This feels nostalgic, to be posting about Ana de Armas, even though so much has changed. Last March though, seems like we were posting about her on a daily basis, when she and Ben Affleck were in lockdown together and going for dog walks and coffee runs.  That was 2020. Ana’s kept a much lower profi…

Carole Middleton gave an interview to Good Housekeeping UK back in January, apparently. How was she to know that the cover and cover interview would come out in the middle of a particularly toxic royal media cycle? So she called up several media outlets to let them know that she, the Queen of the nation, would not bother to promote this magazine cover. And if that announcement happened to draw more attention to her Good Housekeeping cover, well, how was she to know? Poor Carole, so dignified and regal, she never puts a foot wrong! Good Housekeeping released some excerpts from the interview too:

What a typical day looks like at her company, Party Pieces. “The business has a CEO now, so I have the luxury of being able to focus on new ideas and how to grow, which is always an enjoyable challenge. We’re currently working on the very first range of Party Pieces own-brand tableware for children’s parties, and that is a real passion project. I’m still hands-on and love going to our warehouse and seeing where the orders are going. I have a wonderful team of people, some of whom have stayed with me since the early days.”

Life as a grandmother: As a grandmother to the children of daughters Catherine and Pippa, Carole describes herself as ‘hands on’. “I want to run down the hills, climb the trees and go through the tunnel at the playground,” she says. “As long as I am able to, that’s what I’ll be doing. I cook with them, I muck around dancing, we go on bike rides.”

Her work ethic: “I’m not someone to sit on the sofa for a long time. I have a lot of energy and enjoy my work. I grew up watching my parents, who both worked extremely hard. My father was a builder, and my mother worked part-time in a jewellery shop and later, would go to work in a factory. I remember them working hard to make ends meet and give us a lifestyle.”

[From Good Housekeeping UK]

The truth is, the devil works hard but Carole works harder. That’s always been the case – she not only ran a successful business for decades, she also raised three kids and, like an anxious mother out of a Jane Austen novel, she pushed her local Bucklebury beauties into the highest echelons of British society in an attempt to make “smart matches” for all of them. Being a social climber who is trying to throw her daughters in the paths of eligible, titled, rich men is a full-time occupation all on its own. The fact that she was running a business at the same time is crazy! Anyway, she’s the Kris Jenner of Britain and I’m actually saying that with respect. I just wish Carole’s kids had inherited her work ethic.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, WENN.

The way the Duke and Duchess of Sussex exposed – nay, ethered – the Windsor klan will be studied for years. Much like Princess Diana’s famous Martin Bashir interview exposed the facade of the fairytale royal marriage, the Sussexes have exposed (in their own way) so much of the incompetence, racism and clownery of ALL of the palaces, all of the royal courts. I’m also curious about the fact that it feels like Harry insinuated that the Queen is no longer in charge, that Charles is the de facto regent, that his relationship with his grandmother is fine and it’s only the people around her who do the real damage. With that in mind, Us Weekly has a story about how the Queen has been working nonstop to repair the damage in the wake of the Oprah interview.

A royal mess. Queen Elizabeth II has not stopped working to repair her family’s name after Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s explosive tell-all interview. “She has barely had any time to herself since the interview and has been in constant crisis meetings,” a source exclusively reveals in the new issue of Us Weekly.

While the monarch, 94, has not watched the March 7 special, according to the source, Buckingham Palace aides “thoroughly briefed” her on the claims that Harry, 36, and Meghan, 39, made about the royal family.

“The queen has always had a soft spot for Harry and looked out for him, so [she] is incredibly hurt and shocked that it has come to this,” the source tells Us. “She’s trying to be understanding and see things from Harry’s perspective, but the allegations he and Meghan have made are hard for her to digest. The interview has wreaked havoc on the royal family.”

[From Us Weekly]

“The allegations he and Meghan have made are hard for her to digest…” Eh. Again, I have my doubts about how much awareness Liz had pre-interview, and she doesn’t seem particularly broken up about it post-interview. There were claims that she would assume the role of Sherlock Petty and speak to William and Charles about racism, but I actually think the story about hiring an outside law firm is the biggest signal that Liz wants all of this off her plate. She wants Charles and William to clean up their own mess and she actually does NOT want her grandson Harry to be smeared to kingdom come. But we’ll see if she actually follows through on any of that.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid and WENN.

