet trouble. I guess that’s the thing now … I was asked a question, ‘So Black Widow has been linked to Hawkeye, Iron Man, Bruce Banner and Captain America and so what do you think of that.’ I said sounds like she’s a slut. Mind you I was talking about a fictional character and fictional behavior. But if you slept with four of the six Avengers, no matter how much fun you had, you’d be a slut. Just saying. I’d be a slut. Just saying.”

[From Team Coco on YouTube]

Conan and his audience laughed along with Jeremy’s story, which sucks. The sad part about this whole mess is that Jeremy still thinks he said nothing wrong. He truly believes that any guy who slept with four Avengers would be called a slut, which isn’t true. Tony Stark has quite the reputation, but he gets labeled as a “billionaire playboy philanthropist,” which sounds much more respectful than “slut.” Guess what? Black Widow isn’t even sleeping around in these Marvel movies! She kissed a few of these guys and mentioned Budapest when talking to Hawkeye, so of course Renner thinks she’s sleeping with everyone. Not that it matters. She could sleep with every Avenger, and Renner still shouldn’t judge.

People are saying that Renner’s only peeved with the situation because no one wants to sleep with Hawkeye. It’s funny, but only because Renner is behaving so unapologetically. Here’s the Conan clip.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & WENN

Over the past few months, I’ve become a fan of Jaden Smith. I followed his Twitter page and enjoyed his stream of consciousness entries. So I was sad to see that he deleted the entire account. Jaden also deleted his Facebook page and put a padlock on his Instagram account. All of this comes from a 16-year-old boy who’s simply trying to be a kid. I’m surprised that he’s shut himself off, seeing as his age group (and most others) are hooked on social media.

Jaden’s been looking much happier than usual this year, often breaking into spontaneous dance at Coachella and movie premieres. He’s also had a grand time swerving too hard in skirts. Some people believed Jaden was looking for attention, but apparently, he’s tired of the attention.

In memoriam, here are some of my favorite gems from Jaden. Some are a few years old:

* “Haters Are Just Pre Creators Who Need The Seed Of Greatness.”

* “‘Hey Are You Jaden Can I Have A Picture With You’ No Cause I’m Super Sad But We Can Sit And Talk.”

* “How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren’t Real”

* “The Great Gatsby is One of the Greatest Movies Of All Time, Coachella.”

* “Anything You See In Any Magazine Ever Is Fake.

* “Every 7 Years Your Body Is Completely Replaced With Entirely New Cells So Just Because You Look The Same Doesn’t Mean You Are.”

* I Don’t Want You Guys To Think Because I Was Born In America That I Speak And Abide By English Grammar. I Speak Jaden, Indefinitely.”

* “Omg I’m Bout To Tweet The Most Jaden Smith Thing Ever Ready?”

[From Jaden Smith on Twitter]

See, he’s completely harmless and very funny. I do hope everything is okay with Jaden. Social media (and Twitter in particular) can be a haven for abuse. Death threats towards celebrities are not unheard of. Jaden seemed to enjoy Twitter a lot. He once promised to “imprint myself on everything in this world” which will be harder to accomplish offline. Perhaps Jaden’s simply taking a break, and he’ll return when he has something to promote.

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News, Fame/Flynet & WENN

There are so many royal stories knocking around this week, it’s hard to keep up. Most of them are utterly random, like some psychic claiming that Duchess Kate and Prince William’s newborn baby daughter, Princess Charlotte of Cambridge, will of course be JUST LIKE Princess Diana. But some of the stories are actually interesting and noteworthy. Let’s discuss!

First off, Queen Elizabeth finally got to meet her newest great-granddaughter yesterday. The Queen had been staying at Sandringham over the weekend and she didn’t get back into London until Tuesday. She immediately stopped by Kensington Palace to see Princess Charlotte. There was talk that William didn’t want to release Charlotte’s name until the Queen saw Charlotte in person. But I guess someone told him that he was being ridiculous.

