Another day, another rant about Marchesa. Three ladies chose to wear Marchesa to the Met Gala, and I hope they’re all regretting that decision. Let’s start with Sofia Vergara. Here’s what I don’t understand: if you’re not going to do anything with the theme, at least wear an interesting dress or a pretty dress or something incredibly flattering. Sofia’s Marchesa is ill-fitting, unflattering and flat-out cheap-looking. This looks like a wedding dress from 1995.

I actually think the idea behind Poppy Delevingne’s Marchesa was on-point. Deep red and black, an explosion of poppies for the top with an elegant full skirt. But the execution leaves something to be desired. Am I hallucinating or do the poppies not match the skirt? It seems like the red of the poppies are a few shades lighter than the skirt. Plus, everything just looks cheap. Like a child’s art project.

And here’s Ellie Goulding in Marchesa. I could see wearing this to a music awards show. But the Met Gala? Eh. I don’t know if there are any Goulding-loonies out there, but I think everything about Ellie is pretty overrated.

And here’s Sofia’s costar Reese Witherspoon in Jason Wu. This dress doesn’t have anything to do with the theme, but it’s a pretty/boring dress by a Chinese-American designer, so I guess that works. I think everything about this is “safe.” Of course, I wasn’t expecting Reese to wear a crazy flame headpiece, but she could have mixed it up a little bit more. This just looks like what she would wear to an awards show.

Photos courtesy of Getty, WENN.

What did I say yesterday when I wrote about FKA twigs and Robert Pattinson making their red carpet debut at the MET Gala? I said I wanted her to go rogue. Well, she wore a Christopher Kane dress with a dick at the slit. That’ll do.

When I was in London a couple of weeks ago, Lorella and I wen…      

You know I love Emily Blunt. And you further know Emily Blunt can take a fashion risk.

Well….

I wrote that sentence, and then I found myself in the position of having to back it up, and actually there isn’t that much. Like, she wore a bright green gown to the SAGs a few years back, and…      

Jennifer Lawrence wore Dior to co-host the Met Gala last night. At this point, I feel like Dior is playing JLaw hard. They usually put her in their worst designs, and she probably knows it. This relationship is strictly one of convenience for her. Jennifer doesn’t like to be bothered with styling decisions, which is fine. She’s not a fashion girl, and the industry treats her like one. Last night’s selection tried to fit the theme with a floral top stacked on top of a plain black skirt. The runway version had a shorter skirt that was pretty cute. They fancied-up the outfit for a gala, which translated into a matronly effect. The bib is perplexing. JLaw has new hair extensions now, and her spray tan has faded a bit, but her makeup is too cutesy.

Olivia Munn‘s J.Mendel gown had a weird ombre effect that reminded me of a Rocket Pop. With the halter neck and belly cutout, this dress is one big miss.

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley‘s body never stops. This Versace gown impeccably fits her figure. She looks gorgeous, especially from the back. A bolder color would have been more fun though.

Uma Thurman decided to wear a Grecian toga-inspired white Versace gown. The one-sleeved detail is confusing and possibly an attempt to fit the theme.

Hannah Davis wore a strappy J. Mendel dress that’s notable for color only. SI: Swim models rarely make a splash at the Met gala. She accessorized with Derek Jeter.

Karlie Kloss didn’t dress for the event. Her black Versace is serviceable but nothing special.

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Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & Getty

Of all the nearly-naked women on the Met Gala red carpet, I actually think Jennifer Lopez did it best. Kim Kardashian and Beyonce’s gowns weren’t on-theme, and they just seemed needlessly exhibitionist. At least J.Lo’s Versace gown was red, and she styled it with an eye towards keeping it in-theme. Is it still over the top? Of course. But I’m a ‘90s Girl, and I’ll always love it when Jennifer goes old-school and wears Versace.

Wendi Deng (formerly Wendi Murdoch) was one of the co-chairs of the event. She wore this blue Oscar de la Renta which… it’s okay. I probably would have liked it more on another woman. Wendi sort of cheapens it, right?

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Lorde got to wear a custom Calvin Klein dress – she was one of only a handful of Calvin Klein-clad ladies, along with Kendall Jenner and Rose Byrne. I really like Lorde and I think this dress suits her personality. And after so much nudity on the red carpet, it’s refreshing to see a young woman covered up like this. She stood out because she wasn’t exposing herself.

And here’s Rose Byrne (and Bobby Cannavale) in Calvin Klein. I like this a lot too – it’s Chinese-themed, but deconstructed.

Photos courtesy of Getty, WENN.