Kylie Jenner is a billionaire or close to being a billionaire. She’s made her money from her Kylie Cosmetics empire and from her own ability to mine a somewhat niche market. Kylie works with various makeup artists to create her Instagram ad campaigns to promote all of her products, and one of those makeup artists is named Samuel Rauda. Rauda was in a car accident and he has some kind of major head injury. He needed a life-saving brain surgery and so someone in the Rauda family created a GoFundMe page to get to $120K to help pay for Rauda’s medical bills. Kylie… donated $5,000. And she encouraged her followers to donate. That isn’t going over too well.

Kylie Jenner sparked outrage on Twitter over the weekend after encouraging fans to contribute to an online fundraiser for celebrity makeup artist Samuel Rauda, who was involved in a serious incident and underwent surgery last week.

Jenner, 23, who has worked with Rauda, had recently promoted a GoFundMe page dedicated to funding his medical expenses on her Instagram story, telling her 222 million followers: “Swipe up to visit his families [sic] go fund me,” according to The Sun. The request didn’t sit well with fans, who noted Jenner could have potentially funded the costs as she has an estimated net worth of just under $900 million.

“Why is kylie jenner asking for donations to fund her makeup artist’s surgery when she’s a billionaire,” one user tweeted.

“If I was as rich as Kylie Jenner I simply wouldn’t ask ppl on the internet to donate for my best friend’s brain surgery but we all built different i guess!” another posted.

“How come Kylie Jenner isn’t paying her makeup artist enough to afford a 60k surgery? That’s the real question. Her business is makeup. He’s her makeup artist! He’s not bringing in millions?!?” one wrote.

Earlier this week, a GoFundMe page was set up to help cover Rauda’s medical expenses. Under a list of top donations, a “kylie jenner” appeared to donate $5,000. As of Sunday, over $97,000 has been raised with a goal of $120,000.

“We would like to extend our most sincere thanks to each and everyone who has donated or sent prayers in support of Samuel,” organizer Johanna Portillo posted to the page Saturday. “We have felt the love and know that your continued prayers for healing are very much appreciated. It has been uplifting to witness how Sam not only brought a ray of shine to our lives but to many across the world. It has been a week since Sam’s accident. It has not been easy. In the midst of it all, Sam continues to fight, showing us how strong he truly is. Please continue to send prayers his way,” she continued.

Amid Sunday’s backlash, some defended Jenner online.

“She didn’t organize the gofundme page, it was published by Johanna Portillo 5 days ago. + the goal is $120,000 & she made a donation on Day 2 when she found out about the gofundme page probably. The fact that she donated something is important. Dnt write her off,” one user posted.

[From Page Six]

I mean… would it have looked better if Kylie had just donated the full $120K? Sure. Would it have looked better if she had donated more than $5K? Sure. Do we even know whether Kylie was even that close to Rauda? No, we don’t. So… yeah. Tone deaf, absolutely. But I also think… you know, she could have just said nothing and donated nothing too. That seems to be what most of Rauda’s clients were doing, you know?

Embed from Getty Images

Photos courtesy of Kylie’s IG and Getty.

Anna! Happy Birthday! I’m sorry you’re not able to celebrate this milestone with the blowout that you deserve so for the year ahead, I wish you: much more BTS and so much more great Korean entertainment content. Sounds like the dramas are getting you through a lot of f-cksh-t. Same, same. If you don…

The Mail on Sunday published a few different versions of the same article, which is “The Queen is not a puppet! Her Majesty has never been more in charge or more ready to be ruthless after Harry and Meghan’s claim that ‘men in suits’ run the monarchy, say sources.” If there’s one thing which will convince people that the Queen is in charge, it’s a rash of unnamed palace sources describing the Queen’s days full of card-playing in a decrepit castle while she assigns her most racist grandson to act as a “gatekeeper” to the all-white institution. This piece was so melodramatic and nonsensical, it’s pretty clear that the Windsor klan and the tabloid media share the same trait: they’ve both fully lost the plot and everyone is panicking. Some highlights:

Philip is fine: Prince Philip, less than 100 days shy of his 100th birthday, is said to be in good spirits. Yet for all the outward calm, something profound has changed at Windsor – and decisively so.

The Windsors think it’s bad form to speak of Philip’s death: How must the Windsors have felt to learn that part of the deal to screen the Oprah interview involved an agreement that it would be pulled from the schedules in the sad event of Prince Philip’s death. Perhaps this is considered good PR in California. In Windsor, they are simply baffled.