E! News had a fawning piece on how William and Kate will raise their kids to be “normal” and how a big part of that will be moving full-time to Anmer Hall because Kensington Palace is just SO claustrophobic, especially after the multi-million-dollar renovation. I don’t know, you guys. How “normal” is life going to be for these kids if they’ve moved to a grand country mansion because their parents’ palace was too claustrophobic?

On Tuesday, @KensingtonRoyal released a copy of the official birth certificate or baby registration or whatever it’s called in the UK. I’m including the tweet below. I could honestly analyze this document forever. William’s handwriting! His signature is crazy – it’s looks like he just signs official documents “Will [swoop].” Again, he cites Kate’s occupation as “Princess of the United Kingdom.” Best job description ever, right? And why isn’t Prince William’s occupation listed as “air ambulance pilot”???

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have formally registered the birth of Princess Charlotte pic.twitter.com/nY2hUxaEKi

— Kensington Palace (@KensingtonRoyal) May 5, 2015

Last thing – by all accounts, Kate did not have an epidural or any kind of drugs during the birth. Sources claim that Kate and the midwives did all the work and the doctors were just there to “supervise.” The labor went by really quickly, about two hours, and everyone was surprised by how quickly it was over and how well Kate did. Reportedly, Kate didn’t do an epidural with Prince George too. Props to her. No shade!

Photos courtesy of WENN.

The Avengers: Age of Ultron made crazy money on its opening weekend, which surprised no one. Even with the frankly messy and offensive implosion of many of the Avenger actors during the publicity tour, the film was always going to make a ton of money. But some of backlash surprised even me. I kept reading, on site after site, that Marvel wasn’t pushing any Black Widow merchandise. You want an Ironman action figure? Sure. You want Thor? Sure. But Black Widow – the only female Avenger – doesn’t have any merchandise. Once people actually saw the film, there was also a lot of criticism about how Black Widow’s characterization throughout the film, that she’s ornamental, that she’s there to serve the men, etc.

Who should be blamed for all of this? I’d blame Kevin Feige and the rest of the Marvel executives before I’d even get to blaming writer/director Joss Whedon. But Whedon has ended up taking a lot of the blame, especially online. Apparently, people were yelling at him on Twitter all weekend and then on Monday, he decided to just delete his Twitter.

Joss Whedon and Twitter have broken up, everybody. But it’s going to be okay. These things happen, and it’s not because of something you did. The Avengers: Age of Ultron filmmaker and this particular form social media just decided they would be happier apart, and it doesn’t mean Whedon or Twitter love you any less.

The conscious uncoupling happened at some point on Monday, following the $191.3 million opening weekend of Age of Ultron, which collected the second-highest grossing three-day debut in history. (After only the $207 million opening of Whedon’s original Avengers in 2012.)

UPDATE: Whedon’s departure did create a wave of speculation on Twitter that he closed his account because of “death threats.” A search of tweets directed at him over the past week definitely turned up some deep ugliness, with some of the abusive users urging him to “die” or “commit suicide” over plot points they didn’t like in the movie. Although these comments are clearly disturbing, there was no unifying complaint or groundswell of attack beyond just the random (but all-too-typical) viciousness of anonymous social media trolls.

[From Entertainment Weekly]

The Daily Beast believes – I think correctly – that Whedon hated the fact that so many fans were blaming him for the way Black Widow was handled specifically, and how Marvel didn’t seem to want to put any money in marketing their films to girls. And let’s be fair to Whedon – I really think Age of Ultron got away from him. As in, Marvel corporate took away some of Whedon’s control, and they didn’t listen to him when he was like “we need to do more with Black Widow” and “you guys, this is such a sausage party” and “where’s the Black Widow merch?”