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Julianne Moore wears a lot of Tom Ford, who tends to put her in matronly, unflattering looks. So at least she didn’t wear Ford to the Met Gala and switched it up somewhat in black Givenchy. She was accompanied by their creative director Riccardo Tisci, Kanye West’s BFF and the man responsible for Kim Kardashian’s 2013 floral couch dress. This year, Tisci wasn’t quite as passive aggressive with his muse. Her black gown had a classic shape with some contemporary details, like small diamond cutouts along the bodice and sequin fringe across the bustline. Something nice: Moore looks lovely. However she could have looked so much better. This looks like a gown for a lesser awards ceremony, not the Met Gala. At least it’s not actively awful.

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Jessica Chastain was in a custom gold Givenchy gown that made her look like a classic screen siren. I love her hair, makeup and that incredible gown. I can only imagine the amount of work that went into making it. It would have been nice to see more of the China theme, but Chastain gets a pass for otherwise looking like perfection. This is one of the best looks I’ve ever seen on her.

Dianna Agron was similarly impressive in a white Tory Burch one shoulder gown featuring crane applique along the skirt. This was a smart way to incorporate the theme in that Cranes are central to Chinese mythology. She had understated styling and let the dress stand out. This is a win for Dianna.

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Here is Tory with the other two ladies whom she designed for, Maggie Q and Melanie Laurent. They all look incredible while subtly incorporating the theme. I’m a new fan.

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Look at Maggie Q working that sideview with her fiance, Dylan McDermott. Look at how sympatico they are.

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photo credit: WENN.com and Getty Images

This post is for all of the Met Gala ladies who wore Chanel. And it was a mess. Karl Lagerfeld didn’t bother to come to the Met Gala this year – he scheduled a notable conflict (his Resort show in Seoul, South Korea) for the same day as the Met Gala just so he wouldn’t have to come. But in his absence, several big-name celebrities decided to wear Chanel, to mostly mixed results.

Dakota Johnson completely ignored the Chinese theme and just went with a sparkly mini-dress. I actually thought she looked a lot like Kristen Stewart in these photos, only Dakota’s hair will ALWAYS be the pits, whereas Kristen’s hair is often pretty great. I thought Dakota might have gotten a shaggy, unkempt bob just for the Met Gala, but this haircut happened at least a week ago. As for the dress… I’m not into it. I like the fact that she edited the look way down, but it seems too undone for me.

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Diane Kruger wore a Chanel ensemble from the Spring 2011 line. I would have liked this better sans pants, with just a few more inches on the tube-dress part. That would have been amazing.

Rachel Weisz in a completely boring strapless Chanel. It has nothing to do with China AND it’s completely un-noteworthy. Plus, Rachel didn’t bring Daniel Craig! If you’re going to wear a boring dress, at least bring your hot, pouty husband.

Anna Wintour wore this custom-made Chanel. The Chinese influence is the poppy. It’s a bolder look from Wintour. I kind of love it.

I think Lily Collins kept with the theme in an interesting way, and while I can see objectively why this is a strong showing for her, I’m just not that into the whole look.

Photos courtesy of Getty, WENN.

It’s Versace. But it could also have been Zuhair Murad. What’s the difference? Beading held together by pantyhose – who can tell it apart? Doesn’t matter if there’s a dragon because f-ck, I’m so over it. I’m so over JLO in these kinds of dresses. I’m so over “body-con” as a substitute for imagina…      

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Rihanna launched a dozen memes last night with her (always) fashionably late arrival at the Met Gala. This massive gown, from Chinese designer Guo Pei, required three people to carry up the stairs. People have compared it to Belle from Beauty and the Beast and an extra-large pizza. Rihanna’s been really big on ginormous statement dresses lately, and I love that she hasn’t let her Dior contract tie her down at every event. With that said, this is one heck of a dress. The bright-yellow color, the endless folds of fabric, the unending train — it’s all perfect for this year’s Met Gala theme. Rihanna knows people watch what she wears, and she worked this opportunity well. She styled the dress well with a statement necklace, an ornate gold headpiece, and an offbeat, flipped hairdo.

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Rita Ora wore Tom Ford because of course she did. Rita occupies the same spot on Tom’s arm that Rihanna used to enjoy, and I think Rih’s fine with it. She’s moved on. This lush red dress is surprisingly low-key for such a big event. The fabric is gorgeous, and Tom’s people did a good job on tailoring. The collar is a little bit Dracula, but Rita pulls it off.

Selena Gomez wore a custom Vera Wang gown with tassel detail. It looked elegant from the back. The front view looks awkward because the belly cutout is unnecessary.

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Gabrielle Union played it safe (and ignored the theme) in this Zac Posen dress. Meh.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & Getty

If you’d have asked me who I would have predicted to pull out the ching-chong eyes before the MET Gala, I would have told you Katy Perry. Dakota Johnson would not have been on my radar. Maybe it’s because I’m so surprised that Katy wasn’t offensive that I’m not totally offended by her outfit. She…