Oh wait, here are the Windsors talking about Philip’s death: Incidentally, a well-placed source has told The Mail on Sunday that the ever-practical Philip has long made his future wishes clear. When the time comes – which all hope will be some way off – there should be a ‘no-fuss’ funeral. One source said: ‘Philip has told the Queen that he should just be driven off to the Chapel in Windsor in the back of a Land Rover. No fanfare. No fuss.’ There is likely to be plenty more fuss emanating from the Sussexes’ £11 million Montecito mansion, however.

The Sussexes destabilised the Royal machine. Prince Charles had been targeted. William had been criticised. His wife had been given a verbal mauling. With the Royal Family under siege from Harry’s Hollywood howitzers – so blatant that one Royal watcher described them as ‘tantamount to treason’ – retribution had to be sharp and very public.

The servants are restless? While it is the Royal Family’s duty to remain calm, the tense mood in the Green Drawing Room at Windsor Castle has been noted below stairs, with Palace servants unsettled by the family ructions and allegations against loyal staff. As one insider said: ‘The place feels like a crumbling mansion – with no one in charge of the housekeeping.’ With the institution of the Monarchy under attack from 24-hour US news channels, there has been bombshell after bombshell.

William the Gatekeeper: Interestingly, but perhaps unsurprisingly, the [Sussex] episode has given renewed prominence to Prince William, who has played an important role in helping the Palace hold the line. Like the Queen, his response has been deeply personal. As a future King, he could hardly keep silent when asked about the racism allegations, replying during a visit to a London school: ‘We are very much not a racist family.’ Those who have worked with both William and his father say that William is more likely to address something head-on. Charles feels deeply but by nature avoids confrontation. William is increasingly acting as The Firm’s ‘gatekeeper’ – a role previously performed by Prince Philip. Royal biographer Robert Lacey describes the task as ‘Royal bouncer’ – a much grander version of a nightclub doorman keeping trouble at bay.

William the Incandescent: William was said to be incandescent that his wife was dragged into the firing line during the Oprah interview and that his subsequent phone call with Harry was leaked and then reported on American television in such a vulgar way. Confrontation with his younger brother is not something William is fond of, but nor is it something from which he shies away. His ‘bouncer’ duties are bound to increase, with Charles having less of a stomach for the fight and the Duke of Edinburgh having retired from the fray.

[From The Daily Mail]

How in God’s name was Kate “verbally mauled”? Meghan said Kate made her cry, when Kate’s people had insisted for more than two years that Meghan made HER cry. Is that a verbal mauling now? Lord. Anyway, this is just a reminder that the courtiers could not find their own asses with two hands and a map. They are really panicking and it’s pathetic to watch. As for William and his “gatekeeping”… like, we get it. He smeared Meghan in the name of keeping his family pure and white and mostly German. He’s incandescent that his house of cards is crumbling.

Here’s William the Gatekeeper with his Black friend. He would not be working this hard if he wasn’t the one who asked about the baby’s skin color.

Seyi Obakin has known Prince William for more than 10 years, and once slept rough with him. He speaks about their enduring friendship https://t.co/arMj9N7jcM

— The Telegraph (@Telegraph) March 20, 2021

Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Avalon Red.

Dear Gossips, Sandra Oh is currently in Pittsburgh shooting a new series. On Saturday she made as surprise appearance at the local Stop Asian Hate protest to lend her voice in raising awareness for the surge in anti-Asian violence that has been happening over the last year, resulting in last week’s …

In 2019, London Mayor Sadiq Khan was targeted by Donald Trump in a series of hateful, stupid, fascist tweets. Trump referred to Khan as a “stone-cold loser” and various other dumb sh-t. Khan barely engaged with Trump, merely keeping it to the point that history would not look kindly on the Johnson government or the royal family for hosting Trump’s extravagant state visit. Trump felt comfortable insulting Khan because Khan is a Pakistani-British and a practicing Muslim. I bring all of that up because I think many non-British people probably just consider Khan someone with liberal/progressive politics who embraces inclusion and diversity in a time where there’s a rise in white supremacy across the board. I’m not here to debate his politics – I’m not British and I’m not a Londoner. But I do think what he said recently about the Duchess of Sussex, the Windsor klan, racism and diversity is worth discussing, especially since Khan has likely been targeted with a similar racist, hateful energy.

Sadiq Khan today said the allegations that a member of the royal family raised concerns about Harry and Meghan’s son “beggared belief”. The Mayor of London described the Oprah Winfrey interview with the Duke and Duchess of Sussex as “heartbreaking” and “distressing”.