Also – the AV Club had a great write-up about all of the in-fighting between Whedon and Marvel corporate about certain scenes and storylines in Age of Ultron. Go here to read. My takeaway? Whedon just needs a break. That’s why he deleted his Twitter. He just wanted some peace and quiet without all of the Marvel insanity.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Zooey Deschanel’s cleavage on this Cosmopolitan cover though… I mean, WOW. I had no idea she was that busty. I guess that’s the good thing about pregnancy, right? Either that or Cosmo used some Photoshop magic to give her Barbie-doll-chest. Zooey covers the June issue of Cosmo, and she ends up discussing some hot-button issues, like whether she’ll do a photoshoot in a bikini after she has her baby, whether women are funny and whether we should #AskHerMore on the red carpet. Some highlights:

On achieving success: “I’m very focused. I work all the time, but I do what I love and I don’t care what people think of it. You don’t become successful by trying to be ‘a success.’ You become successful by doing things that give you pleasure. That’s a hallmark of mine.”

On not posing for a “body after baby” tabloid photo shoot: “Haven’t we all seen those pictures of a sexy new mom in a bikini after one month? I will not be that person. I’ve always gone my own course and never been someone who had the need to be super skinny. I like a healthy look. I don’t buy into that skinny-is-better mentality. I just eat healthy and work out and don’t worry about my weight too much. Actresses aren’t models, and most of them never wanted to be.”

On women in television: “It’s a good time for women on TV. We can be funny in our own way…and funny doesn’t mean just one thing. Funny isn’t just one-liners. It’s big personalities and individualism.”

On the #AskHerMore Twitter campaign during Awards season: “I’m all for people asking actresses more intelligent questions. Just because you’re wearing a nice dress doesn’t mean you don’t have any ideas. It’s a shame to reduce smart, talented women to clothes models. But you can be a feminist and femmy. I don’t see how those things contradict each other.”

[From Cosmopolitan]

At this point, I feel like I’ve ranted about #AskHerMore about a million times. If you’d like to read one of my month-old rants about it, go here. I have no problem with telling red carpet journalists that they should ask “important” questions to the ladies, in addition to asking them what they’re wearing. But I hate this Pollyanna act from some actresses, like the red carpet isn’t a multi-billion dollar industry, like they aren’t getting thousands of dollars in freebies with the understanding that they say a few sentences about the designer, the jewelry and the shoes. I hate this idea that red carpet show viewers need to listen to actresses talking about “the issues” or “their craft” rather a quick “Who are you wearing? Are you having fun? Is your mom your date tonight?” And I don’t see how a love of fashion and a love of red carpet shows is un-feminist either.

Photos courtesy of Yu Tsai/Cosmopolitan.

Expectant mama Ashlee Simpson stepped out with Evan Ross on Tuesday (May 5) in Van Nuys, Calif.

The mom-to-be looked beautiful in a blue maxi maternity dress while leaving the DMV with her husband.

Over the weekend, we spotted the parents-to-be shopping at Topanga Mall in Canoga Park.

This will be the first child – a girl – for Ashlee and her husband, 26, whom she wed on Aug. 30, 2014.

She is already mom to 6-year-old son Bronx with ex-husband, Fall Out Boy rocker Pete Wentz.

View Slideshow »»

View All Photos »»

Mom-to-be Zooey Deschanel covers the June issue of Cosmopolitan and opens up about expecting her first child with fiancé Jacob Pechenik this summer, women in television, and healthy body image.

On not posing for a “body after baby” photo shoot: “Haven’t we all seen those pictures of a sexy new mom in a bikini after one month? I will not be that person. I’ve always gone my own course and never been someone who had the need to be super skinny. I like a healthy look. I don’t buy into that skinny-is-better mentality. I just eat healthy and work out and don’t worry about my weight too much. Actresses aren’t models, and most of them never wanted to be.”

On women in television: “It’s a good time for women on TV. We can be funny in our own way … and funny doesn’t mean just one thing. Funny isn’t just one-liners. It’s big personalities and individualism.”

On the #AskHerMore Twitter campaign during awards season: “I’m all for people asking actresses more intelligent questions. Just because you’re wearing a nice dress doesn’t mean you don’t have any ideas. It’s a shame to reduce smart, talented women to clothes models. But you can be a feminist and femme. I don’t see how those things contradict each other.”

For more from Zooey, go to Cosmopolitan…