Asked on LBC if he had ever had conversations about the potential skin colour of a baby with parents from different ethnicities, Mr Khan replied: “Never, no, and I’ve got members of my family who are mixed race so it beggars belief. It is something that I’m sure the royal family are looking into…I’ll make this point, by the way, I’ve been to Grenfell many many times but I particularly remember going to Grenfell community in the days after Meghan had been there and I’ve got to tell you she touched people’s lives in ways nobody had.”

The Mayor of London said it was possible to be a fan of both sides of the royal family, adding: “This black and white stuff is not good in relation to you either like somebody and hate the other person. It is really sad what’s happened.”

Asked what he thought of the interview, he told LBC: “It was heartbreaking actually. You’ve got a family where there is a big rift. Some of the things that Meghan and Harry said were quite distressing. At the end of the day, it is possible to someone who is a fan of Her Majesty the Queen, somebody who thinks highly of Charles and William and to also think highly of Harry and Meghan and be heartbroken that there is a family having real strains and struggles. As many families do.”

He also said Harry and William speaking out about their own mental health gave him the confidence to do so too.

[From The Evening Standard]

I think he threaded that needle in a thoughtful way, and in a way which should have been emulated by the actual Windsor klan – you know, concern for Harry and Meghan, an acknowledgement that what they’ve been through is tough and distressing in a larger sense. Why is the Mayor of London’s response better than the Johnson government’s response or the Windsors’ response? I wonder.

Plus, Khan is making the point that Meghan in particular was able to reach out to people and communities of color in a way the rest of the family would not and cannot. It reminds me of the story, years ago, which was basically like… the Grenfell tragedy was an issue Prince William “wanted” as future future king. He wanted to show up twice a year and put on his Concerned Face with victims of the Grenfell fire and get credit for “helping.” And then Meghan walked in and she stole his thunder. The Grenfell women loved her and saw her as a sister, as someone they could relate to, and Meghan began putting together the cookbook before William even had time to throw a tantrum about it.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid and WENN.

It’s my hope that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are in the last throes of their neverending divorce, and that this is the year everything will finally be settled. There’s some kind of upcoming trial or big hearing about the terms of custody for the younger children, and we still haven’t heard much about the financial aspect of the divorce finalization. Last week, The Blast got their hands on some new filings from Angelina, where she informed the court that she would be providing testimony and evidence of Brad’s domestic violence against her or the children or all of the above. Us Weekly also had a story about how Maddox (who is 19) has already provided testimony and it was “not flattering” to Brad. All of which leads me to this Page Six piece, which is yet another smear job from Team Pitt. Some highlights:

Brad is “heartbroken”: Brad Pitt is heartbroken over the leak from the Angelina Jolie camp that she is ready to testify about alleged spousal abuse in their trial over child custody, according to insiders. On March 12, Jolie, 45, filed court documents indicating that both she and her children are willing to offer testimony and “proof and authority in support” of her allegations against Pitt, 57. The court documents, in this case, are private and sealed but were leaked to Hollywood blog The Blast.

Just an endless amount of whining: A source close to Pitt said: “Brad is heartbroken that Angelina has gone that route. There’s a lot of emotion left after their marriage. He has taken responsibility for his actions and owned up to his past issues, he’s stopped drinking. The marriage was very passionate and toxic at times and — like all couples — they had fights, but also shared many good times together. He has talked about his drink and drug problems during the time they were together.”

He’s never attacked Angelina? “Brad and his camp has never attacked Angelina. But his camp feels this leak was calculated to sway opinion ahead of the conclusion of their trial,” the source said. “Brad feels like he’s being more and more isolated from his children, and he’s devastated about it.”

Will this be over soon? It is hoped the trial will end next month and the judge — which Angelina has tried and so far not succeeded in removing from the case — will rule on custody. Judge John W. Ouderkirk — who actually married Pitt and Jolie — has denied any personal bias or prejudice concerning any party or attorney in this case.

Did Maddox testify or not? Sources tell Page Six that the kids have been interviewed by court-appointed therapists, but it is believed recent reports that eldest son Maddox, 19, gave negative testimony against Pitt are untrue. His relationship with Maddox has been described as “difficult,” which Pitt is said to be heartbroken over.

[From Page Six]

I have no idea if Angelina or her lawyers leaked her filing to The Blast or whether it was some clerk or paralegal or whatever. It doesn’t really seem like Angelina’s style to leak that kind of stuff, but who knows what we would do in her situation. Especially since, contrary to what Brad’s team is saying now, they’ve been smearing her for years now. There have been periods when it’s gotten really ugly and… like Brad’s emotional abuse of Angelina has been happening out in the open.

Remember this curious story last year? Suddenly, Team Pitt was all conciliatory with Angelina and admitting that she’s been a great mother. Buried deep with the Entertainment Tonight piece, there was the admission that Angelina hasn’t been “keeping the kids from Brad” – the family court has determined the visitation schedule AND the years of monitored visitation for Brad. My point is that I still think Brad is playing fast and loose with what’s actually going on here and I can’t wait for all of his lies and smears to come back to bite.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red and Backgrid.

All of the British papers had stories about Queen Elizabeth this weekend and it’s getting to be… a lot. In the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s interview, one of the most damaging things to the monarchy wasn’t even what they said explicitly, it was just the vague impression – received from a series of breadcrumbs left by Harry – that the Queen is not really in charge. That the Men in Grey are running the show, with the Charles Regency in full effect. Which is why the Mail on Sunday actually ran a panicked little story called “The Queen is not a puppet! Her Majesty has never been more in charge or more ready to be ruthless after Harry and Meghan’s claim that ‘men in suits’ run the monarchy.” These people are so obvious, my God.

In the refined environment of Windsor Castle, a calmness is slowly being re-established following the tremors of that Oprah Winfrey interview. When not at her desk working, the Queen is said to enjoy playing cards with her lady-in-waiting.

‘There is a sense of order, not panic,’ a source says. After all, there are more pressing national matters than the Sussexes’ salvo of woes.

Worries about the global pandemic and financial earthquake apart, the Queen was greatly relieved to welcome home her husband after four weeks of hospital treatment. Prince Philip, less than 100 days shy of his 100th birthday, is said to be in good spirits. Yet for all the outward calm, something profound has changed at Windsor – and decisively so.

For these are extraordinary times for the Royal Family. In response to Harry and Meghan’s incendiary and hurtful accusations – addressed to a global TV audience of millions – the Queen has responded with a show of force. She has made it as clear as possible that she, and she alone, remains in charge. Such leadership is vital. The Sussexes’ claims are not just hurtful, they are dangerous to the image of the Windsors and of Britain as a country.

[From The Mail on Sunday]

Yeah, if you have to make this big of a point that Liz is in charge, then she isn’t. She’s just a pawn of a far-right wing (and incompetent) political operation. And notice that these Men in Grey can’t even get their stories straight – Liz doesn’t even care about the Sussexes but she’s in charge of this far-reaching response to the Sussexes across several palaces. Uh-huh. Speaking of, it certainly sounds like *someone* knows that there’s a lot of racism in the palaces:

The Queen is to appoint a diversity tsar to modernise the Monarchy, The Mail on Sunday can reveal. Sources say the proposed move is an acknowledgment that ‘more needs to be done’ to champion minorities’ rights and follows the explosive claims made by the Duke and Duchess of Sussex of institutional racism.

As part of a major drive encompassing Buckingham Palace, Clarence House and Kensington Palace, aides will undertake a ‘listen and learn’ exercise over the coming weeks which will involve speaking to a range of businesses and individuals about how the Monarchy can improve representation. Plans seen by this newspaper detail how the Palace will ‘seek independent views’ to help assess and improve the approach to diversity – including ethnic minorities, the disabled and the gay and trans communities. The potential recruitment of a diversity chief to champion reform is also set out.

A Royal source said: ‘This is an issue which has been taken very seriously across the Households. We have the policies, procedures and programmes in place but we haven’t seen the progress we would like and accept more needs to be done. We can always improve. We are not afraid to look at new ways of approaching it. The work to do this has been under way for some time now and comes with the full support of the family.’ The project has been given fresh impetus as Harry and Meghan appear to step up their battle with the Royal Family over racism.

[From The Daily Mail]

This about how f–king stupid these people are. They had a front-row seat to their own vile, racist, misogynistic smear campaign against Meghan and it was so bad that Meghan LEFT THE COUNTRY and called out their racism in a huge interview… and it’s only now that they’re doing a little bit of busywork with a “diversity czar.” Lord. “I’m astonished and shocked to learn how racist we’ve been for centuries!” GMAFB. But sure, Liz is “in charge.”

Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Avalon Red, WENN.